rough time

Yea easter is especially hard for me too. Not having the usual distraction in place this Easter is going to make it especially hard. This week has been a really rough week for me. I can't pinpoint what made this week any different. Everything just seemed to hit me all at once. SH has been a problem this week too. The urges have been too strong and I seemed to lose the fight every time. Been beating myself up about it.
anything you wanted to talk about @Former-Member ? I am always here to listen.

@Lee82 , please know you have a friend in me and plenty of others here as well and we want you to stay strong because you are honey.

SH is getting the better of me as well. It's amazing how much harder we make it for ourselves by beating ourselves up over it. I don't want to and want to live but sometimes it so strong.

Things are just getting tougher, I have to return to work next week and I feel like I have been bullied into it and am scared to hell about what is going to happen and how am I going to cope. It is my first Easter without my husband, we would spend the day with our children and granddaughter. So no hubby and I only have one child at home so I don't get to see the others or my granddaughter 😞 hating myself so bad right now for not coping

Please don't hate yourself @Former-Member. You are so right we do put to much pressure on ourselves. We need to learn to be kinder to ourselves

I'm so sorry you don't feel ready to go back to work and you feel you are being bullied into it. That is not fair or right. You should feel safe and be under no pressure to get back so quickly. If you broke your leg and was in Plaster for 6 weeks they wouldn't be pushing you to go back. Because it's a mental health issue they don't get it and think it's no big deal just get over it and move on. However in saying that maybe once you have made it through the first you may feel better about it. It's always the first step that is the hardest. Positive thinking may help (I can do this. I am strong and capable.) you are strong @Former-Member because you make it through everyday. When you go through an unbelievably unbearable day you are able to wake up the next morning and push on. That to me is unbelievable strength.
very understandable for feeling sad about not being able to see your family on Easter. This makes coping even harder. Could you maybe FaceTime your family for a little while so you can at least talk to them and see your granddaughter?

Hi @Lee82 & @Former-Member,

I'm sorry to hear on this end you guys are also both struggling with self-harm urges and self-downing thoughts. Similar to @Former-Member, I fully acknowledge the stress you are both under at the moment. It's awesome to see you are all supporting each other at this time, as we know it can be really difficult operating with these feelings and we want you to have a definite sense of solidarity and comfort here on the forums. Please keep in mind you can contact Lifeline and/or SCB Service to chat anytime, or 000 if you need instaneous help. Please take care and we will continue to be here to support each other.

Deepest gratitudes,

Otter

I hope I haven't upset you @Former-Member

Thank you @Otter . The forum has been a big help in making me feel less alone. Thank you for connecting

@Lee82 @No you haven't upset me. I had to step away for a bit went into meltdown. It's all just too much. Had a great session with my counsellor this afternoon but as always when I have a break through I generally have a breakdown because it all seems so hard. Sorry for taking so long

How is your night going

Thanks @Otter , i am so great full for the support offered here. It really helps to have people understand what I am going through and know it's not easy to just get over it.

Oh no that's totally ok my friend. No need for apologies @Former-Member one of my curses is severe paranoia. The absolute last thing I want to ever do is upset you or anyone on the forum.
I am glad you had a good session with your counsellor but I am so sorry you had a meltdown. 😞 I totally understand that though. I also always have a meltdown after seeing my psych. Good timing for a session with your counsellor just before the Easter weekend. I hope it was helpful.
I am hanging in there. Have a sore chest from my anxiety and feeling a little agitated. Big day tomorrow mentally and I'm starting to already feel anxious about it.
How are you feeling now?

@Lee82 , I will be on and off here all day tomorrow, so please tag me so I can support you through tomorrow.

I am not feeling strong right now. I have started a little thing with my daughter where we are putting smartarse ( not offensive ones) comments on our bedroom windows making fun of the stresses of isolation. So right now I am trying to do mine for tomorrow.

I hope your pain settles down soon my friend💖