My special place

@Snowie

It’s not wrong at all. In fact, I think it’s healthy to acknowledge that it’s hard and that you aren’t enjoying it. It’s a really hard position to be in.

If you want to share about why it feels hard to invite H to your session and why it might be helpful I’d love to understand more about what that’s like for you.

I ended up calling beyond blue (because my brain temporarily convinced me I’d die if I fell asleep) and ended up talking to someone really kind which helped.

Hi @Wintersweet

Having H come to my appt. means a lot more would be out in the open. He would know what I've been doing most day just to get by. Whilst he already knows a lot, it just means more would come out. It's got nothing to do with him, he is always supportive. It has more to do with me and letting my guard down.

I'm glad you called beyond blue and you were able to talk to someone that helped you. Just making that call can be scary at times.

I hope today is going well for you 💕

@Snowie

I’m sure the part of you that learned not to let your guard down has done a lot to try and protect you through your life. I hope that you’re able to reassure yourself about what makes this situation objectively different (H’s support and having your psych to help) even though I’m sure it would still feel scary. Would it help to talk with your psych about the fear? I can hear how hard things are for you and am sending you all the hugs and 💛 with continued gratitude for your kind words and encouragement.

@Snowie

💛 for you

If you need to reach out to a crisis line for support, please do, and may they be kind and understanding like the lady I spoke to on Tuesday.

Hi dear @Wintersweet

I ended up reaching out yesterday and spoke to someone that helped. Not really in suggesting anything, but just listening to what I needed to get out.

I made it down the street this morning. I was going to try and make it into the garden this afternoon but will see how I go.

I hope your day is going ok. Do you have much planned for the weekend?