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For 20-odd years I worked as an electrical engineer and technical writer. The stress and long hours were great for someone like me with bipolar - I could cope very well...
Until I would crash and burn into a major depression, that is...
For 20 years I repeated the same pattern - hypomanic high for about 2 years, then depression for about 6 months, hardly able to leave my darkened bedroom...
Repeat until life gets totally screwed up by a 2 year long depression and failed marriage (which finally led to diagnosis and treatment).
I've hardly worked in 5 years. Perhaps 5 or 6 weeks of technical writing (it's been dead since the global financial crisis) and a couple of months of bar work, pulling beers and making cocktails...
I was on Newstart for a year or so. I have a special hatred for how heartless the Centrelink system can be, how terrible it makes you feel. During that time, I applied for over 200 jobs. I did all in my power, but achieved exactly nothing... only 5 or 6 bothered to even send me an automated rejection email. The rest? A vast deafening silence, so that I never knew if my job applications were good, bad or indifferent. It was brutal...
I had to sell my house. When I converted the bricks and mortar to dollars in the bank, my Centrelink problems went away - no more support, and thankfully no more rubbish of theirs to deal with...
I've been self-funding my unemployment for 2 years now, travelling around Oz in a motorhome with my lovely partner.
But reality awaits. The party (and the money) never lasts forever. The rolling wheels have to stop sometime.
So, I've applied for a job. First time in 2 years. There's a bad taste in my mouth from my previous experiences, but I hope it will be different this time. The job is perfect for me - suits my experience and skills 100 percent.
It's a full time position. I haven't worked one of those since 2006. For 10 years, I've been doing contract consulting work through my own business.
I've learnt a lot about my bipolar in the past 4 years... I believe I'm ready...
In response to: Re: First Job Application In 2 Years
KurraSenior Contributor
Re: First Job Application In 2 Years
Go boyo, you'll do fine @Silenus!
I'm not attempting to steal your thunder but yesterday I got half an hours notice for an interview. I knew there was a possibility of it coming up this week but not half an hour before the 'chat about the job'. I received an email inforing me that they had contacted the appropriate people to organise a psychological assessment! This is not because of my bipolar but the nature of the work involved. Let's just say it can be rather emotionally challenging. I can't say any more about it.
Perhaps it's a bit premature but it's a very fast moving job and I must admit I'm excited. I'm not fussed about the psych assessment as I don't believe it will be a problem. Everyone knows about my bipolar so I've got nothing to hide. It's 24/7 rostered shifts but since I don't appear to have any circadian rhythms ( never had jet lag) it shouldn't pose a problem.
I've got my fingers crossed for you Si and for me too!
Hugzzz to all.
In response to: Re: First Job Application In 2 Years
SilenusSenior Contributor
Re: First Job Application In 2 Years
Crossing fingers, @Kurra! Best of luck with it all.
The job I'm applying for is a state government thing, and they sent me an email telling me that there may be psych evals and all of that stuff. But, as with you, I am an open book about it these days, have nothing to hide (for better or worse, because there is still unavoidable stigma out there), and feel that there will be no problems with a psych questionnaire, poke and prod... hahaha...
In response to: Re: First Job Application In 2 Years
AppleblossomSenior Contributor
Re: First Job Application In 2 Years
Wow .. finally I meet someone like me without circadian rhthyms .. @Kurra lol ... but you probably know how to use a metronome if needed .. well my wind teacher is mad about them ...
May the force be with you both @Silenus and @Kurra .. its not usually just luck
It is important and inspiring that neither of you are worried about the psych evaluations.
In response to: Re: First Job Application In 2 Years
BeeGeeSenior Contributor
Re: First Job Application In 2 Years
Exciting times @Silenus and @Kurra! All the best to both of you. How do you feel your interview went Kurra? Did you get a positive feeling about it? I find that's often a pretty good indicator. Kudos to both of you for being up front about your MIs... I don't have the balls for that just yet!
How is your application coming along Si? When you say it's a 100% fit do you mean with your skill set, or with your worldview? Do either of these take a hit in order to take the job, and will that be OK?
I like your three reasons for taking a job; I think in the past my jobs have centred on earning money and keeping busy - which probably led to me being completely dissatisfied with it and making my massive career change. I am looking forward to working to make a difference next year (or at least working towards that).
In response to: Re: First Job Application In 2 Years
KurraSenior Contributor
Re: First Job Application In 2 Years
Hi @BeeGee,
The interview went really well particulalrly since I'd been given minimal time to research adequately.
Nevertheless I was able to give chapter and verse of the underlying legislation. The trick for me is to put that boring stuff to music, then I can basically quote it verbatim. I'm not blowing my trumpet here it just that by applying a melody to information it sticks hard. Music is how I make sense of my world. I was a professional muso for a long time. This is ongoing although I don't accept as many contracts as I used to do. I certainly left the interview with a feel good confidence. In addition they would not have arranged a psych assessment if they weren't seriously interested. The type our place does are long and extremely comprehensive.
Since I also spent many years studying psychology I know what is involved. Honesty and integrity go a looong way.
As for not being worried about who knows, I must admit that it took me 12 years to fully accept that I'm Kurra who happens to have bipolar. I'm far too lazy to try remember all the lies I'd have to if I didn't have it out in the open. That's something I couldn't handle at all.
That post diagnosis period can be an arduous time. You will know when the time is or isn't right for you.
Hope all is going well for you.
Hugzzz
In response to: First Job Application In 2 Years
SilenusSenior Contributor
Re: First Job Application In 2 Years
Hiya @BeeGee - the fit is 100% with skills and experience, and it's a public utility providing water to people, so I guess the values are okies... hahaha...
Having said that, there's lots of times my rather unusual values clash with mainstream society. There's lots of times where they clash with "out there" society too...
I'm an odd fish. I swim against currents most fish don't even recognise, but that's the way my gills, fins and scales are built, I'm afraid... I stopped fighting it and just accepted it about 4 or 5 years ago, and my life has been infinitely more peaceful and lacking in conflict since...
I've yet to find someone like me. I'm not even a one percenter, I'm afraid. It has been a lonely life in my 44 years on this planet. The vast majority of people don't travel in the currents I swim, and so I swim pretty well alone. Even my lovely partner only gets me on certain levels. The rest? Well, I swim alone, hoping to avoid getting fin rot...
I have worked jobs fundamentally against my values. Usually I last about 6 months to a year before burning out. I prefer something that resonates with my core values. That way, I can go for years and years...
Problem is... 90-odd percent of this modern world seems to me to be a profound materialistic waste of time, superficial and hypocritical and ignorant in the extreme, and it breaks me every time I have to make myself a lesser person, grin and bear it...
But... that's what I have to do to survive. I've tried fighting it in the past, but this one person cannot fight and beat a whole planet, much to my chagrin... hahaha...
In response to: Re: First Job Application In 2 Years
GonePirateSenior Contributor
Re: First Job Application In 2 Years
you can try to fight it... if ya do ill be in your corner ill be your cut man and squirt bottle holder I could also throw in your towel if the Tyson like heavy hitting world is doing a number on you then ill be you first aid man and put bandaids on you boo boos 😄
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