Connect with people who understand what you are going through, seek advice and surround yourself with support. We're free, anonymous, and professionally moderated 24/7.

47,612Members
1,358,869Posts
1,400,000Visitors

Nothing helps

Serenity1Senior Contributor27 Apr 2019, 12:52 pm AEST

Nothing helps

I am having so much overwhemling anxiety & agoraphobia about my daughter starting her new school this Tuesday-

i don't know how I'm going to be able to do it- I don't know how I am physically going to be able to take her to her new class & deal with all the new people kids teachers & parents- I don't know how I am going to be able to support her & help her through her nerves & discomfort when I am feeling so so sick & not well in my own head & body.

This is one of the reasons I didn't want to change schools because my agoraphobia & anxiety are so bad & I am not coping- but it had to be done.

I feel like I'm falling apart & I don't have anyone to help if I crumble in a heap.

I am very reluctant to tell the new school about my MH issues- because the last school I told & it was not respected & used against me,when she was having difficulties that they ignored-in the end I was blamed-I am feeling really traumatised by the whole thing & I know my daughter is also-& I am not strong enough to help her-

i hate myself- I hate everything about myself - I can't stop crying-

i need to get myself together to be together enough to help her- but literally every cell in my is body is screaming on in pain & I am struggling - I don't want to feel like this- I need to help my daughter

11 replies

1 - 10 of 11

1 2

In response to: Nothing helps

Ali11Senior Contributor27 Apr 2019, 1:19 pm AEST

Re: Nothing helps

We're so sorry to hear that your anxiety and agoraphobia is rising ahead of Tuesday @Serenity1. Is your daughter looking forward to starting her new school?

In response to: Re: Nothing helps

Serenity1Senior Contributor27 Apr 2019, 2:19 pm AEST

Re: Nothing helps

Not really- she is becoming more & more nervous- which is to be expected- but I it is triggering me & making me feel like I won't be able to cope & help her because I will be having a breakdown- which is why I didn't want to move in the first place- it's so unfair- she only has me to rely only

In response to: Re: Nothing helps

Serenity1Senior Contributor27 Apr 2019, 2:20 pm AEST

Re: Nothing helps

@Ali11

In response to: Re: Nothing helps

Ali11Senior Contributor27 Apr 2019, 8:36 pm AEST

Re: Nothing helps

That does make it difficult @Serenity1, but you've got this! It's good to remember that once that initial discomfort is out of the way, you'll both feel a bit more relaxed about the new school and it may even be a pleasant improvement on the last one. Often we get stuck in thinking about what could go wrong, or imagining ourselves at our worst in that new situation, but what if it all goes right? What if you get there and they smile and are supportive? Regardless of how it goes, you've got a lot of support on here if you need it. Sending you love

In response to: Re: Nothing helps

BryanaCampSenior Contributor28 Apr 2019, 1:38 pm AEST

Re: Nothing helps

hi @Serenity1

I just want to say well done for changing your daughter's school, you're a great mum for doing that. (I wish my mum had cared that much about me when I was growing up but she was too busy to notice). It must have taken a lot of strength, initiative and energy.

I agree with your instincts to keep your MI private. I really don't tell anyone about my MI because I'm a private person & it's nobody's business. Often it's on the tip of my tongue to disclose it to explain who I am & what I've been doing. But when I have told someone, I've later on regretted it because there is so much misunderstanding about MI that I feel devalued & invalidated by ttheir comments, even when they are trying to be nice or interested.

I agree with @Ali11 the new school may have nice people. In my experience, there are nice people out in the world, sometimes you just have to kiss a few frogs first to meet them. I sympathise with your anxiety, I get strong social anxiety before any social situation. It's a bit better with medications and exposure to a lot of socilaising but it's still hard. I'm sure you'll surpirse yourself on Tuesday & do really well

In response to: Nothing helps

CheerBearSenior Contributor29 Apr 2019, 7:23 pm AEST

Re: Nothing helps

Hey @Serenity1. Calling by to see how you're doing and to wish you the best with your daughter getting off to school tomorrow. Really hoping this new start helps you both.

In response to: Re: Nothing helps

Ali11Senior Contributor29 Apr 2019, 8:38 pm AEST

Re: Nothing helps

Also checking in with you @Serenity1, wishing you and your daughter the best for tomorrow.

In response to: Re: Nothing helps

Serenity1Senior Contributor01 May 2019, 3:40 pm AEST

Re: Nothing helps

@CheerBear 💖 Thankyou so much- you are always so thoughtful & supportive- it Really means a lot!! - so far-so good!
She has a very nice teacher! This is the first teacher that has treated her nicely since pre-Primary-(when we moved into her old school- were we had all the problems-she had 3 teachers who were mean to her-grade 1,2,&3)- so Indi is happy finally- hopefully it lasts!- she has also been allowed to repeat year Two again! So I am so happy about that- because she is so far behind! & I am positive that as well as being mean to her- the teachers were not teaching her- (she has even said this herself)- so I am so happy to have her out of that environment!- Indi said she is so happy she never has to go back into her old class with that teacher-& on the first day she was saying to me she was worried she would get in trouble because she didn't know anything at new school-& the receptionist said " no you won't get in trouble- there is no getting in trouble here "- Indi was amazed because she got in trouble for absolutely everything at the other school- not knowing how to spell her last name- she gets in trouble- but they don't teach her how to spell it-doesn't know how to use paragraphs she gets in big trouble- but she has never been taught how to-& then they don't teach her once they've realise she doesn't know how to & have got her in big trouble for not knowing how to- they just leave her not knowing how to do these things & the list went on & on & on-- basically everything she does she get in trouble for- yet they don't teach her how to do things- such a toxic environment! - sorry for rambling- new school big improvement so far! Huge grin on her face first day I picked her up- about to go pick her up for second day soon- fingers crossed thanks for your kind thoughts xxx

In response to: Re: Nothing helps

Serenity1Senior Contributor01 May 2019, 3:41 pm AEST

Re: Nothing helps

@Ali11 Thankyou so much! 💖 That is so kind & thoughtful of you- I really appreciate it xxx

In response to: Re: Nothing helps

Ali11Senior Contributor01 May 2019, 6:32 pm AEST

Re: Nothing helps

That new school does sound like a huge improvement already @Serenity1! Having teachers who genuinely care about the kids makes such a difference in how much they learn and how they feel about themselves. Fantastic to hear they're already looking after Indi and she won't have to be worried about getting into trouble

1 - 10 of 11

1 2