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Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

This thread is a follow on (or starting over) from my previous thread Caring for a wife with borderline personality disorder – sequel to diary of wife's hospital stay, I wanted to start over and in order to leave all the trauma and negativity of last year behind me and start fresh.

Those of you who have been following our family journey will know that after a number of hospital admissions for my darling I was encouraged by my councillor to implement some boundaries (lovingly implemented guidelines, not rules to be enforced) as well as self-care for myself as what we were doing was clearly not working and my health was /still is being affected.

Well after a smoother than expected start the boundaries and self-care were forgotten with my darling having a complete melt down and further lengthy hospital admissions due to high risk of self harm and a genuine attempt to leave us. The last 6 months particularly have been quite difficult for us all. S2 particularly had a lot of issues at school during this time and is currently seeing a councillor.

The purpose of this new thread is to again document our journey of healing, working on implemented boundaries and commitment to self care. As with the previous thread this is so that I can have a visual plan for myself with some accountability to follow through with plans in place and in the hope that it may help others in similar situations to ours. And so that I can track our progress. This was especially helpful in the last thread leading up to Christmas when I was feeling down about our current position to review what I had written and see just how far we have come.

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In response to: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

@Former-Member, I have been known to take my violin on a motorbike- but in my case, it was carefully held in front of me, between Hubby and I.
Is whatcha do when you don't have a car. 🙂

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Much inspired by this legend 😀

Tommy Emmanuel - One man band.

Tricky stuff starts at 1:45

In response to: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Hi @Shaz51

thanks for checking in. I havent been on here for a while. Here i thought my life was going uphill already but ive just been knocked down again. After my partner’s dose has just been lowered. He started to have this look in his eyes the other day again. Ugh. When do we know its time to walk away? Im scared ill be stuck in a relationship where i just keep giving and not getting any reprieve anymore 😭 sorry for my essay. Youre the first person to ask haha i hope youre in better waters my friend. You’re constant check ups mean a lot to me thank you.

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Yikes @Determined what happened?

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

@Former-Member I kind of over reacted to something stupid one of the boys had done and broke something resulting in a complete melt down by darling.

All of the abuse and things that get deliberately damaged and that's OK. And somehow my fault anyway....

I accidentally break something (despite an over reaction on my part it was a genuine accident) and I am some kind of monster.

Things are back to normal (well our normal) but I am just tired and feeling alone.

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

S1 has started worrying talk about life being too hard and not wanting to be here.

Worrying about what he will be doing post school. (3 years away). And now is refusing to engage in all ndis activities involving a support worker. The things that are in place to prepare him for after school.

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

@Determined 😥💔🙏

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.


@Determined

Our Younger Daughter is flatly refusing any "Young Carer" support or activities we've mentioned to her. She's also heading towards final years of schooling. Am wondering if the reasons are similar to your son- trying to find out where they fit in the big wide world, not altogether confident that they do fit, and therefore avoiding things which single them out as "different" from the other kids.

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