Christian faith and Mental Illness

@Doglover

You asked about Mr D and anxiety, he still struggles with this but depression lifted and mood stable since being on a MS. Whether or not he can do without AP (he had psychosis) remains to be seen.

Early on he saw a private pdoc (did not end well) and is under public pdoc now.

Has just started with private bulk billing psychologist (with MHCP). I don't think he would attend appts if he had to pay. He found attending a GROW group helpful too. therapy is part of best practice and I would encourage you to do so along with charting mood (Black Dog website has mood charts), keeping open communication in relation to your treatment with your hubby is shown to be helpful in the relationship side of things.

In relation to faith, it was only after his crisis that Mr D could see just how much God had protected him. (A bit like "Footprints in the sand").

Can I gently encourage you in relation to your marriage? I found a Christian mental health support site that helped me realise that we can live well in spite of a diagnosis and I hold onto that hope. It was started by Brad Hoefs who had BP himself. Three things really helped Mr D & I, one was me learning about his condition and how to support him in a healthy way (I got some free carer education from Wellways) two, resuming my own interests which I had put aside when he was acutely unwell (does hubby have a hobby or sport he could engage in a couple of times a week?). Lastly was not to withhold intimacy or appreciation even when it was difficult for me.

Hi @Former-Member , thanks heaps for your response. Im glad to hear that Mr D is improved from where he was, thats really good. Interesting re better outcomes with public pdoc than private, iv bn considering getting a 2nd opinion from private psychiatrist, currently public.

I hav just finished intro to group therapy thru public system, start actual therapy group in about 3 weeks. 3 month wait for psychol thru public system, mayb private wld b better so i can see a Christian psychol?? All $$'s tho, which we dont hav! Thanks for tip re charting mood and BD website.

Re open communication with hubby - i totally agree and am trying to facilitate that but its not working. I even told him this arvo that thr r some things we rly need to talk about before my appt with phsychiatrist tmrw but so far he has not bn forthcoming with the opportunity to discuss anything. I think he finds it easier to hav as little involvement as possible, but that doesnt help me none! Especially when they are talking about admitting me to get me off the short term meds, which i am petrified of! I rly need to b able to talk to him about it but the channels of communication just dont seem to b open when it comes to my MI. Its a very difficult situation to b in. I so wish my hubby had the same sort of attitude as u, wanting to learn and understand about my condition and support me thru it, and b more involved in the process.

Are u able to share link to christian MH support site?

Thanks re Wellways tip!

Hubby doesnt hav interests and hobbies that can b engaged in on a weekly basis, but we do hav a block in the country which is his 'baby', thats his therapy. He has bn down thr more times in the last cpl of months than normal and i hav b encouraging him to do that. He has bn enjoying it very much which is grt, unfortunately im still not getting the support i need.

Thank you so much for your openness @Former-Member and all your practical tips and advice, it rly is much apprdciated. Thank you for taking the time to share and to help.

May God bless u & Mr D.

Xxx

PS: I hope and pray that i, along with my hubby, will indeed b able to live well again, despite my diagnoses. Its not something that i hav held out much hope for over the last 7 months.

Hi @Doglover

Yes, some, but not all blokes find it difficult with any health things, let alone MH.

*to be continued, hit post by mistake

@Doglover

Mr Darcy did see a Christian counselor early on but his problems were beyond the scope of the counselor's training. He has found a therapeutic alliance more important, with some therapists being helpful, others not. As far as I know they have all been respectful of his faith. You can google bulk bill christian psychologist along with your closest town and you might find there is one near you. . There are some but not many private psychiatrists who will bulk bill but you can also google them. Adding financial stress to health stress = yikes.

Going to hospital to come off meds can be a scary thing. Can I say how courageous it is of you to seek help despite the difficulties you have encountered and given that strength you have shown that you will be able to live a hope filled life in spite of your struggles. Can I encourage you to hold onto hope for both your anxiety and for your relationship, perhaps you are feeling a little that hubby has his head in the sand. No doubt there are different dynamics as to what you experienced from when caring with your mother, but different is not wrong and as Ali11 mentioned, it is early days in relation to your issues and I know it took hubby & I while to work out what healthy involvement for me was. This can happen across all types of medical conditions, not just mental health - my SIL found my brother less than helpful in relation to her cancer and she came to peace with this found an understanding friend was a better option in relation to personal support in her health journey. (And yes, I do wish I could give my brother a dose of empathy pills too and I know she does too). This article may be of help to you https://www.heysigmund.com/anxiety-and-intimate-relationships-how-to-stop-anxiety-from-stealing-the-magic/

As the American Christian support group does not have Australian accreditation I have been told I am not to name it on this forum, but these are the tenets for patients and loved ones that really helped me. I think that GROW groups also have tenets that they work off encouraging each other in a positive manner. The fellow who started the support groups has bipolar and he found that the groups he attended were negative and he felt a more positive approach was needed.

Wow! Thank u @Former-Member for your reply, full of excellent information. I will post more when i have a bit more time but just wanted to let u know how much i appreciate your post and all the effort you put in to helping me. Thank u!!! ☺

Hope I have not overloaded you @Doglover . Hope things sort for you with your upcoming appt/possible admission.

Will leave you in peace, but do feel free to tag me if you would like some prayer etc as I do not visit the LE side of the forum too often (except for Friday Feast). I promise to try not to be too helpful😁. Have added you to the list of "forum friends" that I pray for regularly.

wow @Former-Member

Hello @Doglover

Wow @Former-Member!

I rly do thank u so much for all that valuable information and for taking the time to share it with me. Your post really is quite something and shows an obvious desire to help others. Thank u.

Im glad Mr D has found a therapist that he finds helpful.

Unfortunately i havnt found any bulk bill psychol's near me, let along Christian ones. They only bulk bill if u hav a hcc which i dont. Even tho im off work i get a % of my salary from income protection insuurance so am not eligible for hcc.

Financial stress - yes huge one for us. Doesnt help thats for sure. We live a life of faith when it comes to finances. My husband serves the Lord in ministry and we look to the Lord to provide our needs. While things hav come down to the wire on many occasions, He has always met our needs. But thrs not money spare for private psychiatrists or psychol's.

Thank u so much for ur encouragement re holding on to hope for my health and my marriage. My husband rly does love me so for that i am grateful. He has some learning and growing to do through this situation as do i. Thank u for sharing about ur and ur hubby's experience with trying to figure this all out, and how we each fit in the picture. We r blessed in that we can pray to our Heavenly Father for help in all these things - so mant ppl dont hav that.

Thanks so much for the link, i look frward to reading it. Will post this for now as its time to serve dinner but will come back later!

@Shaz51 @Ali11

Hi @Former-Member , back again! Thank u for the info from the American Christian support group. The tenets are something rly worth taking time to consider and work thru. Theres so much to take in, more than one cld do with a casual reading, or even reading a cpl of times. I will try and find this online for myself or if not, will type out and put somewhere that i can read and review regularly, along with the principles u listed at the end. There is so much great information in your post @Former-Member and i sincerely thank you for the effort you put in to helping me. I will take the time to get the most out of it!

A little bit of good news, i was so scared of the appt i had this arvo but my husband prayed with me earnestly this morning which was a real blessing, and he attended the appt with me. Thr was no talk of admission which was a huge relief. I know it is still a possibility in the future if things dont go according to plan, but hopefully i wont hav to face that!

So again, my sincere thank you darcy for everything. You have bn a real blessing in the giving of your time, understanding, empathy and experience. Thank you and may God bless you. Xx

@Shaz51

@Former-Member You havnt overwhelmed me, just a lot to take in, but its all good stuff and worth the time to get the most out of it. You can be helpful anytime! Youve bn a blessing! Thank you so much for including me in your prayers, i appreciate it so much. I will pray for u and Mr D also. And will keep tagging u in to this or other relevant convo's if u dont mind.

Thank you again for everything!

@Shaz51