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Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

This thread is a follow on (or starting over) from my previous thread Caring for a wife with borderline personality disorder – sequel to diary of wife's hospital stay, I wanted to start over and in order to leave all the trauma and negativity of last year behind me and start fresh.

Those of you who have been following our family journey will know that after a number of hospital admissions for my darling I was encouraged by my councillor to implement some boundaries (lovingly implemented guidelines, not rules to be enforced) as well as self-care for myself as what we were doing was clearly not working and my health was /still is being affected.

Well after a smoother than expected start the boundaries and self-care were forgotten with my darling having a complete melt down and further lengthy hospital admissions due to high risk of self harm and a genuine attempt to leave us. The last 6 months particularly have been quite difficult for us all. S2 particularly had a lot of issues at school during this time and is currently seeing a councillor.

The purpose of this new thread is to again document our journey of healing, working on implemented boundaries and commitment to self care. As with the previous thread this is so that I can have a visual plan for myself with some accountability to follow through with plans in place and in the hope that it may help others in similar situations to ours. And so that I can track our progress. This was especially helpful in the last thread leading up to Christmas when I was feeling down about our current position to review what I had written and see just how far we have come.

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In response to: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

@soul @Former-Member @Smc @Shaz51

House settlement finally went through this afternoon. That is a huge load off.

Darling was even smiling and laughing this afternoon with one of the children after the call came in. Have not seen her this relaxed in some time.

Even I felt a big weight off. It was clearly weighing me down more than I realised.

Really hoping now that things will go more smoothly for my Darling.

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Phew @Determined

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

YAAAAA @Determined

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Yay, congratulations @Determined. 🙂

In response to: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

@Determined 🙌

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Wow @Determined, so much going on in your life at the moment. Congratulations on the house settlement and your motorbike!! Wishing you smooth sailing, or riding as the case maybe. Enjoy!!

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Why am I not surprised your Darling was texting often during bike course @Determined 😬.

Feeling for you Bro.

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

@Former-Member

I was pleased that I was able to go the day without responding or answering every time she tried calling / or sent text.

Had a quick scan of messages at morning tea and sent reply saying sorry cant help I'm busy. (Sat). Sunday I only got 2 text both of which I ignored until we were finished.

Wasn't easy but a big improvement I was able to do that.

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Managed a 1/2 hour ride this ave on the bike.

😁😀 wow that is fun 😁😀😀😁😁😁

And that is just at 60km/h.

Would have liked to get out on a higher speed road but my supervisor (mum) was not ready for that yet lol. Maybe late on a Sunday afternoon when there is less traffic.

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

On the self care front I have made a councilling appointment for next week for myself.

While I am doing ok (relatively) at the moment I fear that as things progress with mum in law that I will 'fall in a heap' and not be able to support darling and boys and dad inlaw.

This is actually weighing on me a bit atm so trying to get some supports in place for me in advance.

I am hoping that this will be all unnecessary but reality is that the future is not overly bright at the moment.

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