My special place

I am sorry You’re unwell @Snowie and I hope a nap helps.

It’s good to keep seeing our supports to keep us accountable even when we can’t do what they suggest. Sometimes our next appointment is all that keeps us going.

Hey @Snowie

Those feelings are really rough. Feeling unwell adds to that too.

Totally understand about how you're feeling re the psychologist but I do hope you get something positive out of your appt.

If she's angry with you she ain't much of a health professional IMO.

Sending hugs

Hanami

Thanks @hanami

I know she won't probably be angry with me but I guess that is just what I think.

I just don't understand why things are like what they are at the moment.

I think I can understand how you're feeling when you say you can't understand why things are the way they are right now. I always need reasons too. If I'm feeling a certain way and nothing in particular has happened I will ask my husband, why do I feel this way. He is the sort of person that just accepts things and I envy that. I need answers! I hope tomorrow is better for you.

Hugs

Hanami

I hope tomorrow is better too @hanami but struggling to see that far in front. Just trying to get through each day.

I hate when I have no answers for things, which is what has been happening lately.

@Snowie Thinking of you and hoping your psych appt goes well today... 💙

Saw my psych this morning. Was a tough session. She asked again if I needed to go to hospital and again I said no. Don't want to sit in a waiting room for hours just for them to judge me and send me home.

I am really hesitant that in two weeks it will be my last session with her before the holidays. I know they are entitled to time off and they she probably needs time away from her job, but I am scared how I will cope. It will mean a good 5 weeks between appointments. At the moment I find two weeks between appointments hard. I think I have come to rely on her too much. I know I have other supports, but over xmas everything seems to stop, yet my Mental Illness doesn't know that. I wish I could just take a few weeks off from it, but unfortunately it doesn't work that way.

I find xmas so hard to deal with and find it really hard to cope. When families are meant to get together my family won't be because of me. Because I decided to put that wall between me and my sibling, xmas family time doesn't happen anymore. And it is my fault. My fault that the family isn't together, my fault that it affects others, my fault that their is a fault line.

I just want to hide, I want to dull the pain inside my head, I want to say no more.

Hey @Snowie , I’m sorry today has been so tough and I understand your fears regarding the break in between visits to our supports. I’m annoyed at myself too for relying on my pdoc so much as I know she can’t possibly keep seeing me every week.

I know you have a holiday to look forward to soon…maybe we can join up for a virtual jet ski together.

Lots of love hon 💜💜💜

Thanks @Eve7

It is hard to rely on our supports, and even harder when don't see them for awhile.

If you need to see your pdoc every week then so be it hon. They are there to support you through the good and bad times.

Yes we do have a holiday to look forward too. A jet ski together would be fun. We take our jet ski away when we go to the Murray River, the kids have a lot of fun on it! I am hoping that can keep me going the next few weeks. It is still hard to look that far ahead. Still seem to be taking it day by day but that is better then minute by minute, so will take that as a win.

That is a win @Snowie 💙 Sorry Hon - got side tracked with the fur babies and some more things blown around with the wind outside.

@Eve7 💖