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I am not crazy. It is my narcissistic mother!

Fudge2617Contributor08 Nov 2018, 11:47 pm AEDT

I am not crazy. It is my narcissistic mother!

Please can someone tell me I am not the crazy one.

My Autistic son and I lost everything in the floods of 2013. My mother held my house as our Trustee. After the floods, my son and I wanted to move somewhere safer as it was too traumatic to go back to where we were. I approached her to sign the for sale contract on my house so we could move. She would not sign it UNLESS I gave her $5000.

I did not have $5000 as we had just lost EVERYTHING. In going through solicitors to try and get her to do the right thing by my son (her Autistic Grandson) to sign the contract, she still wouldnt unless I also paid her legal costs. With this and what my son and I had just been through. I had to walk away and she sold the house out from underneath us and left us homeless.

To this day, 5 years on, my son and I are still struggling to get back on our feet. I have managed to save for a small old house. BUT IT IS OURS..

Because she lost money on the sale of MY property, I am now receiving "Seizure and Sale" letters from her solicitor stating she is going to sell our house here because of the debt she incurred because of her OWN actions of Extortion and Greed. I am fighting through the Courts to get back what was ours that she has NO RIGHT to take.

Only for the Legal System to believe the Narcissist and let her continue to threaten us with Homelessness for a second time to her Greed.

What do I do?? I have written to every Government Department to be told, "It is a mother, it is acceptable" even though If I was to do this to her it would be Elder Abuse.

It is a case of Elder Abuse, BUT IT IS THE ELDER DOING THE ABUSING and the system is letting her. My son and I moved 50kms away to get away from her only to have her regularly come to the town we moved to FOR COFFEE!!!!!!!!!!!

What we have been told by people in Authority "MOVE AGAIN"

What do I do other than the unthinkable???

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In response to: I am not crazy. It is my narcissistic mother!

Fudge2617Contributor09 Nov 2018, 4:37 pm AEDT

Re: I am not crazy. It is my narcissistic mother!

Hello Eternalflame.
I will have a look and read about Kris Godinez. Anything to save my sanity.
I have a book that I have read about 10 times and highlighted every page. It is called "You're not crazy, it's your mother'. Healing for daughters with Narcissistic mothers by Danu Morrigan. It is like a bible and I would suggest anyone in a situation anything like mine needs to read it. It is one thing that allows me to see it for what she is A MONSTER. It also shows me that there are bad mothers out there. Not every mother is a good one. Just like any person I suppose. Good and bad. But this so called mother takes the cake. I do not and have not classed her as a mother for 20 years. It is only the last 5 - 6 years that she has really is dead to us.

In response to: Re: I am not crazy. It is my narcissistic mother!

EternalFlameSenior Contributor09 Nov 2018, 8:57 pm AEDT

Re: I am not crazy. It is my narcissistic mother!

@Fudge2617 that's so good that you're taking steps in the right direction towards healing. I know what you mean about having a monster for a mother, I had one my whole childhood life - she was a malignant narcissist also.

I haven't heard of that book, might have a look into it. I do have the book "Will I ever be Good Enough? (Healing the Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers)" not a bad read, but it is a bit on the soft side.

I have kicked everybody on my mum's side out of my life after witnessing my (considerably older) half-sister going down the narcissistic path. What gets me, is that everybody on my mum's side, especially her siblings know what type of person my mother was, yet they did nothing to stop the abuse. And they have the nerve to tell me that "mum was a sick woman, and "she was only doing what she knew best" and all this pitiful stuff - yet they refuse to acknowledge or even try to rebuild some sort of family relation with me. The reality is that they were afraid of my mother because of who she truly was, and I was unfortunately the "odd child" that was born to her.

And same here, I no longer see my biological mother as my mum, but for what she was, a monster, a master manipulator and a child abuser.

In response to: Re: I am not crazy. It is my narcissistic mother!

Fudge2617Contributor09 Nov 2018, 9:53 pm AEDT

Re: I am not crazy. It is my narcissistic mother!

EternalFlame
You make me want to cry in a good way. Someone else understands how bad a mother can be. I have lost most of my friends because of this, but in fairness to them, they dont understand. They cannot fathom that a mother would do this. I have been dealing with this for years and I still dont understand myself so how can someone else.
Doing what they do best lmao Of course they were!!!!! The only thing they know is narcissism and control. I have wiped ANYONE to do with her. I cant even say her name and call her THE MAG GOT. Even that is too good.
How much I have tried to disassociate from her, my house number was 15 hers was 51, I had my house number changed through the council. We are now number 13. What is really getting to me is I have tried through the Legal system to show what she has done and is doing. They just wont believe me. Even with proof. The Legal System has so much to answer for with the way the make their decisions and the way they let someone manipulate and make a joke of the system. I would like to take it to the media in some way on how the system is so broken and how people are using it in spite. Big hugs to you and thank you

In response to: Re: I am not crazy. It is my narcissistic mother!

Fudge2617Contributor09 Nov 2018, 10:00 pm AEDT

Re: I am not crazy. It is my narcissistic mother!

I would also like to take it to the media that a mother would do this. What she has done and continues to do to my son and I. My son is Autistic and is isolated enough with his disability without being forced into isolation because of her. My motto, "You cant fight lies and you cant fight stupidity". I actually have a tattoo on my arm because of her. It gives me the ok to walk away from her forever and not look back.
"Sometimes you need darkness to see the Light"
The only dealings I have with her now are through the courts and system which sometimes are just as Narcissistic as she is.

In response to: Re: I am not crazy. It is my narcissistic mother!

EternalFlameSenior Contributor10 Nov 2018, 4:35 pm AEDT

Re: I am not crazy. It is my narcissistic mother!

@Fudge2617 Same here, it is good to know that I am not alone in my thinking and battles. That also gets to me as well, how people cannot understand or comprehend how a mother would be so cruel and hateful to their own kin. Some people still believe in that rosy "a mother's love is undying" yahoo, but they haven't been witness to the other side of the coin. What if a mother didn't have any love to begin with?

The sole reason that my mother had me, was so she could use me as a tool/weapon to "get back" at her family for abandoning her. She hated her middle sister especially, because she was the favourite, the one that got spoilt, the one that got the best education etc. So it was my job to go out and do better than the rest of her family, to show them that my mother could produce offspring that was worthy and could achieve better than anybody else in the bloodline. Sick isn't it?

Oh don't even get me started on the legal system - they're just as corrupt as the predators and abusers they defend. That's the thing with narcissists, they get off on other people's suffering, because they feel all-powerful and in control. That's why they love playing havoc in the court system, they know they can get away with it and play the victim, when in reality it is them causing the trouble all along. My mother was a master at this. And trying to find a lawyer/solicitor who is aware of narcissistic abuse is just as hard, especially when the majority of them have a narcissistic complex to begin with.

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