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Something’s not right

I feel sad and pathetic

I feel sad and pathetic

Hey. Is anyone around?

17 replies

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In response to: I feel sad and pathetic

Re: I feel sad and pathetic

I don't want to go to hospital. No one is making me or saying I have to. But I'm sick of being this way. Idk what I have to do.

I've lost interest in taking care of myself. I seem to go well for a bit then I just tank. I'm really exhausted today and I don't know why. I've barely been up for 2 hours. My medications might be doing this, my GP said to look at reducing them but I can't do that yet because I'm too afraid I won't sleep well enough.

I'm sick of mental health and mental illness. It's just ruining my life. These are meant to be my years in the sun as a mid 20s kid but then I look at my MH and it's just ruining me.

I have figured out that most of the things I try to do are useless because someone else is always better at them or more qualified. Why does everyone have to tell me that I can do better? Or at least, why do I have to keep telling this to myself? It's not helping because if it did help then I wouldn't be going around in circles all the bloody time now would i?

I'm sick of people. I'm sick of the world. I'm sick of mental health.

I don't want to go to hospital and I don't want to see another psychologist again. Something's gotta give.... Idk anymore

In response to: Re: I feel sad and pathetic

Re: I feel sad and pathetic

is sane chat working yet @Former-Member

In response to: Re: I feel sad and pathetic

Re: I feel sad and pathetic

@MDT Hi Hamsolo01 sorry you are feeling so shite atm :(. Mi si a total b1tch what can I say. I am here on and off if you want to talk or just listen if you would prefer. greenpea xx

In response to: Re: I feel sad and pathetic

Re: I feel sad and pathetic

Hey @Bunniekins

Thanks my friend. I am at the gym just to get the blood flow going. Not planning on much but hopefully it will help me wake up a bit.

I also cancelled the half marathon. I don't think I'm fit enough to do it and I also haven't raised a dime. Plus I'm not comfortable with where the charity is headed. It seems a bit too PC and less about promoting mental health awareness and just about good Vibes etc.....

Anyways. I am feeling low today about all of my life. Not SI or anything but just low. That's why I said sad and pathetic as the title of this post thread.

I'm not sure what I have to do in my life to make things change. It seems every time I try to go somewhere in the direction that I want to go I just get spat back on the face.

In response to: Re: I feel sad and pathetic

Re: I feel sad and pathetic

hi @MDT you're having a rough time you poor old sausage.

I've been struggling too with the basics of showering, dressing and brushing my teeth. It's hard.

Have you been to hospital before? I've never been so can't comment but is this something you think would be helpful atm?

In response to: Re: I feel sad and pathetic

Re: I feel sad and pathetic

@MDT Going to the gym is a great idea. Getting out and doing something physical is a good way to help get rid of the blues :). Unfortunately (take this from an old chook who has seen alot in her lifetime) being spat in the face as you put it so well is part of life but there are ups as well I think to balance out the bad.

I did a half marathon was running everyday for a year and a bit to train up plus weights and stuff and yes it nearly did me doing it but felt so good at the end. I couldn't do a whole marathon that really would do me some damage I am just not built for running even though I love it :).

There are lots of marathons I did the Canberra Marathon and it was lovely.

In response to: Re: I feel sad and pathetic

Re: I feel sad and pathetic

Hi Hamsolo,

Sherpa09 here, (one of the moderators on the SANE forum). Sorry to hear you are struggling at the moment. It can be difficult when everything seems to be going against you, where you can feel a strong sense of isolation. If you're in need of further support I suggest contacting lifeline on 13 11 14 or beyond blue 1300 22 4636, where they'd be further be able to further unpack what might be going on for you at the moment. Otherwise please let us know how we can best support you through this difficult time. I have also sent a private email regarding this post.

Sherpa09.

In response to: Re: I feel sad and pathetic

Re: I feel sad and pathetic

Yeah @BryanaCamp in the past hospital has helped. But I am in agreement with my p doc that at this point in time I don't really need it. He said it was good I avoided it last time and I do agree with him.

Im just taking it easy with gym. Gonna do a bit of weight stuff now. That's it. Coffee after. Then two job applications when I get home.

@Bunniekins I guess the real reason I didn't do it is because I don't like the direction that the charity is going in. Although maybe I'm not interested in it anymore idk.

Anyways. I feel a little bit better. But still annoyed at myself.

In response to: Re: I feel sad and pathetic

Re: I feel sad and pathetic

good onya @MDT gym is great. you know yourself well & you trust your pdoc so avoiding hospital seems a good idea. i've managed to bite the bullet and consolidate my super this morning - a bureaucratic nightmare I've been avoiding as my supers are all so small the govt will simply take them off me (all my hard-earned $ from 10-20 years ago) if I don't consolidate. It reflects my ability to only stick with jobs short term with my MI! so I have all these different supers.

I've been unemployed for 7 years Hamsolo due to MI and this year I've put my everything into trying to get a job but have been unsuccessful so I definitely understand how you feel. The rejections are brutal. It's emotionally exhausting putting yourself out there into the sometimes harsh recruitment world and performing in interviews and perfecting & finessing job applications. You're not alone.

I think you're well ahead of me in having been so recently employed and having positive references from that. Whereas I have a gaping 7 year gap of unemployment.

I have been volunteering for about 12 months. Although it's gone a tad pear-shaped with this mean man I volunteer with, on the whole it's been very positive and the staff are so lovely and supportive, they are cheering me on in my employment search which makes a big difference to my confidence. It also gives my week some structure - on wednesdays I have to get up and dressed and go there & perform my duties and behave professionally all day. So that may be something you want to try.

I was also wondering of you'd like to go to a support group once a week. Again it provides structure to the week, gives you somewhere you've gotta be one day a week.

enjoy your coffee, you deserve it

hi @Bunniekins good to see you as always

In response to: Re: I feel sad and pathetic

Re: I feel sad and pathetic

I actually started going to a support group @BryanaCamp a little while back. For people with depression. It wasn't bad. I found it useful but it also became a drag. I went to the social anxiety one and only lasted one session because it wasn't for me.

I found another in my local area that's on once per month. It wasn't bad. There was a lot of woollen support though. It doesn't help me. But I also tried starting up a meetup too but that didn't go as well as I'd hoped. Lots of cancellong and group politics

I'm aware of what you saying though so don't take my words the wrong way.

As for the employment stuff. Yeah. My biggest qualm with it is that every single individual employer likes a certain type of cv or resume. If it's not to a tee then it's no deal. There is a generally agreed upon form that resumes and cv should take however what the individual is looking for always changes depending on the role and such.

It's emotionally exhausting. So that's why I set the goal of two applications per day. That's a good start.

I'm still passionate about my area of study (government, politics and international relations) so I'm having that on the side and then also going to pursue a solid form of work and income. Even if it's only vaguely useful for the long run. So things like research and project planning etc. It's hard to know what to look for exactly when you are unsure of what to look for. I know I'm capable. Where I get depressed is when I'm not able to show it. I'm not sure how to do this for every single person that reads my resume and cv.

I am also looking at hosting a website to publish content on as well. So that's something to spend time on
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