FORUMS

Connect with people who understand what you are going through, seek advice and surround yourself with support. We're free, anonymous, and professionally moderated 24/7.

  • 47,612Members
  • 1,358,869Posts
  • 1,400,000Visitors
Events and updates

Topic Tuesday // Distress Tolerance // Tues 17 July, 7pm AEDT

Topic Tuesday // Distress Tolerance // Tues 17 July, 7pm AEDT

Life throws up a range of stressors that can impact us is unique ways. Discomfort isn’t generally something we like to feel so when those strong emotions come along, it can be hard to know what to do to manage.

Distress tolerance is all about learning how to deal with strong emotions. So join us, to answer the question, “how do you cope when you feel like you can’t?”

Share your experiences of coping with uncomfortable emotions. What works? What doesn’t? And what would you like to do more of to support you on your recovery journey? 🐼

Want to receive an email reminder on the night? Hit the 'Like' button below.

_________________________________

I'm new here - what is Topic Tuesday?

Topic Tuesday runs from 7pm - 9pm AEST monthly. Each month we focus on a different topic, with the session facilitated by a Community Manager or Moderator. Sometimes Topic Tuesday will feature a special guest, who is an expert in the topic.

The first post of the thread (this one) will give you an idea of what the topic is and what will be covered.

How do I get involved?

Topic Tuesday takes place right here! It's text based, so no software is needed. During the session, to keep up with the latest posts hit the 'refresh' button on your browser for the latest posts (it doesn't automatically update). Keep an eye for page numbers at the top & bottom of the page and jump to the highest page number for the most recent post.

Throughout the session, the facilitator will put questions out for you to answer, usually asking for your own experience on the topic. To contribute to the session, just hit the 'reply' button and share your thoughts. No answers are right or wrong and everyone is welcome to get involved.

If you have any questions about how to use the Forums, check out our Guides.

183 replies

41 - 50 of 183
1...456...19

In response to: Topic Tuesday // Distress Tolerance // Tues 17 July, 7pm AEDT

Re: Topic Tuesday // Distress Tolerance // Tues 17 July, 7pm AEDT

I've learned lately that I feel much better if I let myself sit in the emotion I'm having and try and figure out where it's coming from. I had a great success recently when I felt myself having a big reaction to my husbands off-hand comment. I managed to avoid a big argument by sitting with it and facing my feelings of low self esteem. 🙂

In response to: Topic Tuesday // Distress Tolerance // Tues 17 July, 7pm AEDT

Re: Topic Tuesday // Distress Tolerance // Tues 17 July, 7pm AEDT

"Does it surprise you to hear that avoiding or fighting against distress actually tends to make it worse?"

I didn't know that until my Doctor mentioned it when I was in a squirrelly mess last month. Then I went off and did some research and discovered I had made myself a whole lot worse over the course of two months avoiding going to see my mum. As soon as I saw her/visted and made a plan with my psychologist for how to manage visits to mum, this avoidance anxiety was solved, although I need to check in with myself and remind myself about the role I will play and WHEN i will visit (how often) because I tend to start feeling anxious thinking about "the next visit". It is very new and I haven;t yet totally bedded in that role and visit time yet.

In response to: Topic Tuesday // Distress Tolerance // Tues 17 July, 7pm AEDT

Re: Topic Tuesday // Distress Tolerance // Tues 17 July, 7pm AEDT

I also have trouble naming the feeling. And also I think I avoid naming the feeling as well because then I have to think abt the situation.

In response to: Topic Tuesday // Distress Tolerance // Tues 17 July, 7pm AEDT

Re: Topic Tuesday // Distress Tolerance // Tues 17 July, 7pm AEDT

I am learning to STOP - to stop what I am doing, take a breathe, observe what is going on around me and proceed mindfully if I can.

In response to: Topic Tuesday // Distress Tolerance // Tues 17 July, 7pm AEDT

Re: Topic Tuesday // Distress Tolerance // Tues 17 July, 7pm AEDT

Emotions can feel so overpowering and complex in that way @ladygrace Has thre been anything you've found helpful in feeling more in control?

That simple act of tuning into our breath and coming back to the present moment is a great strategy for noticing and choosing how we respond to strong emotions @Sue1

Facing your feelings is what distress toelrance is all about @emiweena What helps you to sit with big emotions?

In response to: Topic Tuesday // Distress Tolerance // Tues 17 July, 7pm AEDT

Re: Topic Tuesday // Distress Tolerance // Tues 17 July, 7pm AEDT

Making excuses not to go somewhere. Doing a task that is not relevant or necessary at all and pretending everything is ok, keeping it to myself.

In response to: Topic Tuesday // Distress Tolerance // Tues 17 July, 7pm AEDT

Re: Topic Tuesday // Distress Tolerance // Tues 17 July, 7pm AEDT

I do this often. You've helped me understand what's been going on with me. Thanks

In response to: Re: Topic Tuesday // Distress Tolerance // Tues 17 July, 7pm AEDT

Re: Topic Tuesday // Distress Tolerance // Tues 17 July, 7pm AEDT

Distress intolerant beliefs to look out for

  • It’s unbearable
  • I can’t stand this
  • I can’t do this
  • I must get rid of this
  • I have to stop this
  • It’s bad
  • It will never end

In response to: Topic Tuesday // Distress Tolerance // Tues 17 July, 7pm AEDT

Re: Topic Tuesday // Distress Tolerance // Tues 17 July, 7pm AEDT

One of my go-to avoidance strategies is to jump into "action mode". Its like a frantic attempt to organise and sort out anything and everything. I think I do it to avoid the feelings involved in whatever is happening and to try to get some order somewhere in the chaos.

It's often really unproductive and totally exhausting, and those feelings tend to pop up in other ways anyway.

In response to: Re: Topic Tuesday // Distress Tolerance // Tues 17 July, 7pm AEDT

Re: Topic Tuesday // Distress Tolerance // Tues 17 July, 7pm AEDT

Common ways we avoid distress

  • Situational avoidance e.g. avoiding discussions, seeing friends or going to appointments
  • Reassurance seeking e.g. excessively looking to others to reassure us
  • Suppression e.g. telling yourself to stop feeling the emotion
  • Numbing or withdrawing e.g. using substances, food, or excessive sleep
  • Harmful release e.g. turning to self-harm rather than allowing the emotion to run it’s course
41 - 50 of 183
1...456...19