FORUMS

Connect with people who understand what you are going through, seek advice and surround yourself with support. We're free, anonymous, and professionally moderated 24/7.

  • 47,612Members
  • 1,358,869Posts
  • 1,400,000Visitors
Our stories

A new start (kind of)

A new start (kind of)

Hi @Shaz51 @Zoe7 @outlander @TAB @Sam3 @utopia @Faith-and-Hope @Appleblossom @oceangirl @Sans911 @Snowie @Former-Member @soul @BryanaCamp @Former-Member @Bunniekins and whoever else is there in forumland

I have tagged some of you because we are speaking lots and some others haven't been around for long. If it's too much for you then that's okay I respect that. I won't take it personally.

I have decied to start up a new thread after my psychiatrist appointment today. Off to a new start.

Simply put, he made the point that I am pressuring myself to do stuff far more quickly than what I thought I could. When this approach fails, it feeds back into the loop that was there before (the "i am not good enough", "I have limited time", "I have wasted my life" etc).

He said it was good I didn't go to hospital and avoided ending up there. This doesn't help. What does help is changing the approach etc.

It was a good appointment. I see him again in the morning and then maybe someone else next week.

So it's not entirely hopeless or lost now.

He thought that pressuring myself to go and get this visa would be the wrong decision, given my state of panic yesterday and also this morning.

He said that I need to hold off on pressuring myself. By saying "okay now that I am in Australia for a bit longer, I need to go and find a job quickly" because this is simply unhelpful. It's the wrong attitude and will only feed back into those loops.

So am I feeling more settled? Yes. Do I know what is next? No. Does this bother me? No.

I see my psychologist tomorrow afternoon. I will get something from my psychiatrist in the morning about all of this I think, which he said he can send off as part of the extension on the visa (which lasts for 2 years anyway). It's just a case of extending the timeframe for when I can receive it.

This would effect my chances of working in defence, mi6 etc but these are already off the table for me given my history anyway. The same is the case for the military and police. It does seem like some things are cancelled out because of my MH, but maybe they are things I was never keen on anyways.

That's a side issue for now.

Going to the UK - still a goal. It's a case of how I get there and WHAT I do when I get there. We have established that rocking up with no job or place to live is too chaotic. Especially based on my experience and degree background and skills. But the UK is a goal. My Psychiatrist said "Poland is always there" so I think it might be worthwhile sending them an email asking if I could be either placed on next year's list OR alternatively get some of my money back given the circumstances. Again, not my concern for now.

My concern at the moment is explaining all this to dad. My Psych spoke to my mum today too so she is in the loop. I think he will understand, he wants what is best for me. It takes some adjustment and time. But this is life and how we live it.

THanks forumites. See you a bit later today

Edit: I heard today that one of my old tutees that i helped in 2017 is working and is at uni. Doing well and studying. I joked that we should meet up for coffee and then i can get a job at the same place lol. So today has had a silver lining. This was the student who nearly quit school. But I can only take as much credit for what they achieved. Most of it was them

7645 replies

3,041 - 3,050 of 7,645

In response to: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

@MDT Everyone has to find their own path in life buddy and sometimes those that seem to have more have underlying issues that they are dealing with as well. We can only judge by what they openly present and often that is the positive them - whilst in the background there may be more that they do not present with. I find envy to be an empty emotion myself - there is so much more in my life to deal with without worrying about what others have or have not got in their lives as compared to myself. Maybe that is years of experience on my behalf but I don't have enough energy in my life to envy others - need to use that energy to deal with my own life and how I can move forward myself.

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Yeah exactly. @Zoe7
I know I stopped being envious about three years back. It helped me focus on my own life and fix things.
I'm definitely in a clearer headspace these days.
I just wish it'd never happened idk. That things were better

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Focussing on your own life is a real positive @MDT and a major step forward in itself. You have come so far in the time I have known you and yes I sound like a proud parent - I am sure your parents are proud of how far you have come too

I firmly believe that when your time comes you will not only embrace it with confidence and passion but excel in your life too. I believe in you buddy - always have

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

You are a good friend @Zoe7

🙂

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Ditto @MDT

In response to: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

No problems @MDT . How r u doing my friend?

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Hey @Doglover

How's it going?
I am watching tour de france atm. Will read book soon too.

I saw next doors dog the other day and I remembered you because the first time you joined the forum was the same day I took care of next doors dog. Lol.


In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Hey @MDT , grt that u saw next doors dog the other day - he wld have bn happy. Funny that u think of me when u see him, that's cool...

Things pretty tough this end Hams, but that's pretty much par for the course.

Take care and enjoy ur book.

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

@Doglover 🙂

In response to: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

@MDT plese don't tag me on this thread in the future.

3,041 - 3,050 of 7,645