I am worried and unsure

@utopia Thanks I am trying to stay distracted and somewhat calm but it isn't really working I am not sure what else to do. I don't know if I should try telling someone but then I don't know who I could tell... and it isn't like they could do anything anyway. I am really anxious and tired but scared to sleep and I feel really weird idk what to do I feel like I am about to cry or something. I am sorry I am just really confused right now.

@Eden1919. I would tell someone. A go or your psychiatrist. They just might be able to come up with some suggestions to quieten those shadow people and leave you feeling not so frightened.

@utopia My GP doesn't listen to anything I say and he has already said he doesn't know what to do with me on several occasions. My psychiatrist also doesn't listen I have been telling him for months that I am not ok and he just ignores it and says I look fine when he knows damn well I hide everything when I am around people including him. I am so over all this I have been telling all my professionals I am not ok for months and they just ignore it. No body gives a shit well no there is one that kind of tried but there wasn't much she could do and she is leaving anyway so I only see her one more time. I really am done with all this crap and I want to cry I am tired and scared and fed up! I have to make it through today because it is someone in my family's birthday and I just have to make it through today.

@Eden1919 you need to tell someone. Maybe your psychiatrist will listen more now, now that things are getting worse.

Sometimes you need to keep repeating yourself and keep raising your voice, until you are heard.

@utopia I have been trying and repeating myself for months but they don't listen. I don't know what to do I am really scared. I am so stressed and exhausted and I feel really agitated and I want to cry and I feel so bad. I am trying really really hard to stay calm and not freak out but I feel like I am going to explode and I am having a lot of trouble doing daily tasks and I really am lost at this point I am not sure what to do.

Keep repeating yourself @Eden1919. They will hear you sooner or later.

❤

@utopia I know in theory that that is supposed to be how it works but it took them 18 years to accept that there was more than just anxiety going on. And I don't know that I have that kind of time to wait around. I just don't think they really care to find out.

Make them listen @Eden1919

@utopia With all due respect I have tried. This is a conversation I have had a number of times....

me: "I feel very suicidal and I am seeing things I can't eat and everything is too much and I don't think I will be alive much longer I have a plan and I have easy access to the stuff I need to carry it out"

psychiatrist/psychologist: "..... hmmm so how has your sleep been"

me: " fine.... I am really not worried about that so much but I really don't know if I can keep myself alive for much longer"

psychiatrist/psychologist: " so when is out next appointment"

me: " I am not sure. But I might not be alive by then anyway"

psychiatrist/psychologist: " can you do the x'th"

me: " I mean you can make the appointment but I might not be alive by then"

psychiatrist/psychologist: " ok great see you then"

i am not not sure how much more clear I am supposed to be but honestly they don't care so saying make them listen isn't going to work because they don't give a crap. I have tired but obviously they don't care so nothing is going to happen. I understand you are trying to help but I can't just make them listen no one ever listens.

Hey there @Eden1919, it is a frustrating process at times isn't it? We definitely hear you. I am assuming you're on a mental health plan with a specific Psych you've been assigned etc? There are over 100 modalities of therapeutic approach, many different ways suicidal ideation can be managed and explored. I could be wrong but it sounds to me you're feeling frustrated with the style of the people you're working with.

Or am I off?