rough time

@Sans911count me in!

What is it with you and @outlander writing essays?!!!!!!!

this one was a quick one! @Snowie do you know hard it is to be patient when you know shes on the phone and typing it up. have you ever seen zootopia with the sloth typing?

haha sorry sis, love ya to pieces though @Sans911

Writing essays gets it all in one hit @Snowie

Very true @Sans911!! I don't know how you do it off your phone however. Very clever you are!!

I am on laptop tonight @Snowie, but have written same on my phone too. I don't type with my thumbs on my phone. I type like I do on a laptop, but only one finger. I am very clever xx but slow

I generally do stick to the rotuine but when I know its going to be a very long night and im wide awake I dont see the point in trying to force myself sleep. It doesnt work all that well for me so just going with the flow. If im tired and I log off early ill got to bed if not ill see whats happening here.

This past yr has ben shocking. I had way too many tests and appts and whatever else so at least that was settled. Not for much longer though.

' I just try not to ensure I dont pack too much into my days' says you whos out changing the world!

Like you slowing down for me is really hard, ive always been active and busy and doing this or that and it only got busier through yr 11 and up so slowing down feels strange. Like im forgetting to do something but im not or I actually will forget because im so use to being on my toes.

@Snowie@Sans911Well it looks like we are learning together on that one. Figuring out who we are underneath all the shite.

Saying no- that one is really hard. Because even when I think about saying no it seems Im already roped in and the decisions been made for me. Theres been a few times I had no idea wtf was going on and ive been expected to do this or that and had no clue about it so was put on the spot.

Ah yes next week. Yes its terrifying me. The 31st of march till the 3rd of march is the dates of my sister and I dog attack and hospitalisations. All of april Is pretty much just as bad on certain dates- around 6 dates all together so that month will be hard. A few months after I had my first breakdown and hospitalisation/attempt. So yeh abit nervy around that.

I havent heard of Brene Brown no but have made a note of it and will take a look when I can.

Hmm yes, I had a talk with this person, it was someone I was starting to trust. They have been through the wringer too but I can say they had a lot of support with friends family, mh professionals, hospitalisations etc so was pretty hard to hear them say I need to work it out on my own. They werent ignorant unfortunatly. That was one of my reasons I stopped talking on here.

I dont feel only 21 yrs old. I feel so much older than that and feeling like all the fun gets sucked out quite a lot. Both good and bad I suppose. I can write better than I speak so thats the joys of being here I can think and post not be put on the spot so much.however theres times where i feel younger too like ive got no idea what to do and need more guidnace than maybe someone my age might need. like im stuck at a certain age but i get past that. doesnt happen all that often

I trust my sisters here a lot, if I needed someone to save me I would hand it over to very few. I can only be so open on here as well due to confidentiality. Seriously If someone found I was here all hell would break loose and I would much rather stay here and limit the details abit than for someone to find out who I am. I have learnt so so much from being here. A lot more than I have from professionals. I learn from others not from sitting in a room being pressured to talk and getting nervous over it. Or being told to figure it out myself when I have no experience in what im dealing with. Obviously not all things work for everyone but trial and error.

I find a lot of things that remind me of my forum family too. There was a joke but I cant share it as it doesnt fir the guidelines but that wouldve been something to share out coffee shop preferably not while drinking.

Its really hard to accept the compliments youve written, I dont really know how to take them but thank you.

Those dbt skills sound great- dont forget to tag me into them so I dont miss them.

edit: : sorry- had to edit something out of the post

im alwasy nice 😉 @Sans911