outlanderSenior Contributor
rough time
is anyone around to talk to atm
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rough time
20097 replies
In response to: rough time
Sans911Senior Contributor
Re: rough time
Yeah, I'm OK. Getting a little overwhelmed with having to unpack and do vacate clean. Don't know if I'm going to fall apart a bit when it's all done. My new place is full with boxes everywhere, and hardly any room to move.
How are you doing today? @outlander
How are you doing today? @outlander
In response to: Re: rough time
outlanderSenior Contributor
Re: rough time
it can be pretty overwhelming @Sans911
can you have a break from it tonight or for a while? or if you like we can do bit by bit together for a while?
mmm im worried about talking about me atm, i will probably crumble if i start doing that.
can you have a break from it tonight or for a while? or if you like we can do bit by bit together for a while?
mmm im worried about talking about me atm, i will probably crumble if i start doing that.
In response to: Re: rough time
Sans911Senior Contributor
Re: rough time
I'm sorry to hear you're not so good. I hope you start to settle soon. I'm concerned about you.
I'm going to start to unpack the books soon. The boxes are in front of the bookcase, so I'll do as much as I can. I still did my afternoon at the charity shop and it was very busy.
I'm going to the movies and lunch tommorow with a friend, but I'll go back to the house and clean the kitchen in the morning.
Can you talk about anything that's happening with you, even just about what you've been doing? I feel like I'm taking all the space up and being a chatterbox @outlander
I'm going to start to unpack the books soon. The boxes are in front of the bookcase, so I'll do as much as I can. I still did my afternoon at the charity shop and it was very busy.
I'm going to the movies and lunch tommorow with a friend, but I'll go back to the house and clean the kitchen in the morning.
Can you talk about anything that's happening with you, even just about what you've been doing? I feel like I'm taking all the space up and being a chatterbox @outlander
In response to: Re: rough time
outlanderSenior Contributor
Re: rough time
sounds like agood plan, i still have to finish up the dishes for the night and refix the bathroom up so its one less thing to do tomorrow.
i havent forgotten about tomorrow either and what day it is. and your plans for then sound lovely. what will you be watching?
i have been having a clearout and cleanup the past day or so, its been a good distraction i completlty emptied the cupboards and everything and got rid of all the old/broken cups plate, pots etc and scrubbed out all of thecupboards before restocking as well as mowing the yard yesterday since it was cooler.
ive just got alot of things on my mind, done silly things the past few days and can just feel every part of me slowly crumbling and i dont have the energy to keep putting it all back together anymore.
i am really sorry i really dont mean to push anyone anyway either. i dont know what im doing 😞 i dont want to hurt anyone else and the amount of judgements ive had i just struggle with talking much. it is very frustrating and upsetting that the more i talk the worse i get which makes it so hard to be here even though i want to be
@Sans911
In response to: Re: rough time
Sans911Senior Contributor
Re: rough time
I'm sorry, I'm not trying to push you to talk. Not about anything that makes you uncomfortable. I'm really sorry. And I'm certainly not judging you at all.
Would it be better if I left alone? I just feel like my talk is unimportant and mundane, and one sided. So it's hard for me too lil Sis.
I'll be here in the background if you want me
Would it be better if I left alone? I just feel like my talk is unimportant and mundane, and one sided. So it's hard for me too lil Sis.
I'll be here in the background if you want me
In response to: Re: rough time
outlanderSenior Contributor
Re: rough time
No its definently not you sis it is offline with professionals and family again. They dont listen and they are so quick to offer judgement and unwarranted advice like why arent you doing this or that rather than saying maybe i can give you a hand with 'this or that'. @Sans911
I will see if i can get a bit more words together, please give me a few min though cause im on my phone and its slow typing.
Please dont sit in the background, that is the last thing iwant to happen.
I will see if i can get a bit more words together, please give me a few min though cause im on my phone and its slow typing.
Please dont sit in the background, that is the last thing iwant to happen.
In response to: Re: rough time
outlanderSenior Contributor
Re: rough time
i had physio on wednesday which was ok and she does listen and we have agreed on the next steps moving forward which is using the boot less now and only use it if im out walking all day e.g big shopping sorts of days but the more easy going days keep it off and we altered some of the physio exercises i have to do. i see her again in 2 weeks time. She used an ultrasound machine to try and help with the healing process as well as a calf and foot massage to release the tension, she also taught me some of those techniques. It was ok until i got off my foot and i wasnt able to walk-at all. not even with the boot, so im thinking it mightve been a little much in that session but its eased alot now and the pain has reduced allround even after walking around quite abit, just that achy sort of feeling except the occassional twinge.
In response to: Re: rough time
outlanderSenior Contributor
Re: rough time
i ended up having a an early psych appointment on friday and just needed abit of time to think about that session. im not really sure what to make of it but some of the comments she had made still doesnt sit well with me but at this point she is combining trauma work with DBT, she also knows about my sh starting up, what i has planned for the other day which well didnt happen becasue im still here. what made me more uncomfortable though was i had to talk to her about something which ill get to again in a sec but she was very quick to say things like ' why doesnt your mother do that' and those sorts of things. it makes it hard to open up when i know that the things that are happening atm like me having all these roles arent quite right but i also cant change that right now. or things like 'why didnt you contact a helpline' or 'see your gp' and those sorts of things.
i hadnt spoken to her about a few other things yet but i think i might need to wait and try to get some of this therapy done with further coping methods before i go into some of the surface stuff with her as well.
i hadnt spoken to her about a few other things yet but i think i might need to wait and try to get some of this therapy done with further coping methods before i go into some of the surface stuff with her as well.
In response to: Re: rough time
outlanderSenior Contributor
Re: rough time
ill make this one the last part for now.
I am very torn as to what to do about my carers role. With knowing that pop needs more help than just me but family is very unwilling to help out if i ask (they might if he asks but he wont) i dont know what to do. I had asked mum to come with me to the drs to speak to his gp about getting him assessed as i guess a pre-warning to the drs and to also find out what i can do too but she is hesitant and has 'fought' not physical like resistance sort of thing every time ive tried to make the appointment. I feel i am failing pop because i cant get my act together to get him the help he needs.
I had an explosive moment the other day and i left, i had enough of his complaining, his behaviours, the constant blame etc and i had a few choice words and left. i didnt know if i was going to walk back in the door which is when i went 'missing' and had other ideas on where i was heading.
we seem to be talking more now, but i think i am at the end of my tether now and if something doesnt happen then i dont know how much longer i will last.
There are other things but i think this is enough for now.
@Sans911
I am very torn as to what to do about my carers role. With knowing that pop needs more help than just me but family is very unwilling to help out if i ask (they might if he asks but he wont) i dont know what to do. I had asked mum to come with me to the drs to speak to his gp about getting him assessed as i guess a pre-warning to the drs and to also find out what i can do too but she is hesitant and has 'fought' not physical like resistance sort of thing every time ive tried to make the appointment. I feel i am failing pop because i cant get my act together to get him the help he needs.
I had an explosive moment the other day and i left, i had enough of his complaining, his behaviours, the constant blame etc and i had a few choice words and left. i didnt know if i was going to walk back in the door which is when i went 'missing' and had other ideas on where i was heading.
we seem to be talking more now, but i think i am at the end of my tether now and if something doesnt happen then i dont know how much longer i will last.
There are other things but i think this is enough for now.
@Sans911
In response to: Re: rough time
outlanderSenior Contributor
Re: rough time
and @Sans911 your talk is important to me, nor have you ever pushed me to talk about anything and i havent ever felt judged by you. reading back i think i chose my words very poorly and that wasnt the intended affect. i was so worried about hurting someone that i forgot to be a 'human' to and think before i act/write/speak. i am really sorry sis, those words were very poorly chosen and dont reflect you or what you say at all. please forgive me..
