My beautiful son

@2853 Hi 2853 and welcome I wish it was under better circumstances that we first meet. I am so sorry that you have had to live through this it is horrendous to have to put your child into a mental health facility as a unvoluntary patient (it kills you deep inside I know I have been there).

You are right no one knows the pain unless you have lived through it. I remember the hate when I went to visit my son once when he was in hospital ... he was psychotic again ... and just the look in his eyes. I am so sorry because yes it changed me forever as I am sure it has changed you. The most important thing for you to do now is self care. Your son is in hospital being looked after and as you say asleep for a day or so so it gives you time to get help for yourself which you will need.

Have you got close family to help you through this ... friends .... We are here and we are a friendly bunch with different but similar in many ways stories who are always willing to listen and care when you are at your lowest. You might like to look around the forums and see the differing threads some of the chat sits are really nice to have a virtual cuppa and let it all out ...

Again do no despair this is the first step in the road to recovery for you son. Just look after yourself that is absolutely sick mum=sick child.

Hello @2853 and welcome to the forum

Every siuation is different my friend , when my husband went to hospital, his build up leading up to going to hospital was getting bigger and bigger , we have a little hospital so they sent to a bigger hospital 60 km away

so by the time I got myself up there , finding somewhere to stay and to find where he was and found out he only wanted me and his daughter to visit , no one else

but the build up was soo huge that they were blaming me for everything , sending you tender hugs my friend and to let you know you are not alone

even though how hard it is -- self care is very inportant , we need to look after ourselves to look after others xx

@Former-Member

Hi @2853 and welcome like @Bunniekins I wish was under better circumstances.

I trust you can find the support you need here. You will find everyone here most welcoming and supportive. I have found friendships here to be invaluable over the past year.

Do you have friends or family who can help you through this? As greenpea mentioned, self care is vital at times like this. Something I consistently fail at.

I still remember the tears and pleading not to leave her when I have had my wife admitted on more than one occasion last year (as a voluntary private patient). I can't begin to imagine what you are going through.

Hi @2853, I'm not sure that we've met before...I'm one of the Moderators here on the Forums. I'm so glad that you have reposted. It sounds like today has been a very tough day for you. It is extremely difficult to place our loved ones in involuntary care. It is very normal to experience feeling of guilt, or worry, especially as a mother. It is only natural for you to want to protect your son and I am sorry that you are hurting after your experience today.

I see that you have already found some great supports in @Bunniekins, @Shaz51 and @Determined 🙂 Connecting with people who have been through similar experiences to you can be really helpful. As everyone else has mentioned already, self-care will be really important for you at the moment. I understand that sometimes we may not feel like it, having been through something so traumatic but I hope you are able to try, even it's just for 5 minutes, to do something for you? What do you usually to do look after yourself? You are also more than welcome to reach out to our Help Centre if you'd like to chat to one of our counsellors either on our online chat, or over the phone (1800 18 7263) ...

Hello @2853

It is such a terrifying experience to go through..

There is always so much pain to bear leading up to the time where we are helpless..we cannot take any more abuse...siblings are affected..

my older son was involuntarily detained twice ..ambulance ..cat team and police..assesses and padlocked to the bed..taken out to the ambulance..so painful to witness..more painful to see him in the psychiatric ward...knowing when he talks to you ?..it does not sound like his voice...the first detainment not diagnosed properly..he was an adult..34..his younger cousin signed him out..

3 years later..delusional and paranoid detained involuntarily again..visited him in hospital..his voice an icy tone talking rapidly..each time I visited..eventually held down to have depot injection..released on Cto for 3 months..lived with friends ..he eventually told me where..I visited took him to town ..did food shopping..took him towels etc..he is on no medication and believes that a sio..mI5 and Cia...Turnbull..trump and some of his own friends are after him and myself...

he contacts us...unable to ring him..has phone off due to radiation fear..

we don't know where he is..

I have not heard from him for 4 weeks..the last few contacts have been for more money ..told him can send no more..so no contact..

I am learning to live in today..my son is still there,,

until he helps himself I cannot help him he is out of control..

I cannot think past that..

I ring lifeline occasionally and one of the males said to me that there are so many mothers like myself ringing up re grief for lost son.he said my exhusband and self are enabling him.

wtite on here vent your feelings..

keep setting boundaries..

self care

and if you are like me never ever stop loving him or giving up hope

yes I believe that your son knows that you love him..he is frightened and needs professional help

@2853

Yes sadly manipulation has been a huge issue with my son for many years of his life looking back..

his dad had different ides re bringing up children..His theory based around materialism...give them what they want..

my idea totally different learn to save up for things...early training for saving..budgeting...of course clothing I did buy..

when we separated he tried very hard at playing off each parent...learnt to manipulate his dad and me to a small degree..then I set boundaries..

it was in your face stuff that I hated...always demanding...not relenting..

he has been interstate address unknown for nearly 15 months now..

I think that eventually the illness will be so apparent that he will be detained ..as for how long and whether he continues medications I have grave doubts..

I just get through day by day..

hopefully your son will not get to that stage...has he been given a diagnosis?

keep talking..releasing your emotions

Hi 2853 good news about your son. I agree with you whole heartedly with a drug and alcohol programme. Baby steps me thinks you do not want to go through all of this anguish again ... with my son he basically has grown out of his anger issues but has schizophrenia amongst other issues and that will never change but he has improved and I cannot ask for more than that.

I would trust your mother's instinct (dont let yourself be pushed around) and go with the programme. Wishing you and your son all the best.