catching up

Karen i am agressive but not violent, my moods are all over the placew, but i manage it, like all my MH problems it is all about management and avoiding triggers.

Karen i love you just the way you are, please never change, you are my best friend and all the diagnosis or labels will never change the fact you are my best friend, you are my world and you mean more to me than all the money in the world, you are that special to me 😄

Karen we are all insecure, i would have to be the most insecure person in the world, i constantly need my mothers reassurance to do anything, i always have, i am scared of leaving my parents and have never done so, my angel, don't allow you fears and insecurities control your future, it is looking so bright, i wish you could see what i see.

hugs my angel, be back soon, oh i have to go to town at 7am, so i should be home by lunch time, fingers crossed i can handle it.

hi my angel,

i know you would give me the same support, maybe even more so, so their is no need to thank me.

I hope you and the girls had a nice afternoon and it is not too warm where you are. even though i thought i saw on the weather map it was going to be hot in Melbourne 😞

anyway hugs my angel, i thought about you this afternoon while i was trying to go to sleep, thank you for holding my hand, while i drifted to the land of nod 🙂

JAcques

OMG Karen, i am so glad you had a nap too, you so needed it and no night terrors, what a bonus 🙂

Dinner is pork chops and 3 veg, how about you?

I am starting to get nervious about tomorrow. i can already feel the anxiety building 😞

Hi my angel,

your tea sounds really nice, i hope you and the girls enjoyed.

Thank you my angel, the anxiety is building, i am fighting the urge to pace the room, i don't want mum to know how anxious i am.

This man and his wife have been so good to mum and i, when we had no food they bought us food, when we had to go to appointments they took us, we owe them a lot, i feel so indebted to them.

Karen i don't know about being strong, just feel guilty, my angel, thank you for being here for me, you are wonderful.

I just want to tell you that just because you have been diagnosed with a certain illness does not mean you have all of the charictaristic of tha illness. i know i only have 6 of the 9 indicatiors for BPD, so you see you are not like your husband, he was agressive and violent, you are passive, that just means you do not meet that indicator, that is all, i know you are a kind, caring and loving person Karen, you always will be, i am so glad you chose to be my friend, i could ask for no one better than you my angel 🙂

My angel, the words i speak are just the truth, no more, no less, to me you are a perfect princess 🙂

Oh that is terrible Karen, they really should be honest with you, honesty is the only way you create a bond, i think we try to be honest with each other, i would not want to be lied to either.

I hope you can find information i will try my best to help you find more information so you can learn and understand it may have stigma but it really is just a series of minor problems grouped into a name.

My angel, i found out about BPD through a topic tuesday they where having here, as well as reasearching on google and youtube. their are many good videos on youtube about BPD from experts, they explain it so well.

Parts of the BPD i am ashamed of, not so much the diagnosis but the things i do to myself every day, not just the SH but other things, horrible things, i am too ashamed to say it here, and i don't want to tell you because it will be triggering for you to hear. 😞

Yes, it is i think, my hands are starting to shake and i am getting restless. the early signs of my anxiety, i am trying to distract, and it is nice talking to you, it helps keep my mind off tomorrow, and all the things that can go wrong 😞

hugs my angel, you are an awsome friend. you have not walked away form me when i told you part of my condition is manipulation, SH, anxiety, depression, SI. you have been here unconditionally ,and so i will do the same, nothing you tell me will change the fact that you are my best friend. 🙂