Feel like no one likes me. The world is against me.

ohh @BradyBird, hello and welcome to the forum

thank you for sharing your story

Letting you know you are not alone and we are here for you my friend

what things do you enjoy doing

I was mentally abused by my dad and then mum and I left but we still lived all in the same same town which my dad kept on rejecting me until 11 years ago when he passed away

we are her for you xx

Welcome to the Forum Family @BradyBird - I am sure you will find peole who care about you here

Your feelings are very real and I think that you are in a really bad grief state right now and one loss at a time is really hard - having so any in such a short space of time is massive

You have come to the right place - there are lots of people grieving here

Since 2005 we have had 6 people in my family die - including my parents and although 5 were elderly people one of them was my cousin who was still in his 40s so yes - I do see some of your picture and know how painful all of this is for you

Other people will add more here - people would understand different parts - I understand the grief part myself - I had sigificant loss - one of my children - over 30 years ago now so I identify with what you have written

And breaking up with your boyfriend causes grief too - and if this wasn't working that was the right thing to do but it still hurts a lot

Keep posting - people will answer

Dec

Hello @BradyBird

Hope you find people to relate with and a few ideas to help you on your life path.

Yeah putting on smileys can be hard. Sometimes its better to wait for life/the cosmos to give you the smile. Try and keep open for them.

Today I was pleased as punch just the way a little kids was enthusiastic about a puddle ... it was so gorgeous ... I only smiled quietly to myself but the mum noticed and so we could laugh and smile more together. Its the genuine little moments that make the difference.

WHat makes a difference to you might be different to me. It doesnt matter. Its just learning to be open to catch the smikles.

FOr a long time I had a wall around me and could not see anything to smile about. I had to process a lot of heavy stuff, a little bit like you.

Thats also a huge load of grief and it sounds like things were pretty delicate even when you were young. You are still young, but I hope you know what I mean.

I put my foot in my mouth a lot, so dont take anything personal.

Hope you make some friends here.

Gently Bently

Thank you for your comment @Shaz51 🙂

I am sorry to hear your story about your dad 😞 It's always hard losing someone, especially when you never get a chance to resolve things before they pass.

Most of all I enjoy spending time with my birds. But I also like doing other things such as drawing, reading, exploring new places, listening to music and singing 😉

Do you still have contact with your mum? xxx

@Owlunar Thank you for your reply and kind understanding words 🙂

The grieving is horrible and heart breaking even more when the rest of the family turn their backs on you and you feel you have no one you trust you can turn to. I really hope this wasn't/isn't the case for you?

Thanks for your reply @BradyBird - I appreciate the kind words

Alas - I was alone with my son's death - it was too hard for other people

So yes - I know what that is like and I am so sorry this has happened to you as well

Dec

🎆🎇🎉🎊

@Appleblossom Thank you also for your kind and understanding words 🙂

My childhood was very difficult yes. I grew up in my grand parents house but my dad was always around causing problems. I saw a lot of drug and alcohol abuse and there were times I even witnessed my dad physically assaulting his parents. Many many times we had to involve the police and have my dad arrested.

I try every day to even just smile at the small things (like the smell of the rain and the shining of the sun, the fact I am just alive) but I really struggle every day to find joy in anything anymore.

I have no motivation to get up out of bed every day. I am constantly in tears lately and I just have no idea which direction I need to take to make things better.

I have also tried pushing myself to get out and make new friends but because I suffer anxiety and now severe depression it is really hard for me and I find the more I try and push myself, the more sick I get..

I just feel so lost 😞

I was talking to some birds today. I embarrass my son when I do it.

I was taught at the zoo where I volunteer.

We have a few birders on the forum

@Adge and @Former-Member and @Bubbles3 are three I can think of. I hope they dont me tagging them to say hello.

Hope you are doing alright @BradyBird

Sometimes we need to accept ourselves.

Pushing has a place, but not all the time.

Peace

Hi @BradyBird, your life has been tough and it's not surprising that you might be down and anxious. Just wondering if you have professional support people to talk to, like a trusted GP, psychologist, psychiatrist or some other kind of counsellor. I find these kinds of support so very helpful to my wellbeing emotionally. If you don't already have this kind of support in place, it might help to start with your GP. If you already have this kind of help in place, that's great and I hope that is giving you some relief. Wishing you well, Maz.