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Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

This thread is a follow on (or starting over) from my previous thread Caring for a wife with borderline personality disorder – sequel to diary of wife's hospital stay, I wanted to start over and in order to leave all the trauma and negativity of last year behind me and start fresh.

Those of you who have been following our family journey will know that after a number of hospital admissions for my darling I was encouraged by my councillor to implement some boundaries (lovingly implemented guidelines, not rules to be enforced) as well as self-care for myself as what we were doing was clearly not working and my health was /still is being affected.

Well after a smoother than expected start the boundaries and self-care were forgotten with my darling having a complete melt down and further lengthy hospital admissions due to high risk of self harm and a genuine attempt to leave us. The last 6 months particularly have been quite difficult for us all. S2 particularly had a lot of issues at school during this time and is currently seeing a councillor.

The purpose of this new thread is to again document our journey of healing, working on implemented boundaries and commitment to self care. As with the previous thread this is so that I can have a visual plan for myself with some accountability to follow through with plans in place and in the hope that it may help others in similar situations to ours. And so that I can track our progress. This was especially helpful in the last thread leading up to Christmas when I was feeling down about our current position to review what I had written and see just how far we have come.

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In response to: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Hi @Smc thanks for checking in.

I have been passively lurking in the fringes when I get a chance but pretty focussed on uni assessment at the moment.

I actually didn't realise it had been so long since I was on.

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

@DeterminedGood to hear back from you. Hope the assessments go well.

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Thanks @Smc

One almost done today. Another to do over the next week. Struggling with focus atm. 5 weeks and this semester is done.

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Going to be a long 5 weeks.

In response to: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

@LearningWaters this is the thread I mentioned about boundaries.

If you go back to page 1 there is an explanation and links back to previous threads.

Happy to answer any questions you have the best I can. Thread gets a bit off track to its inital intent but still I think shows the necessity of self care and boundaries.

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Feeling almost human this morning for the first time in over a week. Have been quite sick. Hoping we have finally turned the corner and on the improve as I have a mountain of work to catch up on 😩

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Well that didn't last long.

Went to work today after 3 weeks off and totally wiped out at the end of it.

Study and assessment not going well either. Still better than I was but not quite yet functional 🥴

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.


Sounds like you need to continue some self administered TLC @Determined. Bugs that hang around like that are frustrating.

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Looks like it @Smc

I have juat been messaged and politely asked not to go to work tomorrow. I didn't think I was quite that bad but people were worried about how sick I looked.

Site supervisor where I work will tell my boss who works at a different site tomorrow. At least that way it is not me who is piking ad I don't like to be unreliable. Which I feel I have been this semester 😕

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Just a quick check in as I have been absent lately

Still running on empty here 😞
Worst of the flu symptoms are gone thankfully but the fatigue fallout continues,

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