FORUMS

Connect with people who understand what you are going through, seek advice and surround yourself with support. We're free, anonymous, and professionally moderated 24/7.

  • 47,612Members
  • 1,358,869Posts
  • 1,400,000Visitors
Our stories

Grief and logic

Grief and logic

A thousand times in our lives we face trauma be it grief, depressive episodes or even general tolerance of life and what it throws at us.

I dont know about you but on each of these occasions during that bad period that seems to come and go so regularly, I dont feel the sun is going to rise the next day. Such is the low level of sadness and mental anguish. I simply dont feel life will get back to how it was when I was functioning ok even a few hours ago.

Isn't it logical though, for a person of reasonable intelligence, to remember that this down period will go away as it has each and every time for the last 60 odd years? My conclusion of it is that depression from grief and trauma is so overwhelming of my brain that it smothers any logic of the process of depression. If this is the case then are we thinking straight on other occasions.? For example- anger or mania? I think so.

As a young man my mania was such that its most apparent symptom realised decades later was impulsivity. I'd buy and sell a car every few weeks and every car was the one I'll "have for the rest of my life"!! So where did logic go then? I was smart, reasonable intelligence, had peer people around me in the Air Force and yes, I was immature. But why wasnt logic present when after a short time of falling in love with a super duper Datsun sss did I want a Celica? My mind like the wind changed and there was no logic as I signed the dotted line, lined the sales people with commission and drove off with my baby in heavy debt.

Back to grief. If we can somehow introduce logic into out lives to remind us that life will go on, it will go back to normal routine and it will not continue on and on...we will handle it better. We will give ourselves the time we need to recover all the time in the back of our minds we will know that its logical to believe we will overcome.

I have a laminated note in my bedside draw. It reads-

"tomorrow the sun will rise, even when today the sun appears it will set forever"

It's my own words. When down and lying in bed I reach for it. I dont choose to just remember the words, I physically read it as it then sinks in.

Logic is smothered in our down times just like calmness is absent in angry periods. We have to find ways of overcoming all that grief for a few moments only, to introduce some logical thinking of reality...that normality will return.

WK

26 replies

21 - 26 of 26

In response to: Grief and logic

Re: Grief and logic

@Former-Member - I just saw @Whiteknight posting some poetry, I thought you may be interested!

In response to: Grief and logic

Re: Grief and logic

Hi @Whiteknight@Appleblossom

I starting writing a book about my childhood. I started a few years ago but put it down. I had written about 100 pages. I must get back to thst now.

@Whiteknight Yes I remember now what you wrote - I grew up in the western suburbs of Melbourne. Loved it then but it has changed so much. I wouldn't go back and live in suburbia Melbourne anymore. Down the bay is perfect for me. But who knows I could move agsin.

I love reading your posts snd your poems.

It's so nice having you on the forum 😊

BB xx

In response to: Grief and logic

Re: Grief and logic

LEGS OF SPOKE is a poem about being in a car club and feeling like they dont and wont take the time to understand me when I need a little support. Yet, when humans see a person in a wheelchair (spokes) they jump to get to know them, spend time with them and accept them easier. I know this after I broke my leg and was in a chair for 3 months.

In response to: Grief and logic

Re: Grief and logic

Oh yes @Appleblossom My western suburbs was tough. But anywhere in any city was really a contrast to the Tassy countryside

In response to: Grief and logic

Re: Grief and logicc

Very good. Everyone has their own way of writing and I love reading how others describe their story.

Thanks @Former-Member

In response to: Re: Grief and logic

Re: Grief and logic

@BlueBay

Thanks. Yes, near the beach is great. I will one day be near secluded beaches in the West of Victoria so looking forward to when we sell up and travel around in our van waiting for the house to be built.

We dont visit the city much. My sister loves it down your way. If she didnt have her adult kids with her she'd live in one of those high rise apartments....I cant stand them but each to their own.

It's nice to talk @BlueBay . Good having you around

21 - 26 of 26