I wanna be a bad girl again ....

Well not only has my psychiatrist and mental health nurse said no to me giving up my medications but my psychologist said the same today .... I have completely lost my identity thanks to my mi and now my medications. I am neither one nor the other. Neither mentally ill nor sane. I am in this grey area where I can no longer think of study because my mi has cooked my brain so much that all there is left for me is volunteer work (don't get me wrong I am happy to do it but I have a degree I wanted a phd ....that has gone now).

Now I am so subdued that I cannot sit back and knock back a couple of glasses of wine because my daughter will have a fit due to my meds and mi. Plus my weight issues are starting to kick in with sh. I feel controlled not in control. My mi and medications are in control and I am just hanging on for dear life of what I once was.