Cancer took my husband of 40 years. Not coping.

Hi there @Starta, I'm River9, one of the other Moderators here on the Forums. I just wanted to write you a note to let you know that my sincerest condolences are with you. I am so sorry to hear that you have lost your husband of 40 years. Please know that myself and other Forums members will be sitting with you as you grieve - please keep continuing to reach out when you need to, we will be here.

How lovely @Starta

Do they live near you

I have 4 step children who are adults and their partners have children who call me Nan

@Shaz51@Former-Member

Thank you both and everyone,

No all my family live in the city, I live central west .

That is so beautiful they call you nan

2 of my grandchildren are stepgrandchildren, love them all equally.

I remember one time a few years back all 13 of them decided to sit on their pops knee, my hubby couldn't stop pretending that his knees were broken, when they all got of him, he chased them outside and they all had zoopper doopers,

Oh missing him, what am I supposed to do now?

one day at a time my friend @Starta

one step at a time , My father in law passed away last year and my mother in law had cry time , it is good to do something each day even though you don`t want to

Keep in touch here and keep sharing and talking , we are here for you

Hi @Starta

I have been reading along with your post and see that you are grieving for your husband. My story is a bit different but hoping I can help just a little. My father passed away from a terminal ilness almost 3 years ago now. He and my mother were married for over 40 years. When you write about your husband and how you are missing him, it sounds a lot like how my mother talks to me about my father. So I wanted to share some things that she has done since. In no way is she over the pain of losing her husband, I don't think that will ever go away, however she has started trying to do some things for herself.

A good organisation that you could speak to on the phone is Grief line, I have attached a link here for you. http://griefline.org.au/

My mother is also involved in a group for ppeople who have lost their partners. It was organised through the local hospital and the pallative care team. They catch up and go out on activities, talk, meet for coffee. She likes it becasue people can realte to what she is going through

She has joined a local sewing group that meets up for sewing/chatting/coffee

She has also started to see a psychologist to help her deal with alot of her emotions around his death and also her isolation, anger, loneliness, etc.

I hope in someway this helps just a little bit. It has taken my mother a long time to get to this stage and recognise that she needed to reach out for help. It shows a lot of strength and courage to ask for help.

I will be think of you

@Former-Member

I can't seem to leave my front door this past month.

At night I sleep on the lounge with his favourite Jacket, It still has his scent on it.

I don't know if I can do this, I know my depression has taken me down a lot and without him here I'm just getting in deeper then ever before, I really don't care.

Hi @Starta

I am hearing you. Can you give grief line a call, or they have online support too that might help. They might be able to help in ways I cannot.

@Former-Member

Thank you, I will try them tomorrow,

Night time are so bad, One of my dogs is so miserable, she keeps going up to hubby's chair sitting on it and whimpering, so very sad. She misses him as well 😢😢

Hello @Starta, have been thinking of you today , I hope you are ok , sending you tender hugs my friend

Hello @Shaz51.

I hope you are well,

I don't know what to do anymore, I have bo one to look after , cook for, clean for, talk to, just totally in limbo ..