FORUMS

Connect with people who understand what you are going through, seek advice and surround yourself with support. We're free, anonymous, and professionally moderated 24/7.

  • 47,612Members
  • 1,358,869Posts
  • 1,400,000Visitors
Friends, families and carers

Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

This thread is a follow on (or starting over) from my previous thread Caring for a wife with borderline personality disorder – sequel to diary of wife's hospital stay, I wanted to start over and in order to leave all the trauma and negativity of last year behind me and start fresh.

Those of you who have been following our family journey will know that after a number of hospital admissions for my darling I was encouraged by my councillor to implement some boundaries (lovingly implemented guidelines, not rules to be enforced) as well as self-care for myself as what we were doing was clearly not working and my health was /still is being affected.

Well after a smoother than expected start the boundaries and self-care were forgotten with my darling having a complete melt down and further lengthy hospital admissions due to high risk of self harm and a genuine attempt to leave us. The last 6 months particularly have been quite difficult for us all. S2 particularly had a lot of issues at school during this time and is currently seeing a councillor.

The purpose of this new thread is to again document our journey of healing, working on implemented boundaries and commitment to self care. As with the previous thread this is so that I can have a visual plan for myself with some accountability to follow through with plans in place and in the hope that it may help others in similar situations to ours. And so that I can track our progress. This was especially helpful in the last thread leading up to Christmas when I was feeling down about our current position to review what I had written and see just how far we have come.

2306 replies

111 - 120 of 2,306

In response to: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

To me it means being aware and being able to encourage my loved one to do what is necessary to be as well as he can be. I agree @Determined, @Former-Member and encouraging to a point to show that you love them but not going over the line of pestering which can be hard at times

In response to: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

@Determined

I have read your recent posts and think that everything that you have vented is a very valid response to the events that you have been part of..the natural need also to protect your children

the natural reaction for your own peace of mind..

darcy has expressed very well her perspective and experience..

if yor wife's psydoc? Is this psychologist or psychiatrist? How often are visits? How comfortable is your wife with said person?

Said professional is expressing don't know what to do?

not good enough...refer wife to someone else or will wife be willing to seek another as not helping..

good of psychiatrists do not give up..

appreciate also that you are drained and over it...professionals should be handling next step

sadly they are not all good at their job..

main question does your wife still believe that they have her best interests at heart...

so hard for both of you

my husband and I are struggling too at moment...not an easy path for the faint hearted

wishing you all the best..I know that you give it your all...I sit on both sides of the wall

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Thanks @Former-Member

Sorry to hear you are struggling at the moment also. Trust things smooth out for you soon.

In response to: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Quick wave @Determined

In response to: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Hi @Former-Member
Waves back

In response to: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Any self care happening Bro?

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Self care is non existent at the moment @Former-Member

Feeling weary so pretty much operating on auto and doing what needs to be done.

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Family over tonight for weekly dinner date, feeling bad that I was not particually focussed. Mum understands at least.

In response to: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Oh dear @Determined was hoping you may have been able to sneak out just a little.

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Had another couple councilling appointment on Tuesday, picked some scabs off some old and not so old wounds (councillors words not mine), in the long run hoping it may help but quite a draining process. Adding travel it is an all day event for a 1hr app.

111 - 120 of 2,306