Fragile

@Appleblossom Interesting reading along. Sending some of these your way.💜💜💕💕🐾🐾🐾

Lovely to know you are walking with me @Maggie

Sometimes I am journalling and sometimes its pep me up posts.

Always feel free to share anything happening for you when you feel ...

Thanks @Appleblossom I'm short on words mostly, even shorter ATM. Lovely walking along quietly. 💜💕💜

Ohhhh God I know that feeling @Maggie Well schooled in silence.

Struggled with the mind and mouth lining up and being intelligible.

Writing on the forum helped me, as my mind to my fingers seemed to be more reliable fit!

Lovely having you. Please dont doubt that.

Just posting an emoticon sometimes can help ... both posting ... and for reciever.

Hugs

@Appleblossom Amazing how so few words can say so much. Thankyou. I do doubt it, but hearing with more than my eyes. 💜💜

I was devastated and shattered last night. A concert night,Teresa of AvilaSt Francis AssissiThe Resurrection - TidyingZuiderkirk - AmsterdamWandjinaLohengrinCrucifixion - R Drysdale which everyone was celebrating as a success. A woman believed she had the right to directly challenge and dig and tell me I was doing the wrong thing in my family without bothering to listen.

Some things are beyond words.

That is extremely disappointing for you @Appleblossom and competely unacceptable from this women. Some people just do not know how to interact with others and believe that they are better than those around them - she obviously has issues herself if she needs to make you feel bad to make herself feel better - not one bit acceptable and you deserve so much better than that. I hope she is not someone you need to openly interact with in the future as you do not need that negativity in your life. Sitting with you Hon 💐

@Zoe7 You are right there for me. Thank you so much.

Yes she does issues. Everybody does, but she is not mature, though a couple of years older than me. She is a self appointed bossy boots in the choir and thinks she is cute and funny (was secondary teacher). We will see how it proceeds.

At first I just got my car, had a little bump getting it out of car park, started to drive home, got lost and and deep triggered, by not knowing the roads, city traffic, blinded bunny in the head lights. Reliased I was unsafe to drive and actually close to the after party. So went to after party and told her what I thought. Another lady calmed me down til I was safe to drive, but I was talking about driving into a wall, whilst everybody was celebrating. The lady who calmed me down, was an ex medical worker and also an ex piano student of mine.

I also realised a lady (disabled) who had been rude and manipulative to me at the choir, was the same worker in the home schooling section of the Vic education department, who got the sack and they found a few years of emails from desperate parents trying to get help for the children ... I was on of them ... my son's gf told me. My son did not show up, but his gf had been at my place, cos son not well enough she got her dad to take his ticket. Her dad had been boss of section of ed dept. It was partly why she was so good to my son, cos she was horrified one of the workers had let so many people down.

Mental health issues are always the result of a long succession of unresolved issues, but not always the fault of the person who is suffering. Usually they are trying their hardest ...

I got home safely took a prn, but it was actually good that I went to the after party and calmed down "in company" only remembering to take prn while driving home as I was still extremely triggered though have a lot of self control to bring to bear in concert and social situations.

I posted pics representing the main spiritual things that have kept me going so far. The arts and music, true spirituality and connections to indigenous culture, and the birth places of my mother and father - Holland and Australia.

Just saw the iimages now @Appleblossom Certainly a wide selection that represent who you are or where you have come from.

I think you handled yourself the best you could under extremely diffiult circumstances. It is horrible when the one thing that gives you so much enjoyment collides witht he past or is triggering for you Apple. Usually I would say that confronting this person as you did would not achieve anything but I can see that it was what was needed for you to be abe to move forward even in a little way. Her behaviour and attitude was unacceptable and sometimes these people need to be called out on the harm they do to others. I am so pleased that you had someone nice to help you calm down - enough at least to drive home. No wonder you needed a prn I hope this woman thinks twice about her actions and words in the future but sadly I find that people like that have no filter and definitely no listening ears - they are solely about making themselves feel superior in whatever way they can - and that is often at the expense of others. I hope you can avoid her in the future - at the very least that she backs off from you and doesn't try the same tactics again.

Thanks for your thoughtful reply. @Zoe7 It showed you did "listen" while reading my post.

Until last few years I have always moved away and moved on without confrontation ....

for lots of reasons ...

Both triggering ladies were teachers or in ed dept.

I did not confront the disabled ex clerical worker, but if she is rude and abrupt to me again, I will. Just because her disability is visible (she has a limp) does not mean that she should not give consideration to other disabled people and just plain ... other people ... by the time we get old ... everyone has some weakness/disability or other ....

The bossy lady who deliberately dug and confronted me ... not sure how that will go .. she is also loud about suicide issues ... which I have delicately side stepped ... she really needs a dummy put in her mouth ... I promised the lady who calmed me down that I would not leave the choir ... yet.

Logging off.