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Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

DeterminedSenior Contributor22 Jan 2018, 1:25 pm AEDT

Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

This thread is a follow on (or starting over) from my previous thread Caring for a wife with borderline personality disorder – sequel to diary of wife's hospital stay, I wanted to start over and in order to leave all the trauma and negativity of last year behind me and start fresh.

Those of you who have been following our family journey will know that after a number of hospital admissions for my darling I was encouraged by my councillor to implement some boundaries (lovingly implemented guidelines, not rules to be enforced) as well as self-care for myself as what we were doing was clearly not working and my health was /still is being affected.

Well after a smoother than expected start the boundaries and self-care were forgotten with my darling having a complete melt down and further lengthy hospital admissions due to high risk of self harm and a genuine attempt to leave us. The last 6 months particularly have been quite difficult for us all. S2 particularly had a lot of issues at school during this time and is currently seeing a councillor.

The purpose of this new thread is to again document our journey of healing, working on implemented boundaries and commitment to self care. As with the previous thread this is so that I can have a visual plan for myself with some accountability to follow through with plans in place and in the hope that it may help others in similar situations to ours. And so that I can track our progress. This was especially helpful in the last thread leading up to Christmas when I was feeling down about our current position to review what I had written and see just how far we have come.

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In response to: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

DeterminedSenior Contributor08 Dec 2018, 8:03 pm AEDT

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

When she left in the ambulance this morning I was convinced she would not be coming home @Shaz51.

She did have considerably more color this afternoon though so hoping I am wrong.

Drs may be right in the diagnosis of the symptoms but the underlying cause is not going away so I feel they are giving false hope 😐

In response to: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Unknown userMember08 Dec 2018, 8:14 pm AEDT

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

@Determined

Walking each other home is so very difficult at times ...

Keeping a special place in prayers for you all.

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Sophie1Senior Contributor08 Dec 2018, 9:47 pm AEDT

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

@Determined Sounds like a super stressful time - take care of yourself and find a few moments to nurture yourself whatever that means for you x

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

SmcSenior Contributor09 Dec 2018, 2:51 pm AEDT

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

@Determined,

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

DeterminedSenior Contributor10 Dec 2018, 8:16 pm AEDT

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Went to visit MIL late this ave.

She is looking better and was out of bed which is a relief. Aparently she is being moved from acute care to general ward tonight or tomorrow.

S3 was pleased to see her. He has been constantly asking after her yesterday and today. This afternoon he was at her table working on activities that they do together because he was missing her... sweet but 😥

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

DeterminedSenior Contributor13 Dec 2018, 10:01 pm AEDT

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Darling went to visit mum in law this afternoon.

Mum hopeful she can come home tomorrow. Dr told darling this afternoon that it is only being considered as we are so close and so willing to help out.

She is doing so much better but still tires so quickly.

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Unknown userMember13 Dec 2018, 10:09 pm AEDT

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

@Determined

Thinking especially of you.

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

DeterminedSenior Contributor13 Dec 2018, 10:32 pm AEDT

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Thanks @Former-Member, much appreciated. More adulting duties coming up 😩

I have to say though in this instance (assisting mum and dad in law) it is greatly appreciated and appreciation for assistance is always expressed.

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Unknown userMember14 Dec 2018, 5:48 pm AEDT

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

DeterminedSenior Contributor14 Dec 2018, 5:56 pm AEDT

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Love it @Former-Member

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SANE acknowledges the Traditional Owners of Country throughout Australia and recognises the continuing connection to lands, waters and communities. We pay our respect to Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander cultures; and to Elders past and present.

SANE values diversity. We are committed to providing a safe, culturally appropriate, and inclusive service for all people, regardless of their ethnicity, faith, disability, sexuality, or gender identity.