Hi @Former-Member . Nothing wrong with your username. Says something about you. My username is from an old friend who used to end up in the phych ward at the same time as me. Whenever he was stressed out he would say and try to visualize a calm blue ocean. Sort of stuck with me . I am sort of fortunate in a way because i don't work so can do things that keep me well. Before the virus struck i used to spend an hour in the pool doing laps. My mind would wander off by itself but sometimes i could organize matters that were a bit hard to get around and i could get it sorted with my brain in the pool. It seems to me that if i can relax my brain works better and can process stuff. Was going for long walks with my dog but found it not as relaxing because of traffic noise, big dogs which would scare my little dog and there was too much movement everywhere. Now i go out to the bush with my dog and it is almost as good as the pool. Not having to work has its ups and downs. I always felt i wanted to contribute in some way. Tried to some casual work with a disability provider but was getting so anxious about job interviews etc that i couldn't even eat. I read lots of books about all sorts of things and like watching good movies and what i call boring murder mystery shows. They help wind my brain down for sleep. I have a bit of an unfortunate interest which i have been pursuing since i was about 25. I am interested in zoonotic diseases. That is a disease that can cross from animal to human. Hendra virus for example. I am particularly interested in the origin of where and what animal it came from. I was looking at how the cow pox vaccine could help with cancerous tumours. My friend recently died from lung cancer and i was hoping to get him on a clinical trial. I read scientific journals etc and what i can't understand i look up separately until I know what they are talking about. It keeps my brain active but i have stopped doing it since the virus as I thought it might trigger me. I find lots of things enjoyable and helpful. Drawing or even colouring in. Now this sounds really nerdy but i love vivaldi. The recorder concertos especially. But love four seasons . I guess everyone has their own ways of chilling out. I used to have horses not that long ago. They gave me a job plus hours of happiness. Had to move to town though. Was a huge adjustment but i think i am a bit more settled now. I am rather rambling but is nice to talk to someone. There must be a hobby or something you do to relax. I remember when i was working fulltime i would be so exhausted i didn't really do anything . It was all i could do work, eat, try to care for my son. I was a mess.
