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Fragile

Fragile

For a while I have tried to find a thread I had started when I joined the forum that could be a "home" thread for me.

Being busy about the forum has been a coping style, where I can acknowledge all my different life experiences that had been silenced. Possibly do some good and prevent things from getting worse. Like the little boy with the finger in the dyke.

Feeling fragile

Needing Nurture

Generations: Son to SonMoments of BeautyGrapes are Greatand look out the window ...Namitjara

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In response to: Fragile

Re: Fragile

Well I had a chuckle @Appleblossom I like your your sense of humour. How are you going anyway.

Didn't watch the second vid yet. Had a Few visitors. Some doc came to look at the huge lump they took of my back, but they won't show it to me for some reason. I recon it has a big red eye, small mouth with 3 long, yellow, sharp, crooked teeth. A chip of the old block you might say.

Tell me something. Do you think one day I will take life seriously.. or am I just condemned to remain an idiot. Maybe I better watch that vid tonight. Thanks for always writing to me Appleblossom.

Letters really are like little Christmas presents. I have one of those new Oled screens on my laptop, So those pics you send are beyond words.

Well, hope you and your son have the amp warmed up, taking turns on tunes. I'll keep reading n pop back later.. tonys mb 1

In response to: Re: Fragile

Re: Fragile

wow Oled @tonys had to look it up ... fancy tek mate ... not my scene ... I am always decades behind in the stuff competition ... but hey yesterday ... I knocked back a baby grand ... ha ha ...

trying to find a good owner and position for it.

I do not buy into the "idiot" word much ... though yesterday I did use it when my young gung ho physio was going on about Michael Jackson ... mostly ... I heard the word a lot as a child ... not in my own family ... it was not the way we thought or spoke ... but by the ruff and tumble types I encountered here and there ... they were always whinging about an idiot ... somewhere ...

also another older more mature physio about 30 years ago told me I was being treated as the village idiot ... to get my spine, back and neck into such a state. He phoned me at home ... to check in ... which I really appreciated as a sign of respect and care.

You are just you.

In response to: Re: Fragile

Re: Fragile

@tonys Ignorance can be BLISS ... not always but when it is ... ENJOY!

In response to: Re: Fragile

Re: Fragile

Yes I'm a contradiction, Home and wardrobe an eclectic ensemble of rubbish, op shop tip rejects,

and here I sit ogling my big bucks Oled Microchip master piece. Wanna know a secret. My OT some how managed to wrangle one for me on my plan. I agree, I don't think I deserve it either but I aint handing it back...

A baby grand, are we talking about a piano. Mate , don't move . I organizing a truck.

I do get you on the "idiot word" thats me in my town, but it wipes off. They forget that I pay wages when picking season comes around. When they lay it on me, I don't really think there is malice or venom in it. Got a pile of get well cards and gifts from the very same people. Will life's lessons ever stop coming @Appleblossom . Abuse has a different feel about it. I walk away and stay away from those folks, My current thinking is, I have laboured, suffered, endured long and hard for many years and earned the right to call myself an idiot. It sits comfortably with me. Tomorrow I'll change my mind.

Who knows why... Know what , I'll bet you why.. Have a heap of questions I'm dying to ask you about those vids etc and how things work , but time has got away. Have to finish mail in a bit. Talk soon mate.

t

In response to: Fragile

Re: Fragile

Oh a tantie was called for lol.
And yes laughing is imperative to me staying WELL! I say all the time, if I don’t laugh till cry 😭😂😂😂❤️

In response to: Re: Fragile

Re: Fragile

Hoping you are OK @Appleblossom

In response to: Re: Fragile

Re: Fragile

Thank you @Dimity I had a bit of trauma trigger mid week and missed 2 appointments this week ... so dancing on the edge. It happens occasionally that I miss. One was church, but I was looking forward nd prepared to go, but then lost in lala land. Thought I got up early enough.

The week before I had a trauma trigger while playing with a group ... finding ways to talk about it without getting too intense will be good... see what happens ... but not all bleak ... had some good interactions and good music making.

How is it going with your sister and everything?

In response to: Re: Fragile

Re: Fragile

Hugs @Appleblossom ... it's good to be mindful of your steps when dancing close to the edge. Glad some of the musicking was good. Triggered trauma is hard.

Thanks, I've been stressed, my sister is a bit erratic and declining my help but my nephew is making progress. Her treatment seems on track. Too much has been happening in the neighbourhood and I wondered if I was close to the edge myself last week. I retreated under the covers and hibernated some of the weekend which is unlike me.

Let's trust this week will be better. Take care.

In response to: Re: Fragile

Re: Fragile

Glad your nephew is helping. @Dimity

Caring can be like an eggshell dance with siblings.

Trauma in families is so difficult and things get very delicate. Somehow when I first began hibernating under doona ...not til late 40s ... despite all the negative stuff about doin it ... I felt it did not apply to me ... historically for me the bed was not a safe place.... I do not do it a great deal either ... I try snd be active ... but sometimes the body knows best. I still have not made it to the yoga and exercise classes as I need to be robust when doing them ... people a bit judgy, but I guess we all get a bit like that ...when I am supersensitive I just back right off ... tho the classes were good for me ... maybe in a couple of weeks ...

In response to: Re: Fragile

Re: Fragile

"Speak only to improve the silence." @StanD

"Feelings are only visitors." @tyme

Some things are worth repeating.

Thanks

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