Depressed boyfriend ended relationship

That sounds lovely @Anna88 ..... what a gorgeous Aunty ❣️

Hello @Anna88 ! I don` t wanna bother you but i read your topic and this is what happens to me right now sort of. I had a relationship for a year and a half and after a month my boyfriend started having some symptoms that were not organic. Months later he was diagnosed with depression. I stood by his side, encourage him and try to help him but it got worse. A few months ago he told me he thinks that this depression is because of me, because it started soon after we started dated even though everything between us was perfect, we never fight or argue nothing. So he wanted us to break up for a while so he can get better and then be back together. So that was what we did, we broke up and get back together for a few times because he said he loves me so much and cannot live without me, then he wanted to break up again and so on. Now we broke up again in april and he said he wants to get better and then see what will happen with us, but he didn`t tell me that he wants us to get back together or not. He said that he wants first to get better and that he can` t tell me what he will what then, but that he loves me and somehow he will always love me. Since april we have seen each other for a few times, but now for almost a month we had no contact. As we were apart he had those symptoms; stomach pain, insomnia, depression, couldn`t eat. even though he wasn`t with me he didn`t get better. He was even diagnosed with somatic symptom disease and depression but he is not taking his meds. And now I don`t know what to think really. Why is this caused by me if i didn`t do anything bad to him? I really want to get back to him after he gets better, but right now i don`t know what he wants. Last time we talked and i asked him what he wants he said he wants to get better and he wants us to talk again. But i don`t know if as a friend or a girlfriend.

How did things solved for you?

Hi @feilig08, I'm sorry to hear that you are in a similar situation and I hope you find some good advice in these forums. If you don't mind I'll tag @Faith-and-Hope in here as she may have some advice for you.

My situation remains unchanged unfortunately and I think for my relationship is probably permanent. I haven't heard anything from my ex boyfriend for nearly 7 months now. He asked for no contact while he worked on getting better, so I'm not overly surprised but don't think he will get in touch again, it feels like too much time has passed for him to randomly decide to get make contact. With your partner, do you know if he had a history of depression and are you close to his friends and family? I hope it all works out for you.

@Anna88 I am so sorry to hear that. My boyfriend was diagnosed with depression and he is now into cognitive behaviour therapy, but i don't think he is taking his medication. Last time we spoke he told me he is sick of taking pills to fall asleep and he never respected exactly his medication program.

What hurts is that he said his feeling for me got him like this. Because he was not like this before we started dating. But also he has irritable bowel syndrome and other digestive problems and experienced anxiety before. I am not in touch with his friends and family. So it' s no contact at all. He is so alone right now. He only has like 2 friends he is talking to right now. He isolated himself. He hasn't a good relationship with his parents even though they live together.

How did you move on? Because now all I think of is him and hoping some day we will be back together. I can' t concentrate, I have insomnia and that really afects my daily life. I am in medical school and is the exams period and I can't focus. How can I get him out of my mind?

@feilig08 it's very sad that he said you are the reason for his depression when you had a lovely relationship.

As far as moving on, I feel like I have in some ways and not yet in others. I don't know if I'm ready to date just yet or move on in that regard but I rarely cry anymore and sleep fine etc. Time really does heal us, when I look back at how I was 7 months ago when it first and how I am now I feel like I'm back to my normal happy self and looking forward to the future and possibly meeting someone new.