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A new start (kind of)

A new start (kind of)

Hi @Shaz51 @Zoe7 @outlander @TAB @Sam3 @utopia @Faith-and-Hope @Appleblossom @oceangirl @Sans911 @Snowie @Former-Member @soul @BryanaCamp @Former-Member @Bunniekins and whoever else is there in forumland

I have tagged some of you because we are speaking lots and some others haven't been around for long. If it's too much for you then that's okay I respect that. I won't take it personally.

I have decied to start up a new thread after my psychiatrist appointment today. Off to a new start.

Simply put, he made the point that I am pressuring myself to do stuff far more quickly than what I thought I could. When this approach fails, it feeds back into the loop that was there before (the "i am not good enough", "I have limited time", "I have wasted my life" etc).

He said it was good I didn't go to hospital and avoided ending up there. This doesn't help. What does help is changing the approach etc.

It was a good appointment. I see him again in the morning and then maybe someone else next week.

So it's not entirely hopeless or lost now.

He thought that pressuring myself to go and get this visa would be the wrong decision, given my state of panic yesterday and also this morning.

He said that I need to hold off on pressuring myself. By saying "okay now that I am in Australia for a bit longer, I need to go and find a job quickly" because this is simply unhelpful. It's the wrong attitude and will only feed back into those loops.

So am I feeling more settled? Yes. Do I know what is next? No. Does this bother me? No.

I see my psychologist tomorrow afternoon. I will get something from my psychiatrist in the morning about all of this I think, which he said he can send off as part of the extension on the visa (which lasts for 2 years anyway). It's just a case of extending the timeframe for when I can receive it.

This would effect my chances of working in defence, mi6 etc but these are already off the table for me given my history anyway. The same is the case for the military and police. It does seem like some things are cancelled out because of my MH, but maybe they are things I was never keen on anyways.

That's a side issue for now.

Going to the UK - still a goal. It's a case of how I get there and WHAT I do when I get there. We have established that rocking up with no job or place to live is too chaotic. Especially based on my experience and degree background and skills. But the UK is a goal. My Psychiatrist said "Poland is always there" so I think it might be worthwhile sending them an email asking if I could be either placed on next year's list OR alternatively get some of my money back given the circumstances. Again, not my concern for now.

My concern at the moment is explaining all this to dad. My Psych spoke to my mum today too so she is in the loop. I think he will understand, he wants what is best for me. It takes some adjustment and time. But this is life and how we live it.

THanks forumites. See you a bit later today

Edit: I heard today that one of my old tutees that i helped in 2017 is working and is at uni. Doing well and studying. I joked that we should meet up for coffee and then i can get a job at the same place lol. So today has had a silver lining. This was the student who nearly quit school. But I can only take as much credit for what they achieved. Most of it was them

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In response to: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Thanks @Shaz51 Shazo
Should be okay though I think

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

@MDT

Is he in a default pushy mode?

Is he disappointed or afraid?

Could it be worth asking him what he wants to achieve by yelling?

Why he cant just accept your needs.

I dont know - never had experience of relating to my father. If he is "not well" it could make things worse, but maybe dont let his energy push you around.

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Hi @MDT How did it go with your dad? @Appleblossom @Shaz51 @Zoe7 @TAB Hi guys how are you doin’?! Best wishes for a good night’s sleep @Shaz51 .

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

fingers and toes crossed @Sam3 , hope i sleep better tonight

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

yes, do tell @MDT hi @Sam3 just gorged myself on snacks here, then tv bed here, so nothing bad is good I guess. How are you going?

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Well you can walk that off @TAB . I’m thoroughly sick of myself but thanks for asking!

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

yes, tomorrow perhaps re walking @Sam3 think am trying to cocoon self if that's a thing re being sick of one's self lol Im going to have to get back to work soon, trying to delay it for some reason though

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Its hard @Appleblossom because i think he is cheating on mum. So thats always on my mind. I think he is in the closet about his sexuality. I think mum has explained most of my situation to him though. So that helps. He only just got home because the flight is delayed. Maybe speak at depth tomorrow about it all.

Hey @Sam3 @Shaz51 @TAB to you as well

I am also a bit sad ab9ut kissing out on the poland thing, because i was looking forward to meeting my friend again. She was really quirky and cute. We got along really well. We are zoeaking on facebook a lot since last year but this is what it is and how it has to be. It is simply too much to try and organise in a short space, especially finding a job and place to live. I dont regret my decision. I just feel a bit sad is all.

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

so is it all off now @MDT ?

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Pretty much @TAB

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