I dont know how much longer i can go on like this

@Owlunar

thank you, I dont want to go back to that though as itll stir it all back up. Im ok accepting that I needed to say no for my own health and thats ok.

Im really glad that despite the past you changed it for a positive and made your loss -rying not to sound insenstive as thats not what im doing- but a worthy cause. You would have achieved a lot in the changes that are now in todays society so from those who cant say thank you ill say it to you.

Sometimes o do feel boring though @dec sometimes its not have all tis maturity and not know how to really live and have fun. I rememeber saying not that long ago to someone I knew they were going partying instead of saying have fun I said stay say who says that at 21 really?

Yes my dear friend I know your thoughts already but that will come in time.

@outlanderhey sis I am around

@outlanderhun it was just a really bad nightmare, it doesn't mean that it will come true at all.

Can you get up and splash your face with water, get a drink. You need to continue with the breathing. it might take longer to feel like you can get your breathe back, but don't stop that slow controlled breathing.

@outlanderthats ok sis, stay in bed then. Try and change what is in your mind. I know it is hard to do, but try as hard as you can to start thinking about something else. Pick something/somewhere you love. Think about it, bescribe it, picture it, picture yourself there, who are you with, day or night, what are you doing. Try and change the image in your head.

It's hard to do I know that, but if you change that image, then you will be able to get some relief