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The Challenges of Mental Health Wellbeing

The Challenges of Mental Health Wellbeing

I'm not sure if changes from medication, my new role as Community Guide or something else, but something has shifted & this time I hope it lasts. Unfortunately, these shifts in the past two years have lasted mere days, weeks or months before I slip back down the slippery slope of deep and persistent depression. I have an extremely long, slow and painful way to go yet before I can even begin to say that I've started to recover (or whatever you want to call getting better from MI, particularly BPD).

Being a CG seems to have given me renewed purpose and reasons to stay alive, as I feel that helping others in this role means being responsible for my own health & being a role model for others in their journeys. I know I'm not always going to get it 'right'. I'm human after all, with MI, and I have my own frailties & vulnerabilities.

But I'm also incredibly fed up and dissapointed in my life in the last year in particular. I never could never have imagined that I would be in the position that I'm in now, chronically suicidal, repeatedly in Emergency departments that I used to work in that now I'm ashamed to present as a patient & I'm judged by my own peers that I so previously admired & respected.

I been incredibly isolated recently, and I live in fear that my life will come to a premature end by my own doing. But I also been fortunate to have good professional clinicians that I have sought out myself, and had to sometimes fight for. And I have the love and respect of a dear family member which means the world to me.

Through my journey in the last year, my clinicians and I have worked through and adapted a strategy that focuses primarily on keeping my safe, responding appropriately to my frequent crises that I bounce to and from, and supporting my fragile emotional and social needs. It's been incredibly challenging, but I believe it's finally working to improve my life one day at a time.

So now I'm feeling a little stronger and able to take more control over my MI & working towards improving my days and finding purpose again. In order to do this, I've had to be more honest with myself, my clinicians and my personal support about my behaviours that are so harmful and risky, and I have had to trust them that I won't be judged all the time which has allowed me to break down some emotional barriers & I be supported wholly.

By being honest, I'm reducing my harmful behaviours, even though it places me at greater levels of distress and increases my vulnerability. But these levels of distress are also reducing in the span of time I'm staying distressed because I'm reaching out for help earlier.

My GP and psychiatrist whom I saw today are satisfied and agreeable with my current focus, yet are still cautious but suppotive me to assist in steering my own course. So what now? I insisted on staying on 2nd daily medication pick up for safety, weaning myself from sleeping medication even though my sleep patterns are so chaotic and lacking, improving my social interactions a little at a time, finding something to enjoy each day (even if it's the daft cat and his antics), and staying on ad medication for the time being.

Why do I tell you all this? Because I still need your support, encouragement, and occasional guidance to stay on track and keep me focused. Remind me of these goals occasionally, and come on this journey with me. I know you are doing this already, but this is my new chapter (obviously of a very long book).

Thanks for reading

@Former-Member@outlander@Faith-and-Hope@Shaz51@Ant7@Bubbles3@Phoenix_Rising@Former-Member@Bunniekins@MDT@CheerBear@Owlunar@utopia

11230 replies

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In response to: The Challenges of Mental Health Wellbeing

Re: The Challenges of Mental Health Wellbeing

Hi all ..... 👋

That was / is my MIL ..... will never be good enough for her ..... she seems appreciative when I soften towards her, then throws me under the bus with no warning .... sigh ..... I’m a slow learner on an emotional level. Took me years to sign off on the relationship and maintain a cordial, businesslike manner that works, most of the time.

She still has her naughty days @Sans911 @Appleblossom, @utopia .... anyone else who knows one such as this ..... and there’s nothing much you can do with their naughty days other than rising above whatever ratty, bratty behaviour gets dished up in your direction.

That’s my 2c worth .... of course it’s my MIL, not my Mum, which I appreciate is a different planet (especially through / from childhood), but then I lost my mother too soon in my adult life, so no counterweight since then to Mrs-Naughty-Pants .... who is currently embedded in our mi challenges .... grrrrr .....

Hugs to everybody. Doesn’t fix it, but hopefully helps to soothe it .....

In response to: Re: The Challenges of Mental Health Wellbeing

Re: The Challenges of Mental Health Wellbeing

Thanks for everyone's perspective. It's helpful to know we all have troublesome mothers. My history is complicated by the fact I have 2 mothers. My foster mother is a stern woman, much older than my own mother, and she is a woman of few words. But her love for me is strong, and even stronger with her daughter, my foster sister.

My mother said to me a few weeks ago when all this started 'have a nice life with your other family', a fall back barb she has used before many times, or or it was go back to the care home, you prefer that over me. Although my brother said she probably didn't mean it, it really hit a sore spot. It hurt a lot.

I accepted many years ago that she was never going to be the mother I wanted or needed, I would have to accept her as she was. It doesn't mean it wasn't without frustration or tension. It's been hard, really hard at times.

One thing my brother is right about. I need to take of me right now. I very nearly ended in hospital last Wednesday night or worse. She cannot have the power to do that again. I will not fall onto her sword.

In response to: Re: The Challenges of Mental Health Wellbeing

Re: The Challenges of Mental Health Wellbeing

You go girrrrl @Sans911 ❣️

And love your DBT win @Teej .... go you too ..... ❣️

In response to: Re: The Challenges of Mental Health Wellbeing

Re: The Challenges of Mental Health Wellbeing

@Sans911you do need to take care of you now hun.

In response to: Re: The Challenges of Mental Health Wellbeing

Re: The Challenges of Mental Health Wellbeing

I really like that pic you put up @Snowie. 💜

In response to: Re: The Challenges of Mental Health Wellbeing

Re: The Challenges of Mental Health Wellbeing

I’m so sorry that your mum feels the need for emotional blackmail @Sans911. It sounds like a really difficult place to be in. I’ve been trying to put myself in your shoes and the truth is I have no idea what I’d do.

I guess one thing that I thought about is if you feel like your mum loves you or if she is capable of love? It can get messy. I think there is a generation thing too about how our parents communicate love. It’s not always the easiest to feel. My brother and I just went through an experience this year where he shared something with my parents. The person he wanted/ needed approval from didn’t give it to him but told everyone else how proud they were of their son for his accomplishment. I was able to pass that on. Sometimes much gets lost in pride and communication..... and there are lots of people who struggle to be vulnerable enough to share those feelings (that’s often been me too).

Im not sure if this helps, I wanted you to know that you were heard (and felt 😢) for your painful relationship and situation. Loads of hugs for getting through and here’s to not falling on your sword for anyone 💜🤗

In response to: Re: The Challenges of Mental Health Wellbeing

Re: The Challenges of Mental Health Wellbeing

Love that image too @Snowie ......

Hugs @Sans911 .... 💜💐

In response to: Re: The Challenges of Mental Health Wellbeing

Re: The Challenges of Mental Health Wellbeing

Morning all on here today. I hope today has some good in it for you

@Faith-and-Hope@Sans911@Teej@Appleblossom

In response to: Re: The Challenges of Mental Health Wellbeing

Re: The Challenges of Mental Health Wellbeing

Morning my lovely sister @Snowie

How are you today? Anything on for you today?

I have my pyschologist in a few hours.

Morning also to @Faith-and-Hope

@Teej

@Appleblossom

@Zoe7

@outlander

Missed you yesterday lil Sis. Would love to have a check in from you

In response to: Re: The Challenges of Mental Health Wellbeing

Re: The Challenges of Mental Health Wellbeing

Thank you for including me @Sans911

Hope your psychologist appointment goes ok Hon - I know they can be testing at the best of times let alone when we are not feeling great - here for you @Sans911

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