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A new start (kind of)

A new start (kind of)

Hi @Shaz51 @Zoe7 @outlander @TAB @Sam3 @utopia @Faith-and-Hope @Appleblossom @oceangirl @Sans911 @Snowie @Former-Member @soul @BryanaCamp @Former-Member @Bunniekins and whoever else is there in forumland

I have tagged some of you because we are speaking lots and some others haven't been around for long. If it's too much for you then that's okay I respect that. I won't take it personally.

I have decied to start up a new thread after my psychiatrist appointment today. Off to a new start.

Simply put, he made the point that I am pressuring myself to do stuff far more quickly than what I thought I could. When this approach fails, it feeds back into the loop that was there before (the "i am not good enough", "I have limited time", "I have wasted my life" etc).

He said it was good I didn't go to hospital and avoided ending up there. This doesn't help. What does help is changing the approach etc.

It was a good appointment. I see him again in the morning and then maybe someone else next week.

So it's not entirely hopeless or lost now.

He thought that pressuring myself to go and get this visa would be the wrong decision, given my state of panic yesterday and also this morning.

He said that I need to hold off on pressuring myself. By saying "okay now that I am in Australia for a bit longer, I need to go and find a job quickly" because this is simply unhelpful. It's the wrong attitude and will only feed back into those loops.

So am I feeling more settled? Yes. Do I know what is next? No. Does this bother me? No.

I see my psychologist tomorrow afternoon. I will get something from my psychiatrist in the morning about all of this I think, which he said he can send off as part of the extension on the visa (which lasts for 2 years anyway). It's just a case of extending the timeframe for when I can receive it.

This would effect my chances of working in defence, mi6 etc but these are already off the table for me given my history anyway. The same is the case for the military and police. It does seem like some things are cancelled out because of my MH, but maybe they are things I was never keen on anyways.

That's a side issue for now.

Going to the UK - still a goal. It's a case of how I get there and WHAT I do when I get there. We have established that rocking up with no job or place to live is too chaotic. Especially based on my experience and degree background and skills. But the UK is a goal. My Psychiatrist said "Poland is always there" so I think it might be worthwhile sending them an email asking if I could be either placed on next year's list OR alternatively get some of my money back given the circumstances. Again, not my concern for now.

My concern at the moment is explaining all this to dad. My Psych spoke to my mum today too so she is in the loop. I think he will understand, he wants what is best for me. It takes some adjustment and time. But this is life and how we live it.

THanks forumites. See you a bit later today

Edit: I heard today that one of my old tutees that i helped in 2017 is working and is at uni. Doing well and studying. I joked that we should meet up for coffee and then i can get a job at the same place lol. So today has had a silver lining. This was the student who nearly quit school. But I can only take as much credit for what they achieved. Most of it was them

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In response to: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Fingers crossed you’ll have a job by this time tomorrow @TAB even if it’s not your ‘favourite’ site. I remember being really cross with a previous employer because they stuffed up the sep cert with the wrong reason stated (no I did NOT resign, rather they did not continue the contract & despite being in each other’s line of vision I’d had to approach the boss late in the day with the coming weeks client appointments booked into my electronic diary by his 2IC but not told to whether to turn up or not the next day). @Zoe7 To add insult to injury another staff member had a birthday so he decided to pretend it was also my farewell afternoon tea. Spineless, disingenuous ..... Anyway back to you- sorry you’re not physically well atm @TAB - working may therefore be tricky although it sounds like it’s a necessary evil.. Any more thoughts about a cert iv or moving to a city?

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

No money so no move no cert 4 @Sam3 ..um yeah least favourite site ever plus these people probably know me and dont rate me. .. which would makeme Really happy. I have narrowed Company down to 1 most likely and they are arrogant rude overbearing bullying abusive etc have worked under them before. Would be interesting if they wanted me. Because in no way do I want them. plus am going back to drs asap something really not right

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

hi gang @MDT how are you travelling today, taking it easy?

@TAB your situation sounds so tough, sitting with you. I've been unemployed for 7 years & it's a hard hole to dig myself out of, just one step at a time.

@Sam3 don't beat yourself up too much - let those ruminations go! You're a good mum.

@Shaz51 hi how are you today?

@Zoe7 yes so glad my kitty cat is picking up, he's my best buddy

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

hi @BryanaCamp yeah, research has been around for years that even after 2 weeks off work it's a slippery slope .. anyway .. had some big gains yest, got separation cert from work, was avoiding asking cos too embarrassed, but bills owing and no work is reality anyway, as someone on tv said the other day, 'good' unemployment figures still leave at least 600,000 people behind ... ok only times not on dole were 3years, 3 years and 4years(permanent jobs) ok and 4 years when had lots of casual work so out of 38 year work life, was either studying or un/semi employed for .. 20 years .. wow.. didnt realise

In response to: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

hey @Sam3 brunch was good yeah. It was nice to see where my old student is up to now. She is doing well, at university and working full time too. About to start with Lifeline I think. She has also had her own mental health struggles. Busy but good. I am happy to see this progress. Especially for someone who was told to go to tafe because she "had no potential". Proves that attitude can trump anything really 🙂

I read what you said about your kids and the school. I went to a private school and my sister went to a public. Biggest difference? Attitude of the teachers. I think sometimes parents (no accusing you of this btw) expect that kids will be well behaved at a private school simply because "it's a private school". The real difference lies in the teachers. Kids will always screw about, regardless of whether it's private or public. Sounds like your kids are just going through the motions though. All the best with that. Let them do their thing. Your youngest reminds me of my cousin who nearly got sent to a private school lol.

Go well my friend 🙂

Hi @BryanaCamp I guess so yeh. I am taking it easy. Today I plan on just looking about job sites/linkedin for stuff I am capable of doing. Not going to hold my breathe or stress myself out. If I can apply for just one thing in this entire week then that's a win to me.

Hey @TAB @Shaz51 (hope you are okay with all that is going on) @Zoe7 @outlander @Appleblossom

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

hi @MDT perhaps Tafe is an option for you? ok what about if you applied for 1 'real' job this week and 5 or so 'crappy' ones like nightfill or whatever. Would get you out of the house and help to get socialised. Just a thought. and if you dont like it, just walk, and no worse off. might be lots better off though..

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Good thinking @TAB

I might look into this. I'm set to do a gig with the mental health charity so that's going to be useful for me.

I spoke to sane chat yesterday about reaching out to that contact of mine. So I'm going to do that anyway. Just to catch up and see if there are any opportunities.

At the moment I'm not too worried about staying at home. Just getting a balance is important I think.

How are you today?

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

yeah volunteering can be motivating, well at bare minimum gets you out of house and get to meet new people. I volunteered at a hospital before went off to mines. was in pay office then medical records. should have got a job out of it, was just so easy and boring. nice people though and guess I got to see more things even if mines got me nowhere in the end.

yeah am ok. Had an hours walk already, check my posts in tabalugas ? anyway things more positive than yesterday, got separation cert for centrelink from work and registered for work somewhere else. its given me hope and sometimes that's enough @MDT

In response to: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Experience at anything is always better than nothing on resume crap jobs help get good jobs cos shows discipline motivation etc @MDT

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

indeed @TAB
Most of my resume is volunteering and basic work (tutoring)

So here's hoping it bridges a gap. Time to email that person methinks
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