Trying to be happy, isn’t working

I’m sorry about your father in law @Emelia8

Hope your h is ok. Thinking of you both and sending loving hugs

💕🤗💕

Hi @Former-Member @outlander @Eve7 @Emelia8 @Appleblossom ,

i frequently read or hear it said that happiness is a choice. That you can choose to be happy . I have been trying this, I don’t believe it. I certainly lay don’t choose to be unhappy or depressed and anxious, but how do you choose happy?

happy for me has always been something more than just being busy or occupying time usefully, or being with family or whatever. It is something above that. I do occupy myself, I look after family members still but happiness does not seem to come with the package. I can wake and say, today I am going to be happy and really put myself in the way of trying to get it. But I don’t believe that you can just choose to be happy.

thoughts appreciated.

peri

This is sort of replying to myself!

but to anyone who may follow @Former-Member @outlander @Eve7 @Emelia8 @Appleblossom @Shaz

i have been going through an odd phase. I am not as down as I was, but am extremely anxious and find I struggle to get up in the mornings and do anything. Once I do get up I can be productive and do feel better.

i am still housebound and find it hard to go out or meet friends. I keep in touch with a few people by phone or message that seems to be enough but I know it is not engaging with life. And then those Act, Belong, Commit ads come on and I feel bad about myself. I will commit to taking my little dogs for a walk later today, after mt granddaughter goes back to he mother.

i speak to my older son, who lives with his family in England, and he is planning on coming home in two years. I will love that as I miss him very much and don’t see me going to the uk again.

i feel a bit low today I don’t know why,

i can hear my little granddaughter playing with one of her keyboards. She loves musical instruments that have lights and stuff.

I shall go and play with her. Peri

Hi there @Peri ... I'm really glad you have posted here today. Of course I'm following! I always do, even if I dont reply immediately. I subscribe to quite a few threads, and yours is definitely one of them.

Well, it sounds like some progress is being made for you Peri. Some of the worst of your depression appears to have shifted a little. Thats good. Perhaps you are a little like me ... either depression is bad and anxiety takes a back seat for a while, or anxiety is intense and depression eases. I guess none of us can really suffer huge levels of both at the same time? Bit of a protection mechanism I suppose. Anyway I am glad you are not as down overall as you were before. To me that seems like progress. Although getting up each morning and starting a new day is still an effort, you are now able to push through and be productive. Being productive always gives me a sense of achievement and a sense of worth.

I note that you are still housebound. Have you made any further enquiries about returning to nursing work in some form? I know you had spoken about doing that, but dont know if you have followed up on it yet. Being someone who was obviously devoted to your work, it would tick quite a few boxes for you ... sense of worth, engagement with other people, a reason to get up each day, extra finances to fund something nice for you. I really hope you can make enquiries, because it could be a solution to several of your issues.

Oh wow ... how fantastic! I know how much you miss your son and family in England. I know 2 years seems a long way off still, but it will go quickly. I know COVID has hit the UK very badly, has your son or family been badly impacted at all?

How sweet ... I can just picture your dear little ganddaughter tinkering with a keyboard, as it lights up with lights and sounds. How precious she is. 😊💝 Yes definitely go and play with her.

I note you say you feel a little low today .. though not sure why. I hope that has passed, or will soon pass. Tomorrow is another day ... hopefully a much better one. Sending you lots of love Peri.

Emelia 💞🤗

Hello dear @Peri ... I havent seen you around in a while, so decided I would pop in and say hello. To see how you're going, and also to let you know that I've been thinking of you. 🌸

Hope the weather over in WA has been kinder to you than it was last week when you last posted. We have been getting lots of rain here the past few days, and a lot more coming this week again. Could be complaining soon about flooding and too wet underfoot. Better than overly dry or too hot though. At least in my view.

Anyway ... I do hope you're okay. Do you have plans for Christmas? Do you normally have a traditional Christmas lunch with family members present? I expect your granddaughter will be looking forward to the day ... for lots of reasons.

Emelia 😊💓

Thank you for thinking of me Em. I am not in a good place really low and anxious

I think about yo a lot and how you are going I just can't say much I think my brain has stopped working

peri

@Emelia8

I think of you often dear @Peri 💕

Really sorry to hear you are not in a good place right now, with low mood and anxiety seemingly taking a hold.

I know what you mean when you say that sometimes the brain seems to have forgotten how to work. I get that too.

I hope you can let things drift over you in the short term and then work your way back again once you've taken breath and feeling more in control. Are you someone who often feels very low at this time of year, with Christmas fast approaching? I know it affects many people adversely. Luckily, Christmas does not really do that ... for me, its little different to any other time of year.

Just remember that I am here if you ever feel the need to talk, and so too are other members who care about you.

Love to you.

Emelia 💞

Hope you're doing a bit better now @Peri