Art THerpay

Ooooh that is cool @Baboo!

The antipsychotics have killed my creativity. I used to paint & draw, but now seldom do & I miss that part of me... I am gradually reducing the antipsychotic with the help of my psychiatrist, but no creativity has returned yet. I have a few colouring in books, but the negative voices of depression often stop me from enjoying or even working on them. I used to write & draw in journals, but I threw a lot of stuff out as it had PTSD content. I always preferred giving away my paintings if I thought they were any good, but I don't believe I am talented even though I got A's for art in high school (which seems like a life time away). Sorry for being so melancholy... I am very sad & anxious tonight & just wanted to somehow connect to others....

another good writing idea is to write a conversation to your self in the first second and third person.

A silly Example:

Hey Baboo, why so stressed looking?

Oh, work is full on tonight and all i want to do is eat a whole bag of chips in one go... but i need to do paper work.

Can you still eat chips?

No

Why, you love chips

I made my bestie promise to help me not eat al the junk in the house after 9pm any more- i need to get my fit back on...she will catch me, ill have to sit in the cupboard to eat them.

Thats a silly one, but if your having a really low mood its a good stratigie to make your conversations up into a positve and the negative or low mood to debate with... make sure your positive character wins too 😉

I've just come out of hospital... last week I went to yoga twice. I went again today. Yoga helps with anxiety. I wish it wasn't so expensive or I didn't just live in a cabin & had room to do it at home. I'm very anxious about my living situation.... I don't feel I have control over anything & that is when I get the most anxious & start to restrict food.... I don't know what to do right now to help...

Good to see you @Former-Member.

Glad your doctor is supporting your med reduction.

I found yoga very expensive too and could only justify a 6 week class when I was a young mum ... most of the yoga I did was from books ... then for about 4 years I had a yoga teacher as a student ... it was interesting. My niece is doing aerial yoga atm ... they keep making it groovier and more commercial ...

Its difficult when we feel our creativity is missing ... if you were good at art when at school ... its probably still there ... ready to blossom when you are ready ...

I love your ideas @Baboo ... therapy is about finding ways of self expression ... while sometimes the talking cure works ... maybe sometimes it does not ... we are complex beings... other forms are needed.

Narratives can thicken and develop ... and bring new awareness and new ways of looking at the world.

@Former-Member I don't think you're being meloncholy at all actually. I read your post more as a kind of 'stumbling through with honesty and openess'. Both comments you added just hit on so many things for me that I am personally facing that I read them and kind of went "oh! yes, thank you! I so have to reply to these ones"

So the yoga stuff- me too I love yoga, well actually to be more honest, I know that I love it and it benefits me but I find that there are just so many mental blocks for me with doing it. I just so want it to be a part of my life and I find the only way I can manage to do some, is if I kind of sneak up on my self and stealthily manevure around whatever keeps stopping me. And the anoying thing is I can't figure out what that 'thing' is. Having said that, I have come across two things that may relate to your space and expensive classes issue.

Space: sometimes I like to do a chair based sequence, (although it's not so great for becoming a sexy awesome looking yogi aspect, of yoga it does provide me with the mental benefits). This is a link to a chair sequence I quite like https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6VLw2sjvuNU

Money: I came across some audio guided yoga sessions online at one point in time, so I have them saved on my little mp3 player and I just put my ear phones in and do what the very friendly lady with nice background music tells me to do.

Art and creative blocks - Thank you is pretty much all I have to say about your comments here. I always love love love hearing from other artists about their personal struggles with their creative self. Why it comes sometimes and not others? how important creativity is to feeling a complete whole version of ourselves. The way fear interacts with my creative process and blocks creativity. All of it. I love hearing from other artists (which I think we all are in some form or another) about their view from the inside on their personal creative journey.

Thanks @Former-Member - I am going to two places for yoga - one is 20 minutes away apx on Tuesday & the other is 30 minutes away apx on Friday. The instructor on Tuesday only does yoga during the school term & she had a big break earlier this year for some unknown reason. That session is $20 a class (ouch!) The other yoga was $25 for the first 14 days & I went to 3 classes, which meant I did yoga on Thursday as well this week. I am going to buy a pass next week for 10 classes for $130, so $13 a class. It is therapy for me, so I'm making the commitment. I also enjoy running, but I have become very unfit after two hospitalisations this year & very severe depression. I am going to try to get back into running soon by walk/run/walk/run! Wish me luck! I actually ran a half marathon last year, but this year I've mainly ran 5km distances & the most I ran non stop was 7km It is very discouraging. I've had a tough year....

I hate feeling out of control. I became anorexic in my teens, because I wanted the feeling of control. I was not treated, but was later diagnosed with EDNOS (eating disorder not otherwise specifed). Sometimes I slip a bit & restrict my food intake to feel a sense of control, but it doesn't help my exercise efforts & also my bp can get quite low....

Anyhow...

Thanks @grubbytoes - I would like to find an yoga audio session - although I do find it helpful having someone to look at to help me to know what to do. I usually get left & right mixed up & have to look at people around me too! I hope to eventually not take the antipsychotic - I have done lots of research regarding this & "recovery" - I am trying to find a psychologist who does CBT for psychosis - it is a specific tailored form of CBT - anyhow without the antipsychotic I know my creativity will return. I look forward to that. In the mean time I "should" try anyhow - even if I think my efforts are not good enough.....