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A new start (kind of)

A new start (kind of)

Hi @Shaz51 @Zoe7 @outlander @TAB @Sam3 @utopia @Faith-and-Hope @Appleblossom @oceangirl @Sans911 @Snowie @Former-Member @soul @BryanaCamp @Former-Member @Bunniekins and whoever else is there in forumland

I have tagged some of you because we are speaking lots and some others haven't been around for long. If it's too much for you then that's okay I respect that. I won't take it personally.

I have decied to start up a new thread after my psychiatrist appointment today. Off to a new start.

Simply put, he made the point that I am pressuring myself to do stuff far more quickly than what I thought I could. When this approach fails, it feeds back into the loop that was there before (the "i am not good enough", "I have limited time", "I have wasted my life" etc).

He said it was good I didn't go to hospital and avoided ending up there. This doesn't help. What does help is changing the approach etc.

It was a good appointment. I see him again in the morning and then maybe someone else next week.

So it's not entirely hopeless or lost now.

He thought that pressuring myself to go and get this visa would be the wrong decision, given my state of panic yesterday and also this morning.

He said that I need to hold off on pressuring myself. By saying "okay now that I am in Australia for a bit longer, I need to go and find a job quickly" because this is simply unhelpful. It's the wrong attitude and will only feed back into those loops.

So am I feeling more settled? Yes. Do I know what is next? No. Does this bother me? No.

I see my psychologist tomorrow afternoon. I will get something from my psychiatrist in the morning about all of this I think, which he said he can send off as part of the extension on the visa (which lasts for 2 years anyway). It's just a case of extending the timeframe for when I can receive it.

This would effect my chances of working in defence, mi6 etc but these are already off the table for me given my history anyway. The same is the case for the military and police. It does seem like some things are cancelled out because of my MH, but maybe they are things I was never keen on anyways.

That's a side issue for now.

Going to the UK - still a goal. It's a case of how I get there and WHAT I do when I get there. We have established that rocking up with no job or place to live is too chaotic. Especially based on my experience and degree background and skills. But the UK is a goal. My Psychiatrist said "Poland is always there" so I think it might be worthwhile sending them an email asking if I could be either placed on next year's list OR alternatively get some of my money back given the circumstances. Again, not my concern for now.

My concern at the moment is explaining all this to dad. My Psych spoke to my mum today too so she is in the loop. I think he will understand, he wants what is best for me. It takes some adjustment and time. But this is life and how we live it.

THanks forumites. See you a bit later today

Edit: I heard today that one of my old tutees that i helped in 2017 is working and is at uni. Doing well and studying. I joked that we should meet up for coffee and then i can get a job at the same place lol. So today has had a silver lining. This was the student who nearly quit school. But I can only take as much credit for what they achieved. Most of it was them

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In response to: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

I have supported most of the recent posts. @MDT I totally agree.

I have known you for a couple years at least ... online ... and you do keep keeping on.

You keep on with insight and intelligent reflective self regulation. It is not an easy world to live in with all its complications and many different standards ...

@eudemonism was right about not needing to be an elite athlete. I have a similar situation with my son, as he sees himself as a slacker too ... and sometime he does ... but when he works it like a Trojan ... self managing time and effort is a huge THING.

We know it pays off ... and dangling the right carrot ... can be that arvo off.

I took tonight off ... I was supposed to go and see and friend for fun ... but really was not up for it. Better off being home alone with cat computer and music. It all depends....

@MDT

Hugs Mate

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Hmm fiar enough @Zoe7 @Meowmy @Appleblossom

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Hey @MDT hope you feel the benefit of the afternoon off. You work hard and some down time is a necessity.

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

🐸 @frog

In response to: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

I found this poem recently and wanted to share it here with you forumites

If you’re going to try, go all the way.

Otherwise, don’t even start.

If you're going to try, go all the way.

This could mean losing girlfriends, wives, relatives, jobs and maybe even your mind.

It could mean not eating for three or four days.

It could mean freezing on a park bench.

It could mean jail.

It could mean derision, mockery, isolation.

Isolation is the gift.

All the others are a test of your endurance, of how much you really want to do it.

And, you’ll do it, despite rejection and the worst odds.

And it will be better than anything else you can imagine.

If you’re going to try, go all the way.

There is no other feeling like that.

You will be alone with the gods, and the nights will flame with fire.

DO IT. DO IT. DO IT. All the way

You will ride life straight to perfect laughter. It’s the only good fight there is.



@outlander @oceangirl @Shaz51 @Zoe7 @TAB @Bunniekins @BlueBay @Meowmy @Everan @Teej @Appleblossom @eudemonism @frog @eth @Gazza75 @Everan @Former-Member @Angels333 @Doglover @Sophia1 @saturnzoon @Faith-and-Hope @CheerBear @Former-Member

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Ummmm ...... I appreciate that it is a poem @MDT . I also appreciate the meaning b hind and in it ...... but I would caution against some of the “it might mean”s suggested in it, in regard to safety boundaries.

The prom is talking about doing things whole-heartedly, and that I appreciate 😊

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

@MDT take care, Hamsolo, the world is full of traps, caution helps.

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Hello @MDT

Some great supportive responses to you..

Some of us are so very quick to judge ourselves against such ridiculously high standards ...

at the very same time offering support and understanding to others...advising them to step back...stop overthinking...not to have such high expectations of themselves...

Why do we not then listen to ourselves???

Human beings are such odd creatures aren't they..

love the above poem...am going to save that one..

Sophia💚

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

it's a Charles Bukowski poem @Sophia1

I came across it recently.

It's tone is one that I like and appreciate. "Go all the way" and be an individual.

"You will be alone with the gods, and the nights will flame with fire."

How are you?


In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

over here @Owlunar my friend
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