rough time

Hi @Shaz51 how was your day?

Right now I am angry, angry at me being this weak, angry that I have had to ask exh2 to stay tonight. Angry that life is so dam hard, healing process seems to be to f**ken hard. Angry mainly because I am not use to feeling like this. This is not my role.

Because I am never in this mindset I don't know or have any idea of what I should do.

@Lee82 , thanks for listening

ohhhh snding lots of tender hugs @Former-Member

@Lee82, very tired but ok my friend xxxx sometimes needing some encouagement to keep on keeping on

Hey sweetie, if you type doctors putting baby to sleep into your YouTube search bar I think there is more than one doctor that does it. Your are right there is no way this is harmful or unsafe to baby.

Izzy has what is called DID as a result of horrific childhood abuse. In really basic terms her mind split and locked away the abuse and we "alters" where created. I am Izzy's protector and when things are too tough or are getting physically dangerous she shuts down and I come forward. I am not sure if I explained that well enough but you could always google it. It's full name is Dis associative identity disorder.

Forgot to tag you in my reply @Lotusgirl

Thanks for the hugs @Shaz51

Hope you are doing ok and can get some rest tonight. Nikki

ohhh my @Former-Member , sitting with you xoxox

@Former-Member

Oh hun you need to be kind to yourself. I know this feeling must be forign for you. We all feel weak at times you just have to remember how strong you truly are. You have been through more than your fair share of pain but you are still here doing what needs to be done on a daily basis. You haven't surrendered you choose to fight. You are a fighter. You are a protector but you are human and also need some tender care.
do not be angry for asking exh2 to stay the night. That in its self shows me you are willing to do what it takes to self care and also shows me strength for reaching out. You have done the right thing hun.
I am going to quote what you told me last night...The process of healing is not easy! It is long and exhausting at times. You have to stay strong. I know you can do it. I see the strength you have in Protecting Izzy so channel that strength and take care of you.
Be gentle to yourself my friend and acknowledge how far you have come even though it feels you may have taken some steps backwards in the healing process.
have to tried listening to the white noise Izzy uses after a flashback. Maybe that will help. Remember to breath gorgeous.

Thanks sweetie @Shaz51 💖

hugs my friend @Former-Member