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Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

This thread is a follow on (or starting over) from my previous thread Caring for a wife with borderline personality disorder – sequel to diary of wife's hospital stay, I wanted to start over and in order to leave all the trauma and negativity of last year behind me and start fresh.

Those of you who have been following our family journey will know that after a number of hospital admissions for my darling I was encouraged by my councillor to implement some boundaries (lovingly implemented guidelines, not rules to be enforced) as well as self-care for myself as what we were doing was clearly not working and my health was /still is being affected.

Well after a smoother than expected start the boundaries and self-care were forgotten with my darling having a complete melt down and further lengthy hospital admissions due to high risk of self harm and a genuine attempt to leave us. The last 6 months particularly have been quite difficult for us all. S2 particularly had a lot of issues at school during this time and is currently seeing a councillor.

The purpose of this new thread is to again document our journey of healing, working on implemented boundaries and commitment to self care. As with the previous thread this is so that I can have a visual plan for myself with some accountability to follow through with plans in place and in the hope that it may help others in similar situations to ours. And so that I can track our progress. This was especially helpful in the last thread leading up to Christmas when I was feeling down about our current position to review what I had written and see just how far we have come.

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In response to: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

On a positive note the key was found and the car started.

I was unsure if the car had an immobiliser or juat remote unlock.

Thankfully remote unlock only as the remote is toast. Apparently electronic devices don't like salt water lol.

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Well done getting the keys back @Determined.

One old "home remedy" that really works for cuts, burns, and other "prone to infection" injuries is a bit of honey on a bandaid or other dressing. Any Aussie bush honey is good, preferably cold pressed. "Medi-Honey" is overpriced manuka/ti-tree honey. Don't bother with that. 😛 The honey gets absorbed into the skin, and acts as a gentle poultice to draw out any contaminants in the wound. Plus it's antiseptic, antiviral and antifungal, and if you get too much on your fingers while applying it, you can just lick them clean.

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Will have to try the honey @Smc

Growing up my Mum always used a bread poultice.

Lots of infected foot wounds on feet growing up on a farm lol.

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

How are your feet going @Determined ?

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Feet still Red @Former-Member but mostly healed and thankfully no infections.

A bit sore after an hour walk earlier in the week other than that I am surprised how.quickly they healed.

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

I had a meeting with a student advisor today to plan upcoming semester.

Was feeling ok about options after but can feel anxiety rising again already.

Still waiting on a response from enrolments team to approve our proposal 😬

Also I have to make up my mind between face to face v online only learning.

Face to face will.require up to 5 hours per week travel 😬😬

I am determined to finish my degree this year one way or another.

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Have I mentioned that the car key started working again.

Which is great as a replacement is over $150 for non genuine.

Happy about that for as long as it lasts 😁

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Is finishing course attainable without overt stress @Determined ?

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Jury is out on that one @Former-Member

I am waiting on approval on a drop / swap of an elective that will have a big impact.

If it is not sustainable a fall back option is to exit with a lesser degree.

I won't know until it is all underway. I would like to think I can finish but do have concerns about how sustainable it is. Going to be 🙁

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Well I have my finalisation study plan approved.

I will be heading out of town 1 day a week for classes but was able.to secure class times that will allow me to participate in school drop off and pick up. Necessary as that involves 3 different schools at different ends of town 😬

This has reduced a lot of stress for darling and subsequently me

O do have some reservations about the required travel but will juat havw to see how we go with that.

My revised study is somewhat less intensive with the alteration of an elective course. A little dissapointing but this is going to be much more manageable.

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