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A new start (kind of)

A new start (kind of)

Hi @Shaz51 @Zoe7 @outlander @TAB @Sam3 @utopia @Faith-and-Hope @Appleblossom @oceangirl @Sans911 @Snowie @Former-Member @soul @BryanaCamp @Former-Member @Bunniekins and whoever else is there in forumland

I have tagged some of you because we are speaking lots and some others haven't been around for long. If it's too much for you then that's okay I respect that. I won't take it personally.

I have decied to start up a new thread after my psychiatrist appointment today. Off to a new start.

Simply put, he made the point that I am pressuring myself to do stuff far more quickly than what I thought I could. When this approach fails, it feeds back into the loop that was there before (the "i am not good enough", "I have limited time", "I have wasted my life" etc).

He said it was good I didn't go to hospital and avoided ending up there. This doesn't help. What does help is changing the approach etc.

It was a good appointment. I see him again in the morning and then maybe someone else next week.

So it's not entirely hopeless or lost now.

He thought that pressuring myself to go and get this visa would be the wrong decision, given my state of panic yesterday and also this morning.

He said that I need to hold off on pressuring myself. By saying "okay now that I am in Australia for a bit longer, I need to go and find a job quickly" because this is simply unhelpful. It's the wrong attitude and will only feed back into those loops.

So am I feeling more settled? Yes. Do I know what is next? No. Does this bother me? No.

I see my psychologist tomorrow afternoon. I will get something from my psychiatrist in the morning about all of this I think, which he said he can send off as part of the extension on the visa (which lasts for 2 years anyway). It's just a case of extending the timeframe for when I can receive it.

This would effect my chances of working in defence, mi6 etc but these are already off the table for me given my history anyway. The same is the case for the military and police. It does seem like some things are cancelled out because of my MH, but maybe they are things I was never keen on anyways.

That's a side issue for now.

Going to the UK - still a goal. It's a case of how I get there and WHAT I do when I get there. We have established that rocking up with no job or place to live is too chaotic. Especially based on my experience and degree background and skills. But the UK is a goal. My Psychiatrist said "Poland is always there" so I think it might be worthwhile sending them an email asking if I could be either placed on next year's list OR alternatively get some of my money back given the circumstances. Again, not my concern for now.

My concern at the moment is explaining all this to dad. My Psych spoke to my mum today too so she is in the loop. I think he will understand, he wants what is best for me. It takes some adjustment and time. But this is life and how we live it.

THanks forumites. See you a bit later today

Edit: I heard today that one of my old tutees that i helped in 2017 is working and is at uni. Doing well and studying. I joked that we should meet up for coffee and then i can get a job at the same place lol. So today has had a silver lining. This was the student who nearly quit school. But I can only take as much credit for what they achieved. Most of it was them

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In response to: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Hope today is a smooth one for you @MDT and you can hang in there and 'merge' with the crowd for a little longer. I think it's still only week 2, yes? And if you need to, tell yourself it's only for a month, you are nearly half way there. What have you got to lose by staying an extra 10-15 minutes? Also I agree that wanting to help others is an admirable desire, but actually doing it can be misconstrued by the recipient as having a superior attitude or condescending, especially if they are masking insecurities of their own. I made that mistake constantly when I was younger. Throughout life, not just at work, my policy is to wait to be asked to help (or at least I try to!). That way you know your intentions will be well received. I perceive you as very intelligent and likely to be very efficient in the workplace too, and you quite likely are getting your work done faster, but being a 'team player' as @TAB says is very important too. Good to see you have plenty of support and advice here. Take care xx

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Thanks @eth
🙂

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

@outlander @oceangirl @Shaz51 @Zoe7 @TAB @Bunniekins @BlueBay @Meowmy @Everan @Teej @Appleblossom @eudemonism @frog @eth @Gazza75 @Everan @Former-Member @Angels333 @Doglover @Sophia1 @saturnzoon @Faith-and-Hope @CheerBear @Former-Member @Molliex @Smc
@Ant7 @Adge @Former-Member @Owlunar @Queenie @utopia

Hey forumites

I am done for the week.

I was going to go to an event tonight. Walked there after I had finished. Not starting for 20 mins.

But then just walked out again. Lol.

I am simply too exhausted. Its the first time I have done full time hours for a solid week. Tbh i don't care too much that its taken it out of me.

I am actually happy I am relatively still in one piece.

Its been a good week over all I think. I have managed to stay sane.

I wasnt in the mood to be meeting new people. I think I made a mistake by saying I would go. But then I guess I can decide on these things myself.

I will likely go tomorrow maybe. An old friend invited me out to his birthday.

I think I am just simply growing up hey?

Going out for dinner anyway with parents and sister.

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Tbh its the first time for like 2 years i have actually bailed last minute on a social event. I guess that counts.

As i walked out i thought "isnt this just a safety behaviour?"

To walk out before getting there?

But then i think... not really. Just changing my mind.

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Trust your gut @MDT

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

You aren't a label @MDT 😎

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

@MDT hey Handling,think we all have to see how we feel when socialising.Not easy. Enjoy dinner with family. Tomorrow party will be good.

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

@MDT cannot put it better than @TABs and @Meowmy . Have a lovely dinner tonight 😄 and a super pea party tomorrow :p!

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Nobody does it better @Bunniekins lol 😎
https://youtu.be/SaV-6qerkqI

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

@TAB s I love this song :D. Havent heard it in years lol.

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