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Trying to be happy, isn’t working

Trying to be happy, isn’t working

I really try hard to face life positively, but it just isn’t working. I don’t feel physically well, though there is nothing specifically wrong with me. I have had long bouts of depression since my early twenties, and I am back there now for the last three years. The black dog has now been joined by severe anxiety and due to some very traumatic events that left me without mt career of 50 years I now have PTSD. This has only been recognised recently. I have no interest in friends or family. Have no money have had to move home and this been another trauma for me that I can’t seem to move past.

I live with my youngest son who is 35 and has his own mh ussues and can be very difficult.i constantly think about death as my only option. But I just want to be happy, not deleteriously so, just happy. I have no partner and still grieve for my husband who died many years ago.

I can find nothing enriching in life

That is enough for now. Peri

468 replies

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In response to: Trying to be happy, isn’t working

Re: Trying to be happy, isn’t working

how are you my friend @Peri

In response to: Trying to be happy, isn’t working

Re: Trying to be happy, isn’t working

Hello and.hugs @Peri 👋🤗

It's been a while I hope you are well?

In response to: Re: Trying to be happy, isn’t working

Re: Trying to be happy, isn’t working

Dear @Anastasia @Shaz51 @outlander @Eve7 @Emelia8 ,,

you are right, I haven’t been here for a while. I read along though and look at posts.

I have been very up and down and my anxiety is very high, but the depression is not so bad.

a little over a week ago, we lost one of our dogs. Our Maggie died at home after an illness. It was very distressing, especially for my son, he had her from a new born pup, her mother was his dog.

I have also been having a lot of trouble with this website, I have to keep logging in, even for the “session” and the posts seem to be coming up randomly in all the threads I look at, thatbis they are not sequential at all, and in the end I can’t follow anything.

has anyone else had this problem or is it just me?

peri

In response to: Re: Trying to be happy, isn’t working

Re: Trying to be happy, isn’t working

Hi @Peri ,

I'm so sorry to hear of the loss of your family dog and the anxiety that you have been experiencing, I can see it's been a difficult time and it's completely understandable if you needed to take a step back from the forums. I hope you have had support in this time

Thank you also for flagging the issues that you have been experiencing on the website. If you could please email us at team@saneforums.org with some more details of what you're seeing on the website, we can look into this further for you.

In response to: Re: Trying to be happy, isn’t working

Re: Trying to be happy, isn’t working

Hello @Peri 🤗💕 its lovely to see you again. In answer to your question about the website ... I have not experienced any issues, but sorry you have. It sounds very frustrating, and I hope Sane can fix things up for you asap.

Oh dear, I am very sad about the loss of Maggie. Our furbabies are a very important part of the family and its always distressing to lose them. I have my little Holly here with me in palliative care at present, so her days are limited now too. Nothing more the vets can do for her unfortunately. I just have to trust myself to make the big difficult decision at the right time.

How is your son getting along lately? And your dear little granddaughter?

I wish I could wave a magic wand over you and take away your anxiety and keep the depression at bay as well. If only. Sigh!

Emelia 🌸

In response to: Re: Trying to be happy, isn’t working

Re: Trying to be happy, isn’t working

Hello dear @Peri it's so lovely to see you.

I am so sorry to learn of the loss of your beloved Maggie 😔

Sending you love during this difficult time 💞

In response to: Re: Trying to be happy, isn’t working

Re: Trying to be happy, isn’t working

Hello @Peri , and sending you lots of tender hugs my sister xoxo ❤❤❤

In response to: Re: Trying to be happy, isn’t working

Re: Trying to be happy, isn’t working

sending lots of love @Peri
im sorry to hear about maggie

In response to: Re: Trying to be happy, isn’t working

Re: Trying to be happy, isn’t working

Dear @outlander @Shaz51 @Anastasia @Emelia8 @cloudcore , and others who support me,

i have not been around much , but as I have said before, I follow lots of you along the way.

My life has been very up and down and I am really working on techniques to keep my depression under some sort of control.

I have been trying mindfulness. Which is sometimes very effective.

i am also trying to engage more in my own life, but I am not going out or meeting other people at all. Even at Christmas I didn’t see anyone other than my brother.

I am not mad about Christmas at the best of times, there are too many memories for me and such a sense of loss.

i did put up the tree and stuff, for my granddaughter mostly and just to be a bit festive.

I have been reading for ages that you can choose to be happy, I have always doubted this. But last night I read an article about it and it is not as simple as it sounds. I am not what I would call a natural smiler, but people who choose to be happy smile a lot apparently. So today I am smiling, I feel a bit of a twit just walking around smiling at no one in particular. But I shall keep it up. And see what effect it has.

Grateful is another one happy people do, I struggle with this. Not that I don’t have things to be grateful for , but I would like some stuff in the present.

I have been struggling a lot with feelings of loss, family members who have died, especially my parents. I was lucky to have had them , especially my mother so long and I am grateful for that. But now that I am 70 I am sort of the next lot in line. I keep reading about so and so who has died and was 70, 72, 74 and so on. I don’t think I’m 70 but chronologically it is a fact.

I need to start exercising, I really believe in keeping the body active but am not much interested in going for walks at the moment. It is also a really hot summer here in WA

the covid nonsense is also really irritating me. Our premier here is power mad and the funny thing is most people seem happy to go along with him. I can see how easily fear can lead to dictators controlling populations. Oh I won’t go on.

I hope everyone is OK or really well this year,

love to all @peri

@HenryX @Clawde @TAB Re: HAPPY BIRTHDAY !!!!

In response to: Re: Trying to be happy, isn’t working

Re: Trying to be happy, isn’t working

Hi @Peri sounds tough, and yes , exercise helps and sometimes it takes an effort to try and get on top of things I'm in WA, I'm worrying about things and not quite 60 yet lol so you have got that far 😎

speaking of decrepitude am off to have MRI on bung knee that gave out the other day thanks for the tag

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