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A new start (kind of)

A new start (kind of)

Hi @Shaz51 @Zoe7 @outlander @TAB @Sam3 @utopia @Faith-and-Hope @Appleblossom @oceangirl @Sans911 @Snowie @Former-Member @soul @BryanaCamp @Former-Member @Bunniekins and whoever else is there in forumland

I have tagged some of you because we are speaking lots and some others haven't been around for long. If it's too much for you then that's okay I respect that. I won't take it personally.

I have decied to start up a new thread after my psychiatrist appointment today. Off to a new start.

Simply put, he made the point that I am pressuring myself to do stuff far more quickly than what I thought I could. When this approach fails, it feeds back into the loop that was there before (the "i am not good enough", "I have limited time", "I have wasted my life" etc).

He said it was good I didn't go to hospital and avoided ending up there. This doesn't help. What does help is changing the approach etc.

It was a good appointment. I see him again in the morning and then maybe someone else next week.

So it's not entirely hopeless or lost now.

He thought that pressuring myself to go and get this visa would be the wrong decision, given my state of panic yesterday and also this morning.

He said that I need to hold off on pressuring myself. By saying "okay now that I am in Australia for a bit longer, I need to go and find a job quickly" because this is simply unhelpful. It's the wrong attitude and will only feed back into those loops.

So am I feeling more settled? Yes. Do I know what is next? No. Does this bother me? No.

I see my psychologist tomorrow afternoon. I will get something from my psychiatrist in the morning about all of this I think, which he said he can send off as part of the extension on the visa (which lasts for 2 years anyway). It's just a case of extending the timeframe for when I can receive it.

This would effect my chances of working in defence, mi6 etc but these are already off the table for me given my history anyway. The same is the case for the military and police. It does seem like some things are cancelled out because of my MH, but maybe they are things I was never keen on anyways.

That's a side issue for now.

Going to the UK - still a goal. It's a case of how I get there and WHAT I do when I get there. We have established that rocking up with no job or place to live is too chaotic. Especially based on my experience and degree background and skills. But the UK is a goal. My Psychiatrist said "Poland is always there" so I think it might be worthwhile sending them an email asking if I could be either placed on next year's list OR alternatively get some of my money back given the circumstances. Again, not my concern for now.

My concern at the moment is explaining all this to dad. My Psych spoke to my mum today too so she is in the loop. I think he will understand, he wants what is best for me. It takes some adjustment and time. But this is life and how we live it.

THanks forumites. See you a bit later today

Edit: I heard today that one of my old tutees that i helped in 2017 is working and is at uni. Doing well and studying. I joked that we should meet up for coffee and then i can get a job at the same place lol. So today has had a silver lining. This was the student who nearly quit school. But I can only take as much credit for what they achieved. Most of it was them

7645 replies

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In response to: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

sounds good @MDT

In response to: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

So good to read your posts @MDT

Sounds as if you are doing well internally, regardless of the work situation. Cos the reality is once, in the workforce, there is still a lot of that inner work to do.

High FIve

Thats good point about rules @TAB

Good rules help a lot.

Keeping them relevant and good takes a little reflection, but need not be honerous if one is not stuck on rules.

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

https://youtu.be/c9lh7lqZojc

@Appleblossom @MDT

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

hi @MDT glad you're in a good headspace & your psych was helpful. hi @TAB how's it going?

it's awesome you went to the movies with your friends @MDT . I reckon life can't be all work and no play. You've got your job searching and long term goals that you're working on each day, full time job. It's good to have relaxing social time too when you feel like it.

Thanks for your support with my recent trauma with mean colleague at volunteering situation, I'm feeling a lot better about it now & have simple strategies to cope with a sociopath. Your support means a lot.

I have been withdrawing a lot recently, trying to be neat & tidy in my behaviour & go for walks. Tonight I'm going to have dinner with some friends. I'm going to try to be calm and normal, will let you know how it goes!

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

@TAB @MDT

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JEpsKnWZrJ8

@BryanaCamp

I love that you wrote about

trying to be calm and normal

I have done that too ... it works some of the time

In response to: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Also impressed at where you are at @MDT and also how you have dealt with all the work stuff. Speaking to you psych has seemed to clarify a little of that for you and that is positive. Keep doing what you are doing buddy. Belief and patience are both needed but we are here to remind you of those when you need it.

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

haha @TAB

I actually know this song. From a comedian i watch who pointed it out.

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

I remember it from the radio @MDT lol

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

@MDT@TAB

Bummer

I actually posted a different talk than I intended.

Here it is

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vqBPZR63vfA

It is about workplace cultures and different CEOs.

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

i think he has a point but I cant do 20 minutes of softly spoken monotone @Appleblossom

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