Decluttering and home maintenance

hello @Determined , @Former-Member , @Former-Member , @Smc , @Anastasia , @Adge , @FindingStrength , @Appleblossom , @Emelia8

well no work today

( nbn took nearly all day

as we had a short in out phone 😞

finally have our phone and internet back ✔

and also have thrown some boxes and stuff in the bin ✔✔✔

@Shaz51a bit more done = 👍

Thanks @Former-Member , @Former-Member

Throwing put a few more things,, but giving Mr shaz a rest from it at the moment

Too much too soon is no good for him

No need to put any pressure on yourself @Former-Member there are no "shoulds" or time limits.

Framing or making a collage of some of their pictures, making a quilt out of their clothes, choosing to keep more treasured items, letting go of broken items or ones that bring bad memories rather than happy ones are just a few of the many ways that other parents deal with the items that belonged to their children.

Are you ok @Appleblossom xox

Oh dear maybe that memory wall pic was not good to share after all. Thought faces were small enough not to be identifiable, but then they blow up in the post ... sigh. Having it all on some digital photos seems gives me permission to dismantle it when I move bedrooms. Put a photo of my grandson up and more neutral things.

I am alright. @Shaz51 Thank you for checking in.

You are a good friend too. I have been writing a eulogy for my piano teacher friend. No stranger to grief, but focussing on a good grief this time.

@Former-Member, @Former-Member, @Appleblossom, our church has been doing an online bible study about grief. It's been really helpful being able to share our experiences, because all of us have experienced grief in one form or another. Some it's the loss of someone really close, for us it's more the grief of seeing our Older Daughter's life getting so shredded by MI, and the domino effect that's had on the rest of our family.

One friend in the group was talking about the teddy bear she'd made at the request of her teenage daughter from one of her husband's shirts- they lost him earlier this year. Others were talking about the idea of making memory cushions or quilts from the person's clothes. I've made little patchwork "memory pieces" like brooches, but they've been more about memories of childhood, or occasions like weddings.

I've got some things I'll probably never "declutter", because they belonged to loved family members. A few things that belonged to a favourite Great Uncle, some things that belonged to grandparents. I never knew my Mum's parents, because they'd both died long before I was born, so having some objects connected with them feels like a link to missing family. They're mostly, as @Former-Member suggested, "happy memory" pieces, but we've also had the odd thing of discovering a few sad family stories, and the odd "skeleton in the cupboard" while we've been working through my parents' house (and as a result, chasing up some family history online). I'm not really sorry to have found the "darker" pieces of the history puzzle, because they're all part of where I come from, and time gives a bit of distance to make them easier to reconcile.