rough time

Thanks @Shaz51,had depression from early teens but I question whether it is depression or just that I knew I'm not good enough.Have to log off now,not in a good place.Thanks.

Hey @outlander how are you going?

just about ready to give up @Snowie really sick and tired of all this crap. if only moving away from it all including my own brain and body was an option. i had such a horrible dream that i highly doubt would happen but it worries me as it goes into my fears. doesnt look like ill be sleeping anytime soon now

Oh @outlander i wish I was there with you to wrap my arms around you and keep you close. I read about the gp visit and how it didn’t go well. I know what happened last time you went a long time without sleep and don’t want to see you go down that same path this time.

I know what is like to give up sis, we just have to try and keep going somehow. I wish I could tell you it was going to get better. ❤️💜❤️💜

@Snowiethat would be nice well i dont think ill be getting much sleep from here on. they arent going to give me any sleepers or prns or anything. that dream last night really turned me off those tablets- it played on my sexuality (in question) a first date and it not going so well and a very bad thing happening despite saying no.

im not sure what im suppose to do now, i feel like ive been going around in circles as soon as it gets harder and i ask for support they all run for the hills. nice kick in the guts. im too scared to say anything else to anyone otherwsie they might send me to hospital and where they send me its a 2 night stay and like how you were. trapped indoors and not really leaving that room. when i was admitted last yr after my mother and her bf yelled at me for attention seeking, they came into that ward i was in and yelled but quietly (that tone) and said do you want to go to the other side and be with all the mur**rs or rap**ts, are you really that sick in the head' turned me off wanting to go elsewhere or ask for abit more help and have something like you have with the groups.

oh and you asked what ive been doing- i went to gp this morning, scrubbed the house through the day, went to work and watching sisters for abit, jsut finsihed doing dinner and now waiting for married at first sight is on and talking to you guys here @Snowie

sending you all tender hugs @outlander, @Snowie, @Former-Member, @Bunniekins , I love you all sooo much

@outlander I know you don’t want hospital and I have to admit the first few days were hell, but I do think I need it. And maybe it is what you need too. You cannot keep going on like this with no sleep hun. Something will give and I’d hate for that to be you. My mother isn’t really coping with me being in here and I was hesitant to come in because of here, but I had to put myself first and so do you.

Hi @Shaz51 hope you are going well

Love you too @Shaz51