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A new start (kind of)

A new start (kind of)

Hi @Shaz51 @Zoe7 @outlander @TAB @Sam3 @utopia @Faith-and-Hope @Appleblossom @oceangirl @Sans911 @Snowie @Former-Member @soul @BryanaCamp @Former-Member @Bunniekins and whoever else is there in forumland

I have tagged some of you because we are speaking lots and some others haven't been around for long. If it's too much for you then that's okay I respect that. I won't take it personally.

I have decied to start up a new thread after my psychiatrist appointment today. Off to a new start.

Simply put, he made the point that I am pressuring myself to do stuff far more quickly than what I thought I could. When this approach fails, it feeds back into the loop that was there before (the "i am not good enough", "I have limited time", "I have wasted my life" etc).

He said it was good I didn't go to hospital and avoided ending up there. This doesn't help. What does help is changing the approach etc.

It was a good appointment. I see him again in the morning and then maybe someone else next week.

So it's not entirely hopeless or lost now.

He thought that pressuring myself to go and get this visa would be the wrong decision, given my state of panic yesterday and also this morning.

He said that I need to hold off on pressuring myself. By saying "okay now that I am in Australia for a bit longer, I need to go and find a job quickly" because this is simply unhelpful. It's the wrong attitude and will only feed back into those loops.

So am I feeling more settled? Yes. Do I know what is next? No. Does this bother me? No.

I see my psychologist tomorrow afternoon. I will get something from my psychiatrist in the morning about all of this I think, which he said he can send off as part of the extension on the visa (which lasts for 2 years anyway). It's just a case of extending the timeframe for when I can receive it.

This would effect my chances of working in defence, mi6 etc but these are already off the table for me given my history anyway. The same is the case for the military and police. It does seem like some things are cancelled out because of my MH, but maybe they are things I was never keen on anyways.

That's a side issue for now.

Going to the UK - still a goal. It's a case of how I get there and WHAT I do when I get there. We have established that rocking up with no job or place to live is too chaotic. Especially based on my experience and degree background and skills. But the UK is a goal. My Psychiatrist said "Poland is always there" so I think it might be worthwhile sending them an email asking if I could be either placed on next year's list OR alternatively get some of my money back given the circumstances. Again, not my concern for now.

My concern at the moment is explaining all this to dad. My Psych spoke to my mum today too so she is in the loop. I think he will understand, he wants what is best for me. It takes some adjustment and time. But this is life and how we live it.

THanks forumites. See you a bit later today

Edit: I heard today that one of my old tutees that i helped in 2017 is working and is at uni. Doing well and studying. I joked that we should meet up for coffee and then i can get a job at the same place lol. So today has had a silver lining. This was the student who nearly quit school. But I can only take as much credit for what they achieved. Most of it was them

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In response to: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Hey forum ma @Shaz51

In response to: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Hey all @Appleblossom @Former-Member @Shaz51

I had a good chat with an old colleague last night after I saw my school mate. Our chat went for about an hour and a half covering all sorts of topics. She is very committed to her Islamic faith which I respect. The dedication is next level.

We spoke about how society is kinda losing touch with the transcendent and the absolute. I think this is what all religions are tapping into.

I have been on my own journey. Good and bad. Spoke with psych about it yesterday. In the end, religion was something I needed when I was younger and that's ok. I needed to stop judging myself for what I believed. I was young.

I think we all have the religious inclination within us. It's just about how we keep in tune with it.
Do we seek validation from others as a substitute? Video games perhaps? Literature? Idk.

More questions than answers aye

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Yes, religion can be a cornerstone for social interaction too. When likeminded people can gather and bond over important aspects of their lives, it brings much more than the values and faith and belief too. I am not religious but I always found it beautiful and the people always seem so well connected to one another. I think much of this bonding has been transferred to online (on platforms) and with different interests (not religious) now and we have lost a lot of the face to face.

@MDT

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Yes I agree about the social life within religion @Former-Member It can be as good as it looks on the outside but not always ....

@MDT Great that you are having lots of social encounters with old friends and new.

I tend it think of religion as often bringing out the best in people, unless it causes conflict and it can do that a lot too. In some ways I am more for spirituality, but there are many traditions within established religions that can be beneficial and good for community and a place for people from all ages ...

Went shoe shopping with my son. We both bought the 2nd pair of shoes we tried on and ate Mexican out. YUM.

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Successful day @Appleblossom!

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Thanks @Former-Member Yes I got a lot done, as usual, but not eaten out with him for ages.

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Agreed @Appleblossom
I'm coming back around to religion spirituality speaking

It is what it is hey

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

I'd be keen to go to church just to see people I reckon hey @Former-Member @Appleblossom

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Yeah @MDT but as the pastoral care wokr said to me recently ... the problem with churches is they are full of people....lol

Learning to stand my ground and 'call it out' is new ... throwing a few jokes around helps.

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Lol @Appleblossom

I don't mind jesus it's his followers who I have issues with

Is another joke

Why don't baptists drink? It might lead to dancing is another I heard once

Haha.

Off to watch q and A here. Talking about foreign policy
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