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very upset and disappointed real life sucks can I come back :(

very upset and disappointed real life sucks can I come back :(

Hi everyone I desperately need some advice on dealing with my mother. I cannot believe I have hit 52 and I am still asking for advice on how to deal with her but here I am. She is coming up tomorrow to visit and basically told me that she did not want to hug my daughter or go out for coffee with her because my daughter (suffering depression) does not wash her hair and has some dandruff in it.

She told me basically to deal with it. She said she was embarrassed by my my daughter ... Luckally my daughter has something else on so it shouldnt be an issue but it really hurts that she, my mother, grandmother to my children, can be so shallow, I mean who cares on what my daughter looks like. My mother is no oil painting either but my daughter doesnt judge her.

Plus I had a neighbour tell me I was letting myself go ... whilst looking at my stomach. Wonderful. Real life sucks. I am not impressed by it at all.

155 replies

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In response to: very upset and disappointed real life sucks can I come back :(

Re: very upset and disappointed real life sucks can I come back :(

@Snowie@Zoe7 Maybe I should write down those words ... she would be so pissed off if I said them though ... I hate confrontations .... I know my daughter will be brought up again ... I feel like cancelling and hiding under my covers all day would be easier than dealing with this. I have done it in the past.

I promise myself I will never make my daughter feel like this. I tell her every day how much I love her and respect her. My mother has never said that of my daughter ... she has of my perfect child but not my daughter.

I am just such a sad pea about it all.

In response to: Re: very upset and disappointed real life sucks can I come back :(

Re: very upset and disappointed real life sucks can I come back :(

Of course you are such a sad pea about it all @Bunniekins but sadly we do live in a world where difference is not always socially accepted - this I believe is changing in some spheres but there are always going to be people that don't get it... 'we cannot know what we do not know' - and some people do not want to know - that sounds like your mother GP

In response to: Re: very upset and disappointed real life sucks can I come back :(

Re: very upset and disappointed real life sucks can I come back :(

@Bunniekinsshe may be pissed off, however you are not being disrespectful to her. If she continues to bring your daughter up, then you have a right to say you don't want to talk about that.

I understand confrontations are hard and I try to avoid them. If it is making you really upset then it might be wise to cancel, do what is best for you sweetie.

That is exactly why you are a great mother, that you respect your daughter

Hugs for greenpea

In response to: Re: very upset and disappointed real life sucks can I come back :(

Re: very upset and disappointed real life sucks can I come back :(

@Snowie@Zoe7 I will just say that 'I dont want to talk about it'. I can do that ...

In response to: Re: very upset and disappointed real life sucks can I come back :(

Re: very upset and disappointed real life sucks can I come back :(

As @Snowie said @Bunniekins we will be here for you no matter how the day goes...

Now to the imortant things - what is your favourite colour - I need to dress you for the ocassion lol

In response to: Re: very upset and disappointed real life sucks can I come back :(

Re: very upset and disappointed real life sucks can I come back :(

@Zoe7 Zoe7 my favourite colour is green *big smiles*

In response to: Re: very upset and disappointed real life sucks can I come back :(

Re: very upset and disappointed real life sucks can I come back :(

@Zoe7 Dearest Zoe7 it is pea green

In response to: Re: very upset and disappointed real life sucks can I come back :(

Re: very upset and disappointed real life sucks can I come back :(

Pea green it shall be then @Bunniekins

In response to: Re: very upset and disappointed real life sucks can I come back :(

Re: very upset and disappointed real life sucks can I come back :(

I have gone a little more casual for tomorrow @Bunniekins ...

In response to: Re: very upset and disappointed real life sucks can I come back :(

Re: very upset and disappointed real life sucks can I come back :(

@Zoe7 Thank you.

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