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A new start (kind of)

A new start (kind of)

Hi @Shaz51 @Zoe7 @outlander @TAB @Sam3 @utopia @Faith-and-Hope @Appleblossom @oceangirl @Sans911 @Snowie @Former-Member @soul @BryanaCamp @Former-Member @Bunniekins and whoever else is there in forumland

I have tagged some of you because we are speaking lots and some others haven't been around for long. If it's too much for you then that's okay I respect that. I won't take it personally.

I have decied to start up a new thread after my psychiatrist appointment today. Off to a new start.

Simply put, he made the point that I am pressuring myself to do stuff far more quickly than what I thought I could. When this approach fails, it feeds back into the loop that was there before (the "i am not good enough", "I have limited time", "I have wasted my life" etc).

He said it was good I didn't go to hospital and avoided ending up there. This doesn't help. What does help is changing the approach etc.

It was a good appointment. I see him again in the morning and then maybe someone else next week.

So it's not entirely hopeless or lost now.

He thought that pressuring myself to go and get this visa would be the wrong decision, given my state of panic yesterday and also this morning.

He said that I need to hold off on pressuring myself. By saying "okay now that I am in Australia for a bit longer, I need to go and find a job quickly" because this is simply unhelpful. It's the wrong attitude and will only feed back into those loops.

So am I feeling more settled? Yes. Do I know what is next? No. Does this bother me? No.

I see my psychologist tomorrow afternoon. I will get something from my psychiatrist in the morning about all of this I think, which he said he can send off as part of the extension on the visa (which lasts for 2 years anyway). It's just a case of extending the timeframe for when I can receive it.

This would effect my chances of working in defence, mi6 etc but these are already off the table for me given my history anyway. The same is the case for the military and police. It does seem like some things are cancelled out because of my MH, but maybe they are things I was never keen on anyways.

That's a side issue for now.

Going to the UK - still a goal. It's a case of how I get there and WHAT I do when I get there. We have established that rocking up with no job or place to live is too chaotic. Especially based on my experience and degree background and skills. But the UK is a goal. My Psychiatrist said "Poland is always there" so I think it might be worthwhile sending them an email asking if I could be either placed on next year's list OR alternatively get some of my money back given the circumstances. Again, not my concern for now.

My concern at the moment is explaining all this to dad. My Psych spoke to my mum today too so she is in the loop. I think he will understand, he wants what is best for me. It takes some adjustment and time. But this is life and how we live it.

THanks forumites. See you a bit later today

Edit: I heard today that one of my old tutees that i helped in 2017 is working and is at uni. Doing well and studying. I joked that we should meet up for coffee and then i can get a job at the same place lol. So today has had a silver lining. This was the student who nearly quit school. But I can only take as much credit for what they achieved. Most of it was them

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In response to: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Yeah @TAB for me it was a gf from work, then another gf ... but not really me.

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

I seem to find my own stuff @Appleblossom

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Yes a lot of people do that. @TAB

I was too busy working and studying back then .... I did not have time to go looking for entertainment for myself ... just mainly fitting in with others ...

Now I am old and ugly I have more opinions.

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

ha ha whatever works @Appleblossom sometimes I cant imagine how I did things only 12 months ago re attitudes and well risk taking and enjoyment etc I guess opinions can be a reaction to whats going on around you and how it affects you

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Hey forumites @outlander @Appleblossom @TAB @Zoe7 @oceangirl @BlueBay @BryanaCamp @Bunniekins

I am off to the psych today. I plan on raising this issue with employment with him. I have done so before. But I want to focus on it and maybe even talk about negative experiences I've had in the past. Just unravel a bit of it and see how it goes. Tell him about my two applications per day rule as well.

I also want to talk about how I can improve my self belief and feel better about myself going into interviews etc.

Anyways. Hope you have a good day

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

rules can take the heat off @MDT if in doubt .. refer to ..the rule

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

hope the day turns out alright for you @MDT

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Good luck with you specialist appointment Hams @MDT

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Good luck with tour appt @MDT ❤️

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

had my appointment
@outlander @Appleblossom @TAB @Zoe7 @oceangirl @BlueBay @BryanaCamp @Bunniekins

Overall it was good. I addressed the stuff I had concerns over yesterday. I think it was more of a vent than anything else. But some of it came from a place where I was genuinely annoyed.

Two takes aways from the session:
- If i can't put a face to thoughts or feelings, then that's all they are
- anxiety and stress are the result of a misuse of imagination

Both of these little axioms sum up my session.

I have also narrowed down my career/work situation. There are two elements to it. The first is the nuts and bolts of a work - so finding a job. The second is focusing on projects, networking events, people that are more in line with my long term goals of government and international relations.

For now, I have applied to three things today. In the space of 60 mins. They were all the same area kind of, so I simply used the same REsume and I didn't need a cover letter. So that was good.
My weekly total is now at 7, when the goal was 2 per day.
For the rest of the day I am going to do some more searching for both projects and networking and also for jobs.

My psych is impressed with where I am at. I just need to be patient and also treat myself in a way that encourages respect and improvement. Nothing more nothing less.
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