I dont know how much longer i can go on like this

Just catching up with the last couple of days now @outlander. I am so glad you are still here! I hope with all my heart, one day you will be glad too. Until then, we're all here. I still have thoughts every day that I should take my own life, and yes there are so many triggers in the world (for me it is my Father mostly). I am however slowly learning that it is okay to just be, to learn to like myself for who I am and what I represent. Even if I still have these triggers, it's about not letting them churn away inside my soul, get them out (even if it is here on SANE) so that they don't poison me further. I hope that one day, all this darkness is a distant memory and you will reach happiness.

speak to your gp @Former-Member and see what he says. you might jsut need to be more honest...

im sick of being doped up on medications. i was on 5 not too long ago. ive gone off 2 of them because they werent helping, now its just the ads, pain meds and wight loss meds. who knows where else ill end up. i hat ebeing so doped up that i cant do anything but i cant be like this either.

im stuck in the middle.

@Queenieyou do have a habit of letting them slip through the cracks though Q, ive caught you a few times and asked for more honest answers. i dont mind hearing them either, i would rather you actually say whats on your mind then let them eat away at you.

i hope that the darkness lifts for you too, its not very nice walking around or having thoughts pop up that we dont need to be in this life anymore. makes it very dreary doesnt it.

what didnt help me was what i was telling you about on the other thread about that damn song and family with that.

i dont like this one bit, the only thing that keeps me semi normal is knowing that im not alone and that others suffer this too. and it is a suffer not an experience thats for sure.

@outlander,I'm sick of my helplessness like everyone else here.You think the weight loss ones are working?

i understand @Former-Member i really do and alot of us here sadly do. jsut dont stop reaching for help here or in RL

im not sure if they are working yet, they said it could be around 4 weeks to notice some results but as long as i dont keep gaining weight. tuesday i get all results back which will hopefully give me some answers and since im tolerating the side effects of one tablet she will increase it to 2 tablets unless she sees fit for another tablet

i use to be a size 14 and dropping down to size 12 but it seems when i hit a healthy weight i dont loose any more but im big boned as well, so will never be petitie but that doesnt matter i just want to be able to fit into my old clothes. i hate being so self conscious about buying clothes and going out and yet i cant loose it. so im hoping these work or they work out the reason why casue i went from a 14 to 16 in only a matter of 2 months because i kept putting on almost 2kg a week, i found with no period though the more i bloat and have water weight so maybe now itll drop down again now that ive got some sort of cycle happening at least for this week or so anyway. @Former-Member

i think your doing really well, it takes alot of effort to loose the weight. i find when people are too stressed they either loose it fast or it goes the opposite way and we gain it fast, looks like we are the ones who gain the bloody crap hey