Just so exhausted

Hi @show_me_gray

Welcome to the Sane forums and I'm sorry to read that things are so difficult for you. It sounds like you have recently separated from your wife and feel very alone and depressed. You will get much support and understanding here on the forum, and I invite to to take a look around on other threads for discussions that may be helpful.

We are limited as to the level of support we can offer on Sane Forums but I will email you directly with some helpline numbers where you can get immediate and direct support. Please reach out to support services to keep yourself safe.

Regards,

Froginthepond

Thankyou for the kind words, i just wish I didnt have to wait another 2 weeks to see my therapist. The rollercoaster of emotions flipping back and forth is very draining

Hello @show_me_gray I don't have answers but want you to know I heard you and am so sorry. I can feel the despair from your words. You really sound like you need a circuit breaker from the exhaustion. Do you have a good GP? Can that 1% of your family be with you? That's where I started when I was at rock bottom.

I have asked myself some of those questions: why do I have to be this way and why do I never notice what is happening until its too late? My husband, who I loved very much, left me for someone else. It's devastating. If there is one thing I wish for you, it's self compassion. Those big painful questions don't go away, but they can wait.

Is there any way you can shift the questions to create some space for yourself to rest? Is there a way you can step outside a little to see your self as a person who is suffering badly, and focus on what you need in terms of sustaining yourself right now?

I had to focus on sleeping and eating and walking around the block - on literally putting one foot in front of the other. I have found a lot of support here on the forums. I hope it helps you too. There are a lot of people who have struggled, are struggling. They understand and don't judge. Take care.

I hear you and I wish some of those things were possible, I have to try and shut it off but dont know how. My wife left me for another, we are still under the same roof (4weeks now) my son has autism and needs me......my wife continues to rub her new "life" in my face and expects me to be ok. My 1 family memeber is in another state and I feel alone. But im here and desperately trying to force my feet to move one day at a time

hello @show_me_gray and welcome to the forum

letting you know that you are not alone my friend , we are here for you

Hello @frog, @Former-Member

Glad to hear it @show_me_gray When I'm really down the mornings are the worst for me. Are you sleeping ok? That always knocks me for six if I'm not.

How old is your son? I hope caring for him gives you a bit of a focus.

I have two big kids (21 & 15). Both struggle with mood disorders, as do I.

We are crammed into my tiny unit. I sleep under the stairs with the 2 dogs! It took a very long time but I feel like I have a life of my own now, and even look forward to things.

I had some very dark years when I could not see a way out, but I keep on keeping on. I get that sense with you, even though you are so exhausted.

@frog thats the best way to describe it, keep on keeping on, its all i have at this stage. My son is 6, I havent slept well in over a month and have been eating just as poorly....and the kicker is the last 2 weeks i have been doing what I KNOW all too well is the worst possible thing for me.......drinking again!

The cycle will continue to repeat itself until I learn to have the bravery to face these emotions head on and learn from them, rather than being my usual self destructive waste of space.....my son deserves better and he is braver than Iam when it come to this stuff!

But this is my cross to bare and this is the cold, hard, dark rock bottom that I have been slowly spiraling towards for years! But none of that matters now, what matters the most is what I choose to do from this point onwards.....which will be, to be the best damn father to my son I can possibly be.

Peace and love to u all ✌❤

Separation is one of the most difficult times. The world is in desperate need of good enough fathers. @show_me_gray I am sure your boy will benefit from your presence. There are many great people on this forum. We all struggle, but it has helped me to post here.