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A new start (kind of)

A new start (kind of)

Hi @Shaz51 @Zoe7 @outlander @TAB @Sam3 @utopia @Faith-and-Hope @Appleblossom @oceangirl @Sans911 @Snowie @Former-Member @soul @BryanaCamp @Former-Member @Bunniekins and whoever else is there in forumland

I have tagged some of you because we are speaking lots and some others haven't been around for long. If it's too much for you then that's okay I respect that. I won't take it personally.

I have decied to start up a new thread after my psychiatrist appointment today. Off to a new start.

Simply put, he made the point that I am pressuring myself to do stuff far more quickly than what I thought I could. When this approach fails, it feeds back into the loop that was there before (the "i am not good enough", "I have limited time", "I have wasted my life" etc).

He said it was good I didn't go to hospital and avoided ending up there. This doesn't help. What does help is changing the approach etc.

It was a good appointment. I see him again in the morning and then maybe someone else next week.

So it's not entirely hopeless or lost now.

He thought that pressuring myself to go and get this visa would be the wrong decision, given my state of panic yesterday and also this morning.

He said that I need to hold off on pressuring myself. By saying "okay now that I am in Australia for a bit longer, I need to go and find a job quickly" because this is simply unhelpful. It's the wrong attitude and will only feed back into those loops.

So am I feeling more settled? Yes. Do I know what is next? No. Does this bother me? No.

I see my psychologist tomorrow afternoon. I will get something from my psychiatrist in the morning about all of this I think, which he said he can send off as part of the extension on the visa (which lasts for 2 years anyway). It's just a case of extending the timeframe for when I can receive it.

This would effect my chances of working in defence, mi6 etc but these are already off the table for me given my history anyway. The same is the case for the military and police. It does seem like some things are cancelled out because of my MH, but maybe they are things I was never keen on anyways.

That's a side issue for now.

Going to the UK - still a goal. It's a case of how I get there and WHAT I do when I get there. We have established that rocking up with no job or place to live is too chaotic. Especially based on my experience and degree background and skills. But the UK is a goal. My Psychiatrist said "Poland is always there" so I think it might be worthwhile sending them an email asking if I could be either placed on next year's list OR alternatively get some of my money back given the circumstances. Again, not my concern for now.

My concern at the moment is explaining all this to dad. My Psych spoke to my mum today too so she is in the loop. I think he will understand, he wants what is best for me. It takes some adjustment and time. But this is life and how we live it.

THanks forumites. See you a bit later today

Edit: I heard today that one of my old tutees that i helped in 2017 is working and is at uni. Doing well and studying. I joked that we should meet up for coffee and then i can get a job at the same place lol. So today has had a silver lining. This was the student who nearly quit school. But I can only take as much credit for what they achieved. Most of it was them

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In response to: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

@TAB tell yourself the tradie is not coming to judge your house. There are short cuts to making a place look tidier - shove everything into the cupboards and put what doesn't fit into one of your rooms and shut the door!

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

pretty much what am doing @eth just making flat surfaces a bit more clear lol

In response to: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

I hope your hand is OK @MDT

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

@outlander @oceangirl @Shaz51 @Zoe7 @TAB @Bunniekins @BlueBay @Meowmy @Everan @Teej @Appleblossom @eudemonism @frog @eth @Gazza75 @Everan @Former-Member @Angels333 @Doglover @Sophia1 @saturnzoon @Faith-and-Hope @CheerBear @Former-Member @Molliex @Smc
@Ant7 @Adge @Former-Member @Owlunar @Queenie @utopia

Hey forumites.
I have finished work for the week.
I feel pretty demoralised tbh.
This week with my coworker threw me off. They were very prone to mood swings if they hadn't had a smoke. And then the next minute they were normal.
It's demoralising because it makes me think I am the incompetent one. Because I am still at the same location I was from the other day when I had to move during the working hours - due to a failure in communication - I am very self conscious while I'm at work. I hate upsetting Apple cart unnecessarily. But then I try to show initiative and do something helpful but I get shut down or eye rolls from this one colleague.
I think the reason it is throwing me off is because I'm trying to understand it and see if there is something I have done wrong. But idk. My anxiety is through the roof in those instances.
Sussing out who to talk to etc and such is half of it. The rest I am unsure of.
Because it is entry level government there seems to be a lot of "creating work for the sake of it" going on.
Perhaps that is a recipe for bad attitudes. But Im not sure.
I know some of you have struggled to understand work dynamics @BlueBay you have spoken about that before.
I am asking my dad for his thoughts as he started where I am working now - same work context and duties only 30 years ago.
I'm just trying to do my job and do it properly and yet that seems like it's causing problems for others. It's seemingly a Pathologically induced behaviour for those I am around atm... Where they just take a very bad attitude with them.
I ended up finding something else to do. Which was productive-ish.
My main role I am performing well in i think.
Though today there was confusion as to where I was meant to be because things are never clear. It seems like I do that and I tread on people's toes. For example I needed a roster and then I asked my colleague and it was like the end of the world. I got a different one. How am I meant to know?
But anyway. She is a weird one. Limited engagement is best.
Perhaps my shift in attitude towards work is vastly superior to where it used to be. And this is good, but also comes with different levels of tolerance for coworkers.
I'm a bit lost.

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

try and go with the flow @MDT these people have their own issues sounds and or have dead-ended there. try not to let it bother you, asking father is good idea

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

just smile and try and be helpful @MDT hopefully things settle down, might be people marking their turf. Darth Tab has 11 years in govt over 3 completely different jobs lol ok most recent one was 25 years ago. went to similar role thru labor hire recently it was beyond toxic work environment things are a lot more desperate in govt these days I imagine esp w corruption and nepotism etc

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

try and go with the flowmy @MDT

when do you work again xx

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

@MDT Hey Hamso, think agree with tabby, try to go with the flow. Be gentle with yourself and co workers. Slowly it will become clearer. Take care.

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Next week shaz @Shaz51
Same place. Same times.
Yeah @TAB Deadended I think is right.

But I do believe there is merit in this atm. Rather than stick it out and try to survive. I want to be observant and learn from what I see. To be a better human from it perhaps I guess.
It's not a dream job, but it's just a start. Gets me experience and gets me money. And it's not full time so that's helping my mood and attitude. I think I would've given up by now.

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Hope so @Meowmy
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