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I am worried and unsure

Eden1919Senior Contributor11 Dec 2018, 12:53 am AEDT

I am worried and unsure

I am nervous because I think things are getting bad again but I am too scared to tell anyone because of the abuse I suffered from the staff at the hospital and the community doctors I was forced to see. I know meds don't work for me they make things worse. I know therapy isn't working for me either. I am trying to eat healthy and exercise and that is not helping. Distractions and getting involved in other things isn't working. I can't find anything that is working. I don't have anywhere to turn for help as my family and friends are not an option and the professionals are not safe and will hurt me again. But I am scared I can feel things coming over me again I have been trying to hard to ignore it all but I am not really able to do it anymore.

I have been been hearing things again and seeing things and I am scared that the spirits are getting stronger again I can feel them they follow me and there is this evil evil feeling like they are waiting to destroy me. They want something from me and they are putting so much pressure on me. I know they are real because they don't leave even with the meds they don't leave and they where always there even when I was little only there weren't so many bad ones then now they all come. I am worried that I am going places in my dreams again and I can feel something so intense I really can but it is hard to explain.

What at should I do I feel like I am slipping back into their world and I am really scared? I really can't tell any professionals that is not safe at all but I am not ok and I am not sure what to do...

24 replies

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In response to: I am worried and unsure

utopiaSenior Contributor14 Dec 2018, 1:56 pm AEDT

Re: I am worried and unsure

That would frustrate the (swear word) out of me @Eden1919. Not being heard.

And yes, I've always tried to find a solution, fix things for people. It's part of my nature.

In response to: Re: I am worried and unsure

BlueBaySenior Contributor14 Dec 2018, 3:45 pm AEDT

Re: I am worried and unsure

Hi @Eden1919

just been reading your post snd it must be very frustrating and terrible thst your psych isn’t listening to you. Thsts their job - to listen snd I mean really listen snd ask you questions snd then make an informed decision based on what you tell him.

I can’t remrmber if you wrote that you’ve told your doctor. If you haven’t it would be good if you can tell your doctor.

I cant understand why your psych isn’t listening. What just because he says you look good doesn’t mean you are good.

Or change psychs but that could mean a long waiting time. Depends how busy they are I guess.

What about the CAT team. Can you csll them?

Just trying to hrlp. I feel for you. I would be really sngry too.

BB ❤️

In response to: Re: I am worried and unsure

Eden1919Senior Contributor14 Dec 2018, 5:41 pm AEDT

Re: I am worried and unsure

@Former-Member It is not just the style it is the fact that they don't seem to give a crap what happens like they just really don't understand how intense this is.

@utopia It's ok I understand fix it people can be very helpful in many different situations but it can be difficult when the thing can't be fixed. I think sometimes that makes people who like to fix things feel helpless and frustrated. It isn't them doing anything wrong just a bad situation.

@BlueBay I can't change psychiatrists and my psychologist is leaving and hasn't found a replacement and doesn't even seem to be trying to help find one so I am about to have no psychologist anyway. I can't call CATT because they are horrible and abusive and cruel and just like the hospital staff who hurt me. Honestly the last few times it has gotten to the point where I actually did something and then ended up in hospital and even when I was there they just locked me up in a room and told me to shut up and some other things I can't say on here. Nobody ever listens. I don't have anyone I can go to or anywhere I can go to I have nothing.

In response to: Re: I am worried and unsure

BlueBaySenior Contributor14 Dec 2018, 7:33 pm AEDT

Re: I am worried and unsure

I’m so sorry you were treated like that in hospital @Eden1919. Thst must have been horrible.

Whst about writing down a letter to your psych explaining why everything. I’ve done that before with my psych and he actually listened.

I don’t know what else to suggest.

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