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Living and loving someone with MI presents relationship challenges and often others cannot see why we chose to stay with our partners.
Being mindful of not intruding on others stories I thought having a thread where we can share tips and encourage one another would be of value.
In response to: Partners who chose to stay for the long haul
MrsjonesSenior Contributor
Thank you @Former-Member
I will be with him every moment until I can get him into hospital hopeful tomorrow. Calling our local mental health services tomorrow for help. Mr Jones was not interesting in calling lifeline tonight even know i insisted.
I won't be getting much sleep tonight.
As for help myself, no I currently don't have any outlets for that unfortunately besides the lovely people on this forum.
Thanks again. I wish it wasn't so hard all the time.
In response to: Re: Partners who chose to stay for the long haul
DeterminedSenior Contributor
@Mrsjones how are you today?
Thinking of you.
In response to: Re: Partners who chose to stay for the long haul
MrsjonesSenior Contributor
In response to: Re: Partners who chose to stay for the long haul
DeterminedSenior Contributor
@Mrsjones Have been in that position far too many times (sitting is a hospital waiting for admission) + deflated and going with the flow so really feeling for you at the moment. At least I was able to visit.
Trust the admission process goes smoothly as is possible.
In response to: Partners who chose to stay for the long haul
ScooSenior Contributor
Thanks for your contribution @Mrsjones it's really helps to know other carers struggle with similar issues. I hear you and I care sister. I think many carers who stay for the long haul become resilient people and we need to keep reminding ourselves of that. Hang in there and have faith and hope that we can do this 💕
In response to: Re: Partners who chose to stay for the long haul
Faith-and-HopeSenior Contributor
💖 @Mrsjones .....
In response to: Re: Partners who chose to stay for the long haul
CLAContributor
Good evening everyone. There’s so many names I can’t remember them all sorry! But hi to you all.
I’ve been meaning to check in here much sooner but then the old covid situation happened and well we all know how that’s going. I’m in healthcare so it’s been full on at times. Anyway, I was going to post to say husband had really taken on the home schooling well and was really supportive of me and my work and everything was hunky dory but as usual the beer makes an appearance and then the belligerent behaviour starts. Last night it happened. This morning I said I’m not interested in being in a relationship with someone who behaves like that. Blah blah blah he apologises but sure enough the same thing happened tonight! Although he really outdid himself tonight. In front of our children he said “well you better pick which one. If we’re going to break up you’re going to have to pick which kid you want. You’re not taking both off me”. So needless to say my 9 year old has been distraught all evening. I’ve had a very honest conversation with my son on how I feel about his dad and why he makes me feel sad etc but he’s a born worrier like me and I know this will affect him greatly. I’m so angry at my husband for doing this. He doesn’t even realise how he is behaving. Before this kicked off this evening, I noticed him slurring some words while he was talking. He would just deny it if I mentioned it but this is the point he gets to, but meanwhile thinks he’s behaving in a perfectly acceptable way. What I said earlier is true - I am not interested in being in a relationship with someone who behaves like that, but I feel like I’m stuck with him. At least till the kids leave home!
I don’t expect solutions, this is more of a rant than anything. Thanks for reading. xx
In response to: Re: Partners who chose to stay for the long haul
Faith-and-HopeSenior Contributor
Hearing you @CLA .... it wasn't beer, but other addictions and obnoxious behaviour along with it ..... and trying to take one of my kids. It really sucks to find the person you invested yourself in turns out this way ..... but there are others in this hard place here too ..... sitting with you in the rant, and walking quietly along with you heart-wise.
Hugs incoming ..... 💕💕💕
In response to: Re: Partners who chose to stay for the long haul
Jay-eSenior Contributor
How's everyone holding up? @Mrsjones @Scoo @CLA @Faith-and-Hope ??? Pandemic is kinda kicking my ass right now. I know I'm lucky because I work in healthcare and still have a job and a roof over our heads and food... But MsJ isn't able to work due to social distancing so we have a depressive episode with no outlet. It's hard to stay upbeat and on top of things right now when her depression is an obnoxious, cold monster
In response to: Re: Partners who chose to stay for the long haul
ScooSenior Contributor
Hi everyone reading.
@Jay-e @CLA@MrsjonesFeeling for you and your current struggles. Caring for someone who is dual diagnosis is a really bad situation to be in especially when they are abusive. I am fortunate hubby doesn't use alcohol or drugs. In the past there have been some instances when I feared him but then he started working for a domestic violence service and it really shined the light on his behaviour and he has never punched a wall since, and the gaslighting completely stopped.
On a positive note he has started counselling, really likes the psychologist, and his GP is supportive and is seeing him weekly until he sees a significant improvement. He is even open minded about medication if his mental health doesn't significantly improve. I'm feeling more hopeful now.
Take care everyone ❤️
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Help us push aside the stigma and discrimination surrounding complex mental health and change the way people talk about, and care for, mental illness.
SANE acknowledges the Traditional Owners of Country throughout Australia and recognises the continuing connection to lands, waters and communities. We pay our respect to Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander cultures; and to Elders past and present.
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